MADAM VS. HOUSEBOY (SHORT STORY)

Hello! Here’s a piece of flash fiction about domestic life. I hope you enjoy the story and share your impressions at the end.

MADAM VS. HOUSEBOY

Kamsi was amused by the exchange between his wife and their houseboy, Ebuka. It seemed that as young as he was (16 or thereabouts), Ebuka was finding it hard taking orders from a woman. The result: he was constantly redefining what needed to be done and how to the chagrin of his mistress, Ncheta.

The latest argument was over his substitution of cleaning the toilet for bathing the kids for bed.

“How many baths do these children need in a day?” he had queried when Ncheta confronted him. “Are we to wash them like clothes? Besides, they are old enough to bathe themselves.”

Kamsi was tempted to laugh at the quip about washing the kids like clothes. He also wanted to agree with Ebuka audibly. He had repeatedly told his wife that at six and four their boys, Chuma and Olisa, needed to do certain things for themselves but she said they were still too young.

Children should be taught respect for authority from a young age. Click To Tweet

“What is wrong with you?” Ncheta asked Ebuka in frustration. “Shouldn’t you be following my instructions rather than lecturing me?” She looked to Kamsi for support but he feigned concentration on the paper he was reading.

“There is only one toilet in this flat and it needs to be washed constantly. Would you prefer to see the toilet dirty while I bathe the boys three times a day?”

Watch out for fireworks when authority meets assertiveness. #quote Click To Tweet

Ncheta had no answer to that but she felt that something needed to happen fast. The balance of power in the house was tipping steadily in favour of Ebuka and that was far from acceptable.

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(Related: Brenda’s Ultimatum)
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When Ebuka went to the backyard to fetch water from the tank, Kamsi looked up at Ncheta who had sat on a nearby chair in the living room where the spat had taken place.

“Having trouble controlling your houseboy?” When Ncheta did not respond, he added, “Could it have anything to do with his gender?”

Kids should be taught by precept and practice that females are not inferior to males. Click To Tweet

“What are you saying?”

“I am saying that if you had hired a girl, she would probably have given you less of a hard time.”

“Me? Hire a girl?” Ncheta asked menacingly. “God forbid!” she added, circling her right hand above her head and snapping her fingers.

Kamsi was taken aback. “I don’t even want to imagine why you would say that. But I’m advising you – if you want to save yourself the headaches, stop trying to control this boy. He’s actually a man and he knows it. Give him some latitude to take decisions and stop insisting everything must be exactly as you say. Otherwise, I can assure you that you’ll have more trying days ahead.”

Don't demand your subordinates act like robots. Give them room to show some initiative. Click To Tweet

“Is that your contribution? Are you not the man of the house? Shouldn’t you be calling him to order or is this some kind of male solidarity to put down a female?”

“Don’t go forming any conspiracy theories on this. What I have given you is common sense advice. Take it or leave it.”

Domestic issues should not be seen as solely the responsibility of females. Click To Tweet

-The end-

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© Edith Ugochi Ohaja 2017

Would love to hear from you:

What would you have done differently if you were any of the characters? (You can take all three, one after the other, if you wish.)

You are blessed!

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I am a university lecturer. I teach Mass Communication, mostly writing courses like Feature and Interpretative Writing, Magazine Article Writing and News Writing, and let’s just say I’ve been doing this for a long time. As you have probably guessed, I am a born-again Christian.

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238 thoughts on “MADAM VS. HOUSEBOY (SHORT STORY)

  1. Good short story Ma. Though I thought we should focus more on challenging status quo that put women in disadvantage. I’d love to see this challenged.

    • There are different ways of challenging something. You read the quotes in my tweet boxes. I’m offering education in an entertaining way, drawing salient lessons. That is my own way. Each to his own.

  2. Wow!! So short but straight to d point. I feel d husband is right in telling her to give d boy some space, but he should have said something during d exchange between them… But d man sharp sha, I feel he is jus trying to save his neck

    • Lol! You’re right, my dear! His advice to give the boy some space is good but the reason he gave is bad. He is the product of a patriarchal society who believes that every male, no matter how young, should superintend over a woman and never the other way round. Have a blessed week in Jesus’ name.

  3. What an Exciting read! Good job ma.

    I agree with Ebuka, but his approach to the situation seems rude. At 16, he should learn to give his suggestions politely and with respect.

    Ncheta is been too controlling. In her shoes, I would give the boy (Ebuka) some respect and look into his suggestions. That might solve the problem. Also, the kids have to start learning to do little chores in the house like washing of plates and clothes (even if that means having them rewashed by an adult).

    The husband, would have said something, to contain the situation and to think that a house girl would have given less trouble, is so wrong.

    … to wash the kids like clothes, …??? that was hilarious.

    • Wow! I so love your comment. There’s so much wisdom in what you said. You will make a great wife and mother in the future. ❤️

  4. Good,short and intresting piece ma.
    I really laughed hard wen Ebuka talked of washing the kids like clothes.
    Most times women can be persuasive but men just try to safe themselves from troubles.

  5. Nice piece but I wonder why people prefer female child as helps than male. Does it mean females are more submissive than the male folks? Or they are better house keepers than males?@16 Ebuka is expected to take instructions and not question them.#feminism#

  6. Ncheta’s husband has a very poor orientation about gender equality in the society.he needs to be taught.how could he just “feign concentration on the newspaper he was reading” while his wife was receiving insults from a 16 year old boy
    That’s insane! He was supposed to step up and at least,say something.it’s quite pathetic that the African society placed men above women and most of them have taken advantage of this opportunity to oppress women,but this is where the true essence of feminism should be reestablished.most times.women are the architects of their own misfortune.when you tell your girl child to go and wash the dishes and you make comments like “don’t you know you’re a girl?”
    “Close your legs,you’re a girl”
    You’re gradually sowing seeds that you would reap in no distant time.
    To parents out there,please emphasize on gender equality wherever you are.Feminism and women emancipation begins with you!!

    • You’re right, boys and girls should receive equal treatment but at the end of the day, the man should be acknowledged as the head of the home as the Bible says. That doesn’t mean the woman should do all the work, manage the help, including the bullheaded ones, etc, while the man sits down looking pretty. The Bible says we should serve one another in love – Galatians 5:13. Be awesomely blessed, Jay, in Jesus’ name.

  7. That’s a very interesting story! But Kamsi ought to have corrected Ebuka when he was speaking to his wife in a rude manner.

    • You know, some people don’t realise that a huge part of love is respect. And seriously, you and this woman are one. I would expect that anyone who disrespects her will have a problem with her husband, most of all the hired help.

  8. Wonderful write up. Just as you said, a huge part of love is respect. Kamsi ought to have corrected Ebuka to respect his wife. I presume the outburst of Ebuka may be as a result of the endless work in the house or the way the couple relate to each other. Ebuka ought to have respected the madam of the house. Ebuka also deserved some rest after doing some house work. The couple should also inculcate the idea of how to do something by themselves in the children. The Bible admonished husbands to love their wives, wives to respect their husbands and children to obey their parents. This virtue is seriously lacking in their family. Because if Kamsi loves the wife, he ought to have corrected the boy. The wife also should show respect to the man. Moreover, parents should not provoke their children to anger, including Ebuka. And Ebuka should obey the couple as his parents for him to live long.

  9. Lets call a spade what it should be called. Ncheta should stop pampering her kids. A househelp is not a slave! The way most families treat there househelp will send most parent to jail in the western world.

    • Yes, she should start breaking in her children somewhat. But I’m not sure she was maltreating the boy. He certainly wasn’t complaining about that. Rather, he was averse to doing exactly as she said. Cheers!

  10. Everyone should be respected regardless of gender. Kamsi clearly downplayed the situation by calling it a conspiracy theory. He was present and should have cautioned Ebuka who was very rude to his mistress, Ncheta. I am still trying to figure out who disrespected her more, Kamsi or Ebuka? The sarcastic comment, although hilarious, was snaggy and undermined the point he made. I am happy with the amount of attention given to this issue.

  11. ebuka is really rude to have been making his point in such a manner to his madam nd i surely believe Ncheta is slow to anger if not she would have visited him with a slap. and the husband needs to be talked to for just sitting down there and watching his houseboy exchange words with his wife in an unpleasant manner. it shows he does not respect his wife.

  12. if i were the man, i would have joined my wife in compelling the houseboy to do what is expected of him. Ncheta, is over pampering the kids. one of the least things children can do in the family is to take their bathe themselves. then as for ebuka, he should be submissive to his madam.

  13. The husband should have cautioned the house help no matter how right he might be because that’s belittling his wife before the house help. The house help was rude to his madam as he should have given his suggestion in a polite manner after he might have done what he was expected to do. And for the wife, I think she needs to consider teaching her boys how to take care of themselves at a tender age. I wonder if she intends killing the poor boy with house chores all because he’s a house help.

  14. Kamsi did not do the right thing by not correcting Ebuka. It was very rude of Ebuka to talk to his Madam in such a manner.

  15. What a lovely short story, Ncheta is very bossy, ordering the poor boy around not thinking he has his ways to do things.

  16. Ebuka is not supposed to air his views in such a manner, he should air his views politely, the husband did not try and finally, Ncheta should allow the kids do something in the house so they can start learning on time.

  17. Ncheta’s husband is wrong. He should have stood up for his wife in front of the boy so he would at least learn some respect. A female househelp would make no difference if she’s rude too. If a man should be given space, a woman should too. We are all human and there’s no gender specification as to who deserves space. He still has the mentality that women should be subjected to the domestic work while the men should be left alone and that’s bad. Even though the houseboy has a point, it’s still not an excuse for both him and her husband to disrespect her. They should both learn!

  18. I think ebuka is so wrong. No matter how much of a man he thinks he has grown into he should learn to always respect her because he is still under her roof, eats from her pot and so on. kamsi should have repriminded ebuka for disrespecting his wife.

  19. I believe everything should be done with moderation. Ncheta should consider ebukas feelings and remember he is still human and there are better and subtle ways of resolving issues than shouting or creating a scene. I also don’t like the fact that kamsi didn’t try to caution ebuka. even if he was right there better ways of letting your elders know that you are right.

  20. For the record anyone that tries to insult my wife will hear from me. So I think kamsi did wrong by not cautioning ebuka no matter what you should not talk to your elder anyhow.

  21. Kamsi should have said something when the two were exchanging words and correct the lad. Most times, shouting and reprimanding a houseboy might not be necessary.it is always good to hear them out. But the Madam feels Ebuka does not have right to say anything.. Also, Ebuka was suppose to offer his suggestions politely. On another note, many believes women are inferior in the society and that is really a problem.. That is why men can do any stupid thing for no reason, just because they are men. Nice piece though

  22. This is a creative piece.I like how the story started. The problem in the house of Kamsi is actually from the wife, Ncheta. she was rude and unfriendly to Ebuka, the house boy. the interest and rights of every child should be protected. to me, there is nothing wrong with the attitude of the Kamsi as opposed by Jennifer Joseph because he really want take responsibility as man without exhibiting arrogance or insolence in any way. human rights is inalienable.

    • Okay oh! How about the right of the woman to be respected in her own house by the househelp she is paying? Ebuka is portrayed as a teenager, not a kid. On the matter of Kamsi, he didn’t do well if you ask me. You’re blessed, Solomon!

  23. The truth is obvious. Both the man and the houseboy need reorientation. The husband should have joined his wife in compelling the houseboy to do what is expected of him. But Ncheta is simply over pampering the kids.

  24. Ebuka’s attitude is not out of place in that every individual whether young or old, houseboy or biological child deserves personal dignity and self respect, and the moment we begin to respectfully beg for people’s assistance rather than ordering them around, the sooner we’ll begin to get peaceful compliance from them.

  25. Though the hilarious “washing the kids like clothes” line got to me, this story portrays the gender stereotypes we see everyday. Kamsi was very wrong in having to suggest such ‘common sense’ advice because it is only leverage for Ebuka to keep up with his disrespect. I also feel Ncheta should cut the houseboy some slack as she can also learn from him. Kudos ma! have a lovely day ahead.

  26. I see an act of weakness and cowardice in Kamsi. Why on earth should a man who claims to love himself allow himself to be disrespected in that manner? I say himself because the scripture said two shall become one flesh. Does it mean Kamsi did not understand that for the fact the Ebuka disrespected his wife, he was actually disrespecting him? I can strongly say without any shadow of doubt that Kamsi is weak and does not know the importance of a woman in a man’s life. If he had known, he would have defended his wife who is more than a treasure to his life and family. By the way Kamsi treated his wife, i would say he is not worthy to be a boy let alone becoming a man and marrying a wife.

    • Thank you for pointing out something very important. When a man disrespects hus wife or allows others to do so, he’s actually the one being disrespected. “Two shall become one.” But we would still accord him the honour due him as the head of the home even if he didn’t behave well. You are favoured, Obinna, in Jesus’ name.

  27. Nice piece I must say. One that can easily stir reactions from readers.
    Well as a houseboy, ebuka seemed not to know manners of approach or how to talk to his madam. I understand that every child’s interest should be protected but I believe he talked to ncheta that way because she is female. He obviously wouldn’t have uttered such replies if it were kamsi who gave him such orders. Funny enough, ncheta is trying so hard to make him realize that she can also be a superior in her home. However, what is actually the role of a husband in a home? Kamsi couldn’t have just ignored them no matter what. She still deserves the respect. He can always find a good time to correct her later. But instead he gave ebuka an upper hand.

  28. wow! very interesting story. ebuka should have shown some respect to his madam and not talk to her in that manner. on ncheta’s side, she is just spoiling her kids by not allowing them to do anything at home. kamsi, the man of the house that suppose to caution the little boy was busy laughing at the whole thing.

  29. It’s so so awful. Can you imagine that? The house boy trying to have his way. I guess it’s only obtained in a family that understands that everyone has a say in whatever that goes on in a family both the children and the house boy. I also thank Kamsi for been understanding.. Hope it’s gonna have a second episode. I really love the story. Nice one Aunty..

  30. Ebuka was rude to his mistress and his mistress was too domineering in turn…kamsi on his own part through his reaction has given d houseboy more opportunity to insult his wife by keeping quiet wen d whole drama happened…. If DT should continue… one day ebuka will switch over to insult kamsi if his excesses are not curbed.

  31. I believe sometimes househelps should be given that freedom to do chores the way he/she knows how to do it best because they are already aware of what they are supposed to do..and there you go!ordering him on the format or techniques of how it should be done…
    Secondly,I must commend the kind of relationship the family have with ebuka, the help..he is free to open up and present his own point of view but that shouldn’t be a guarantee for disrespect or exhibiting unruly behaviors…
    In most cases, you get the best from helps when they are free with you…you get to know their capabilities.

  32. Mmm, i will not say i’m completely happy with the way Ebuka replied but I’m happy he stood his ground and gave a completely logical reason for what he did. I’m also happy that kamsi did not support his wife and begin scolding the boy rather he gave a calm sensible opinion. Whether male or female, the basic thing is to treat and train your help well and if they are old enough, allow them to take initiatives themselves. It’ll actually show how much they’ve learnt. Nice read ma 🙂

    • Hi Ifeanyi! Not even one tingini rebuke for Kamsi? Lol! Thanks for your input. We all can learn from one another if we open our hearts. You are soooo blessed!

  33. Ncheta should have reprimanded Ebuka, she hired him and shouldn’t tolerate any form of disrespect from him.
    Kamsi is one hell of a husband he belong to the category of men that belief in patriarchy… he should have scolded Ebuka and make him understand that Ncheta is the woman of the house and should be accorded respect instead he was reading newspaper and calling a 16 year old boy a man and for Ncheta to react in that manner about getting a house girl means that there is no trust in their marriage she is scared that her hubby might make out with girl in her absence… Ncheta should also allow her children do some things on their own that way they will learn and lessen work for Ebuka.

  34. wow brief but very interesting and straight to the point. if i were Ncheta i will not allow him to stay in my house because if you are serving somebody you have to be humble no matter your gender.

  35. This is lively ma, the story line is quite sensitive. Ncheta was just been a Madame of the house, but I feel it’s Kama’s reactions to serious issues like this that gives ebuka the impetus to speak to his wife in such manner, his silence gives him reasons to be rude. What kama was trying to say in essence is, when Chuma is 16 he no longer has right over him because he is a man? It is who wears the shoe knows where it pinches.

  36. SMILES…a little understanding can go a long way in helping people live together in peace. Am not against the kids taking their baths three times a day but one should find out if it is a deliberate ploy to subdue Ebuka. Kamsi is expected to stand by his wife against Ebuka but is it the right thing to do? and Ebuka is supposed to be obedient and not respond to questions with questions but is he actually right? I think everybody deserves a say no matter how little and as I said before a little understanding… thanks

  37. That was very rude of Ebuka to talk to his mistress in such a manner. Though at his age he feels deserve some respect but he should have made his point in a polite way.
    On Kamsi’s part I think he is just trying to save his neck, but he should have cautioned Ebuka because his silent looks as if he is supporting Ebuka. I think Ncheta should consider teaching the boys how to do some things on their own.

  38. THIS IS INTERESTING MA, WHAT I LOVE MOST IS THE SIMPLICITY AND BREVITY OF THE STORY, EBUKA WAS WRONG BY DISOBEYING HIS MADAM AND SHOULDN’T HAVE RESPOND TO HER THE WAY HE DID, EVEN IF HE MEANT EXPLAINING TO HER THE NEED NOT TO DO THAT, IT SHOULDN’T BE IN THAT MANNER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. I WAS DISAPPOINTED IN KAMSI BECAUSE I WAS EXPECTING HIM TO SIDE HIS WIFE

  39. Such a short and interesting story ma. But i think the man made a mistake by saying that Ebuka is a man bcos it will give Ebuka more ego. And it was also funny when he said,washing the children like clothes.

  40. those children are old enough to do alot of things in that house, I wonder why Ebuka will still be bathing them. NAWA OOOH. Ncheta shouldn’t be commanding or ordering Ebuka around but at the same time Ebuka is not meant to be arguing with her because she has the right to send him on an errand. Let my brother try that rubbish, I will slap some sense into him and at the same time slap out that ego. Kamsi, i don’t have anything to say to him……..

  41. Nice story…….. I just don’t understand why Ncheta won’t hire a house girl. We Nigerians have this belief that all house girls are out to snatch husbands

    • Or maybe the women don’t want to lead their husbands into temptation, something about keeping yams around a goat? Lol! But seriously, there’s nothing that shows that a housegirl will give her less trouble. Trouble comes in different packages. She might not answer back but she might do something else. Just solve the problem with the help you have and get on with your life, I’d say. Cheers!

  42. Good story ma, I support Kamsi, Ncheta’s husband, because it not only girls that is meant to do house work, and again, Ebuka should not be arguing with her madam is not good. One should always learn to respect their elders.

  43. I think Ebuka is too pompous and full of himself to be called a houseboy, a houseboy that dictates what is to be done for the mistress is that one worth calling a houseboy? No of course.when it comes to Ncheta,i think she is right because I believe she brought the houseboy for a reason,which of course bathing the children 3 times is no 1 reason for her,so the boy is not in the rightful position to give her flimsy excuses

  44. I can relate with Ebuka because most people hate being told what to do, when to do it and how to do it. Funny enough, when Ebuka finishes with the toilet, he just might bathe the kids again.

  45. very interesting, simple and straight-forward story, Ma! however, its rude for 16-year old Ebuka who is being paid, housed and fed by his madam for his services to have the audacity to complain or question his madam when his services are being needed. it’s equally wrong for Ncheta to feel that its the duty of a houseboy to do all house chores at the detriment of her own kids who can assist in little chores even if its at the supervision of the older ones in the house. what is annoying anyways, is the fact that a husband will be around while his houseboy challenges his wife in his presence and he just sits and does nothing about it…i woudn’t be shocked if his houseboy had slapped his wife and walked away without any guilt. a very good story with lots of lessons to be learnt.

  46. kamsi was right in his choice of suggestion because a man is not to be ordered around as tho he has no right to talk. Although, gender choice does not matter when it comes to employing house helps.

  47. In this scenario, nobody is totally wrong but the way they went about expressing their opinions was the bone of contention. Ebuka felt cleaning the toilet was more important than bathing the boys but he should have talked to his madam in a polite manner and Kamsi should be made to understand that gender is not a qualification when it comes to such issues.

  48. Well, Kamsi is meant to correct d houseboy Ebuka cos it seems he doesn’t know how to talk to his boss…. the idea of having a house girl in order for less problems isn’t nice being a maid or a servant is not a feminine thing… at the age of 6 I was able to bath myself so allowing the kids do little chores is teaching them…. I love the story keep it up MA.

  49. I hope there’ll be a second part, where this Ebuka boy has been sent back to the village, and he now eats palm kernels and sells groundnut. Oh yeah! Lol..joking o.
    But it’s rude to not do what your boss says. And Kamsi is wrong for not taking his wife’s side, it’s almost like he supports the boy not respecting his wife, and that’s terrible.

  50. I think ncheta is scared of hiring a house girl because she has insecurities… The story z interesting n straight to the point, the kind of story I love reading

  51. Short, straightforward and nice story. But I think it’s not okey the way Ebuka talked to his madam in the presence of her husband. whether he is a man or not, a house boy is a house boy and must respect his madam always. The story is interesting.

  52. nice story ma, but in my own view, I think maybe the Madam gave Ebuka a free hand earlier because he can not just wake up one morning and start behaving so rude to his madam.And the madam Ncheta knowing that she is staying with a male house help should know the basic things a guy should help out with at home. And train up her children in the right parts by allowing them to learn how to do things by themselves.

    • Oh so there are things a guy should help out with and some other things only women should do at home? And this convention should be applied to house boys too? I am not understanding oh, lol!

  53. THE WRITEUP IS SO GOOD, VERY BRIEF AND STRIAGHT TO THE POINT. PARENTS SHOULD TEACH THEIR CHILDREN HOW TO BE RESPECTFUL SO THAT WHEN THEY GO OUT, THEY WOULDNT ABUSE OR DISRESPECT THEIR ELDERS. PARENTS SHOULD ALSO MAKE IT KNOWN TO THEIR MALE CHILDREN THAT THEIR SISTERS ARE NOT LESS HUMAN.

  54. in as much as we try to fight gender inequality, we also know that there are things women can do better than men, its just in our nature and especially in the society we find ourselves. Ebuka is just a boy who grew up in the same society where men are treated like “kings” he is finding it so hard to adapt to such life, Ncheta shouldn’t have bombarded him with house chores (lets forget the fact that he is the houseboy), it should be a gradual process, she should at least help out with bathing the children and sometimes the husband could also help out not just in bathing the kids but also doing some other house chores, so that whenever Ebuka is called up to do those works he wouldn’t see it as a big deal or “washing the boys like clothes” lol

    • I like your suggestion that the husband and the wife should help in doing the house chores so that the houseboy is not overburdened. An overworked boy is an angry boy, is a snarky boy. You are blessed!

  55. ncheta should allow the kids do certain things on their own,so as to learn and I pray Ebuka will not soon be in the street.he should just learn to respect his madam

  56. Should kids be washed like cloth……. Lol that was very funny but I think Ncheta’s husband shouldn’t have kept quite when the argument got to the stage where the boy talked back to his madam in that manner
    Ncheta should at least allow her kids to do some chores because what you teach you ur kids today determines what they exhibit tomorrow…. Good story and I please am still expecting it’s continuation

  57. Ebuka’s behaviour should be curtailed. It’s his madam that should assign duties to him and not him choosing his preference. Quite frankly I have one prayer, that I never marry a man like Kamsi. I’d poison him…

  58. Its an amazing story and one that’s very interesting. I feel that kamsi was being too ignorant thinking that having a female maid would be salvation to the problem of disobedience by Ebuka.if I were kamsi I would rebuke Ebuka for being rude and talk to my wife about being too soft on the kids

  59. Its a wonderful story and interesting one at that. If I was kamsi, I won’t have allowed Ebuka to question my wife’s orders because he’s being paid to take orders and execute them.
    I also think Ebuka should have taken his madam’s orders without questioning them and accorded her some respect.

  60. females can never be inferior to males….this should be balanced in the society, both genders should command respect and be accorded one.

  61. Ebuka is being over pampered! I cant tolerate such level of insubordination in my house ohh… On kamsi’s part he should have supported his wife in presence of ebuka, but I agree with kamsi on the part of allowing the kids do certain things for themselves at that age.

  62. Such an educating story,this is what is happening now. Some madams think is right to pamper their kids from doing house chores, thereby overloading their house helps with works without knowing that the house help will not leave there forever. But even at that I still don’t support Ebuka to question his madam or for Kamsi to watch that happen.

  63. This is an educating story Ma, we should teach our children how to be respectful and obedience… We should engage our children in some domestic chores not leaving everything in the hands of the house help. We should teach them the right thing to do for the betterment of their future… Well done Ma!!!!

  64. Female can never be inferior to males both genders should command respect and be accorded one

  65. I think ncheta’s insecurities on her marriage will bring her a long struggle of power if she decides not to heed to kamsi’s advice seeing that ebuka holds his position as being a man despite him being a houseboy. buh, ma haba for ebuka he should remember that woman or no woman she is his madam and he should do as she bids him to.

  66. It is true that our elders are always right, but sometimes it is good to give listening ears to our younger ones.

  67. What a short and simple story ma.For me i felt the advice of the husband is actually a Nice one.giving him space is also very important. But the way ebuka responded to her question was actually very very rude and should not be accepted.this an educating post ma and a must read for parents.

  68. Madam vs houseboy. This story is a food for thought. Its not about the madam but about the type of orientation we give our male folk. Our orientation shapes our life and character, I will not blame the boy for his notion towards house chores but I will blame him for his disobedience. My heart goes out to his madam who is trying to reshape his views and I encourage the husband to help her because his support will go a long way.

  69. This gender inequality observed in our society should cease.. There shouldn’t be anything like inferiority when it comes to the female folks, both male and female should be accorded their due respect. Children should be thought menial house chores so that they don’t end up becoming lousy and useless in the society and the Men who happens to be the head of the family should learn the appropriate way to address issues in the family without being biased…
    An interesting short story .

  70. I believe that Kamsi gave his wife a good advice, Just that his wife on the other hand should have her reasons for not wanting to bring in a girl; might be as a result of fear of having her husband get into extra marital affair with the girl. Sincerely speaking, a girl would have been better or a younger boy of say ten to eleven years

  71. To start with the madam. She should no force him but should look for a milder way of getting him do what she wants. Kamsi could as well sit the boy down and let him Know some things. The post is a nice one.

  72. The man capable of calling the boy to order though not with force. The woman can as well allow the boy some freedom sometimes so that he will not feel overburdened.

  73. It is so annoying how Kamsi acted like he didn’t notice what was happening. She really wanted his backup, to me he could have easily shouted at the houseboy to never talk back at his wife especially in a rude way and later advised her other ways to handle matters with the houseboy. The way he went about it was so wrong. But this is a typical representation of what happens in families these day. beautiful piece.

  74. At 16 he can speak this way to superior, what then will happen when he turns 20?
    Kamsi didn’t act in the way he should, no matter what he should have said something to caution Ebuka even if he do agree with his idea and later talk to his wife about it to show her some respect. Little wonder Ebuka has the guts to speak to his wife that way in his presence, it all shows he doesn’t respect his wife.

  75. Kamsi is not solving the issue the right way, he should have cautioned ebuka for taking to his wife that way and if he wants to talk to his wife he should do that in a polite way.ncheta should also know that her children are old enough to take their bath and also help out in some house chores not waiting for ebuka to do everything.

  76. A boy and a girl should be given the same treatment and nobody is above learning, children can start learning house chores at a very young age it will help them go a long way, there’s no crime for ncheta to bath the children. Thank you ma for this short story.

  77. Ebuka is quite an id##t, if I was the one, I’d have him leave my house before I could finish the sentence …
    One has to know his place and position and act according to his status.
    Not challenging the orders of those above you, it’s really infuriating.

  78. Ebuka is really head strong, he could learn a lot from Joseph in the bible.
    It was because of his humility and hardworking that his master exhalted him above everyone and everything he had.
    Imagine if Joseph had developed the habit of challenging authority.
    He would never have amounted to anything.

  79. I agree with Ebuka. However,his approach to the issue was very rude. He should have spoke with more respect,not just because he is the house boy but also because Ncheta is an elder. Kamsi on the other hand would have said something during the argument,he is the man of the house,but his advice to his wife was good. No one should be compelled into doing things,more especially a teenager.

  80. This story got me laughing out loud. It so much portrays what happens in so many families. The madam was way too authoritative. How could she be ordering a 16 year old guy like that? She should give him some space to take certain decisions on his own. And I think the husband was right to have kept mute during the conversation. At least that was the best thing to do at that point in time.
    Kids of six and three years old should have started learning how to bathe themselves. At least an adult should bathe them once a day (say in the morning), and then they would bathe themselves every other time they want to. That way, they would learn easily.

  81. the man was right at everything he did… I will only add dt he calls d boy letter to address somethings in a better way. ..Bt d man is right.. .D woman should not 4get she z talking to a man and not a machine… .
    Also d husband must call d boy to order be4 d boy sees it as a weakness on d woman’s side and use it against her… .

  82. I will take the advice! Simple… Ncheta is to blame for all. Respect they say is reciprocal, obey your husband, give little house chores to your kids, uplift the burden from Ebuka and he will respect u as madam, simple.

  83. Wow. What an interesting story ma. Ncheta should split the house chores to his kids so as to lessen ebuka’s work in the house.ncheta should know that having a houseboy doesn’t mean that such a person is under your custody to be control in all the affairs of the family and should give him some chances and atimes reprimand him of some actions .but ebuka on the other hand, suppose humble himself before her madam and women should know that having a boy as houseboy is not advisable because men can be obstinate when provoked.

  84. No matter who you are or where you are from, as far as you are working under someone, you are supposed to be submissive to such person, When you also have dominion over someone, you are also supposed to treat such person under you with respect because as human beings, we all have feelings. Kamsi on the other hand should have put Ebuka in a situation that shows that no matter the kind of opinion he has, he should always respect the decisions of Ncheta.

  85. If I were Ncheta, I would get myself a female house help. I will do this knowing and trusting that my husband won’t have any affair with her because I think that is one of Ncheta’s fears. If i were Ebuka, I will humble myself and do what my madam tells me to do because one way or the other, it will help him in future. And finally, if i were Kamsi, I will not interfere in their arguments since I warned my wife to get a female house help.

  86. In as much as Ebuka who’s growing into a man needs breathing space, it doesn’t mean he should be disrespectful to his Elders or his madam. Respect is reciprocal…

  87. I feel her husband didn’t want to be the middleman that’s why he kept quiet during the exchange between the house boy and his wife, but decided to call her to order later. He was right on the advise he gave to her tho, you can’t keep telling a man what to do every time.

  88. it’s nice how Ebuka who is just 16yrs old is able to stand up to his madam in a respectable manner and not being insultive.
    Because madam’s find a way of being abusive and harsh towards their househelps.

  89. Indeed their is power imbalance. Ebuka apparently does not like being pushed around by a woman, Ncheta does not want to hire a house girl and Kamsi does not want to caution Ebuka. This is a big drama.

  90. Kamsi was right in what he said. There are something’s that are too much to ask from a person even from a House help. Ncheta was asking too much from Ebuka and she got what she deserved.

  91. No matter the situation, Ebuka is not supposed to disrespect Ncheta because even the bible recognized hierarchy in family. Though Ncheta too may just want to make Ebuka work because a 6 year old child should be able to bath him/herself.

  92. Men are domineering in nature, its just a trait that comes naturally. I can recall the difficulty my mum encountered back then, upon trying to make my dad’s younger brother buy her idea on everything, hook line and sinker.
    Ebuka needed space, but he shouldn’t overstep boundaries

  93. Kamsi advice was actually cool.giving him his own space will be very useful. As for the manner ebuka responded,i must say is not proper and would have being cautioned by kamsi.these story is actually educative and should be a must read for parents.thank u very much ma for these piece.

  94. this issues is seen in most houses were some house helps tries to lord over their madam which is very wrong and some madams use the house help to practice military rules. i believe that being a house help you should have the opportunity to contribute your opinion by so doing everything will be balance and everybody will be happy. to me the boy didnt give his opinion in a respectful way which is very bad though he was making a very good point .

  95. Ebuka is supposed to be respectful to his madam no matter his gender,he should show her respect even if he is trying to project a cause that is actually right.Kamsi just can’t sit and watch the both of them disagree over issues he can settle by calling Ebuka to order without without maltreating him.

  96. Kamsi ought to caution Ebuka on how he talks to his madam and not making it to look like he is supporting him.
    Ncheta on the other hand don’t have to control Ebuka, at least she should seek for his own opinion in some things

  97. This is a humorous story it really got me laughing. Ebuka has got some nerves to stand up to his madam. But I also think that Ebuka was being disrespectful to her madam, he is living in her house, he should at least respect her opinion ;on the other hand Ncheta is being too mean. A wonderful post

  98. Nice one in a simple and understandable way ma,Ebuka is a typical example of what I would call an adult houseboy.To keep a grown up in the house in the name of a houseboy is actually a work,he will be seeing orders given to him as a disturbance,especially that of his madam.however in this story,It would have been better if Kamsi had played his role well as the man of the house by settling the issue amicably and sharing a view with his wife to console her rather,he took side with the houseboy trying to overthrow the female folk.quite annoying.

  99. For a boy of 16 years old, Ebuka has got some liver! Challenging the woman of the house like that. I still can’t comprehend while women who have house helps , don’t allow their children to do any house work even when their children has come of age! Anyways, Ncheta should try and yield to the advice of her husband so that, she won’t find her self shouting and backing every morning.

  100. Ebuka knew what was right and stood up for that unlike most maids that are employed into homes and do not know there right and are controlled like robots to do every bidding given unto them. Ncheta being the employer felt she had the power to make Ebuka do anything she wants. Ebuka knowing his left from his right didn’t adhere to the instruction given.

  101. Wheather you are male or female, we all should excerise the same rights and freedom.in this story is very bad the way ebuka talk to his madam ,and he should be corrected before it’s too late.

  102. Though disrespect on the part of Ebuka is not good but teaching our children to learn things at a tender age is advisable

  103. Families should not leave domestic works for the house helps alone. House helps are meant to assist the family. The children are expected to work at home as well.

  104. Ncheta should concentrate more on teaching her kids to do domestic chores than scolding Ebuka; the silent treatment Kamsi played when he saw what was going on was wrong because it might give Ebuka an edge over her, he should have cautioned Ebuka first then go on to talk to his wife later as he did. Finally, if i were to be Ebuka i would concerntrate on my job, since there must be a reason to why I accepted the job .
    Lovely fiction ma.

  105. The husband was right but he should have cautioned the boy so that he will not think his above his mistress or right in disobeying her orders. Also, children should be taught to do somethings themselves and not always pampered.

  106. Well, I don’t understand why Kamsi should say that the wife go hire a girl and leave the boy. The boy no matter how right he is, isn’t supposed to raise voice at his employer not to talk more of outrightly disobeying her. If he has a problem with his work, he should let her know politely. Of what use is it to employ someone only to have him/her challenging your authority. She actually has the right to sack him. The boy is totally wrong. He might have some initiative but he lacks work ethics.

  107. Understanding each other in marriage helps to make a great home. A good woman should always listen to her husband’s advice and not trying to be stubborn like Ncheta. she is lucky to have a good husband like Karma who doesn’t want problem. Ebuka should know how to refer words to his madam because irrespective of his age, Ncheta is still his madam and even at that she is older than him. Interesting one ma.

  108. This write up is so interesting and it happens in some family where the man of the house faill to talk when necessary. Kamsi suppose to caution the boy, even though he is a boy but he should remember that he does not have equail right with ncheta who is legally married. if not that ncheta is calm enough, do you know that such a thing could make look for a way to sack the boy, she can even decide to use button power , anyway wise men are few.

  109. Peoples opinions should be entertained in some situations. Ncheta just wanted her opinions and instructions to be followed by Ebuka without excuses.
    Ebuka, as the houseboy shouldn’t be left with almost all the chores, the kids are meant to some little chores like washing dishes and
    their clothes, even if it takes washing them again.
    Domestic roles and issues are not the responsibilities of females but for both gender.

  110. Nice piece ma. Women are not to be seen as inferior to the opposite sex or to the development of the society. Well as for Ebuka I feel his right but his approach wasn’t cool. There should be an epitome of respect for every individual. I really laughed hard when Ebuka said”are we to wash them like clothes?” I enjoyed the story.

  111. I believe Ebuka is right. At the age of six the boys should learn to do some certain things by themselves. But Ebuka should learn to respect his madam and not treat her as inferior and the husband is not even helping matters.. That was an interesting piece!

  112. Kamsi was right about the children learning to do things themselves. Gender stereotyping is so prevalent in the society but Ebuka should learn to respect his boss as it’s the right thing to do whether male or female.

  113. Respect is reciprocal,as long as one works under someone,give him or her that respect and those that employ should treat the employee like a human being

  114. I don’t advice people to get house helps but if need be, treat him/her as your own child no matter where you got them.

  115. Very short and straight to the point..
    Kamsi did not do the right thing by not correcting Ebuka..
    Ebuka should learn manners because he will not know we’re his help will come from..

  116. Gosh!..I’m still laughing at ebukas response to bathing the kids three times daily…but mahn! That boys got guts- that I admire anyway!…the woman’s wrong to think that her children are still too young to bathe themselves,and the husband should please come to her aid,I think ebuka would listen to him better

  117. When it comes to issues like this, gender is not a qualification and that was what Kamsi should be made to understand. Nobody is totally wrong in this scenario just that the manner of opinion expression went bad, he should know that he is talking to his madam and should talk politely

  118. There should not be discrimination between males and females, both genders should command respect and be accorded one.

  119. This piece is two sided. It is wrong for a master to stereotype their help in a dehumanising manner. However, it is also wrong for the helps to be rude and disobedient to their masters. Secondly, i don’t buy the idea of a female help being less troublesome than their male counterparts.

  120. Madam should stop spoiling her children as it would affect them later in lire and alsalso she should recognise her houseboy as a man and not just give orders but there should also be respect from both parties…..Houseboy should also respectfully give suggestions…..God bless

  121. Quite an interesting story. Jamaica would have asked Abuja not to make suggestions in that manner by shutting him up, later on he can call his wife and advice her to minimize the way she gives instructions and command thanks.

  122. Respect they say is reciprocal. Madam should not put down houseboy because of his position. There are many ways to gain respect without being brute. Gender is never a deciding factor for respect. This story is quite an eye opener to some things most people don’t put into consideration.

  123. Very funny.ncheta does not need a female house help due to the wahala.issokay.Although the gender of a person does not determine respect.

  124. Even if you are a boy and employed by a woman to be a houseboy considering the fact that you have accepted the job , you must show respect to your boss .I also understand where kamsi is coming from because girls tend to obey their bosses more than the guys that want to be their own bosses. And yes children should learn how to do stuffs on their own because this will go as far as helping them to be independent in future.

  125. The husband is very wrong not to have come to the aid of the wife, although he has a point. In as much as I hate to say this, but it is actually a mans world. Ncheta should have gotten a female housekeeper, it would have been easier for her. Ebuka disgusts me by the way.

  126. Lolzz..in other to avoid trouble,and disrespect,don’t employ anybody, do your part and leave the rest for God

    • Ebuka was wrong in challenging his madam ..even tho he was making sense, he should learn to suggest things to people in a polite manner, plus he acts like someone that was raised in a home where women do majority of the chores ..also, I think ncheta didn’t take better actions to get him to act right, she should have cut his salary or fired him rather than arguing with him all the time

  127. This is a very interesting story! But kamsi ought to have corrected Ebuka when he was speaking to his wife in a rude manner

  128. Short and interesting story Ma, the man would have said something during the exchange but chose to keep quiet thereby giving the boy a sense that he was doing the right thing. For crying out loud this is between the houseboy and his wife not his wife and a friend, for me it’s disrespectful to top it all with his opinion that a female would have been better is really appalling so males can’t do domestic works too?

  129. There are many ways of pointing out things to People he shouldnt have reacted in that manner, the story is educative basically on mariage or marital problems

  130. Lol!!! Wash the kids like clothes, what a funny and interesting short piece, I feel Ncheta is being a bit too controlling and Ebuka is being too rude for his age. In all domestic work shouldn’t be reserved for females only

  131. Whether a male or a female as a help in the home is ok…everyone has different choices,I feel maybe ncheta created the space for their houseboy to talk to her anyhow..maybe he felt he did all the chores in the home so ncheta his madam had no right to boss him around, he also responded in a rude and arrogant manner if u ask me I mean Ebuka.

  132. the madam gave Ebuka that room to talk and respond to her in a rude manner. I love when the husband said she should give him some space.

  133. Ncheta is meant to know that Ebuka is a teenager and as a result of this he will want to do things his own way.
    She was rather too overbearing.
    She should let him bring up ideas on how chores will be done at home,it will save her more trouble.

  134. What a good story!! Ncheta’s comment “God forbid” when her husband advised for a female house help is illustrative. It shows that she don’t trust her husband. And to dictate every action of a man is not possible, madams should know that. Ma, thanks a lot for this story.

  135. The three characters played significant roles but that of Ebuka is indeed questionable. No matter the status or personality of one, humility is the source of all virtue. God bless you too ma. More strength to your arms

  136. The fact that young men stoop low and humble themselves to take some job that belongs to the female group doesn’t mean that they have thrown away their dignity. The condition of the country is a major factor. I think that boys and young men should be allowed to make some self decisions that will help them. It is one way to maintain their dignity, and restore the lost one

    • Sweetie, what are you talking about? What jobs belong to the female group? Housework is for everyone, male and female.

  137. As a saying goes ‘respect is reciprocal’. Every body should be given respect irrespective of their age. Ncheta should have given Ebuka the respect he deserved and not controlling him like a toy.
    I will also like to give this advice to every wife and mother and also the would-be mothers that they should be sharing their house chores among their children and the maids, not leaving it only for the maids. By so doing, there will be peace and unity in the house. Thank you, ma, for this. I really learnt something.

  138. I think that each of the three characters has his or her own weakness. Kamsi is supposed to say something when his wife was talking but he kept quiet. Only God knows when men will stop taking women as inferior creatures. For Ncheta, she is supposed to be patient knowing that Ebuka is now an adolescent which makes him to think twice when given any instruction. I think Ncheta does not need a female househelp. Maybe she is thinking that a girl may seduce her husband and verse versa. If I happen to be Ebuka, nothing will stop me from being patient and humble. Besides, I will not be a houseboy forever.

  139. this clearly shows that, sometimes, sheer force is not the answer. The two parties (Ncheta and Ebuka) are wrong in this case because, Ncheta is meant to allow Ebuka to give some suggestions in order to avoid power tussle, while Ebuka on his own part, is meant to be more respectful and obedient to his Madam. I can’t help but to feel inclined to support the reaction of Kamsi.

  140. A short yet deep story. Every employer of a maid should give that servant some ounce of respect. Ncheta just throwing commands at Ebuka and controlling him like a toy is not the proper way to do it. Also leaving the work for the servants and excluding the children will make them lazy and depend too much on others.

  141. Although Ebuka has a point, he is supposed to follow orders. Later he can gently suggest his opinion to his madam. As for Kamsi, he is supposed stick with his wife on this.

  142. Talking about the characters, I will say that kamsi has done the right thing he should do.even though he knows that Emeka is a houseboy he still realizes the fact that every body needs to be respected in his/her own accord.He suppose Emeka as a mature somebody who should not commanded but should be allowed to make decision.
    Coming to Emeka I will say that he is not suppose to exchange words with his madam, But I believe something must have pushed him to do that. It could that she detest the way his madam impose all the house work on him alone, even the one her mada’s children can do for their self.
    Coming to the to talk about Ncheta, she has to know that respect is reciprocal, so even though she is the madam she should note that Emeka also deserve respect, for everyone is equal before the Lord.
    May God continue to streanthen you as always fill us with your good right up ma.

    • Wow, that was a long one! Try to inculcate the habit of proofreading whatever you write. And who is Emeka? Lol!

  143. Ncheta shouldn’t be judged or her frustrations. This is because, one of her maim reasons for bringing in an house help is to help do the things she wants or has to do. For her to have directed Ebuka to bath the kids means that how she wants it done and it is expected of Ebuka to respect his mistress’ orders before complaints..
    And Ncheta should be commended for not resorting to maltreating Ebuka just to get him to Abide by her rules.

  144. One time, I made lunch at my grandparent’s house and served my junior brothers. After eating, my grandpa asked me to take their plates to the kitchen.
    “Your brothers need to rest after eating” were his exact words. I was so furious! All I could think about were retorts to his statement. Thankfully, my brothers took their plates to the kitchen before any drama could happen.
    Ebuka probably comes from a family where only the females do the house chores so he feels he is doing his madam a favour. Kamsi on the other hand, feels Ebuka is only acting naturally/ “being a man”.
    These are some of the subconscious ways patriarchy is preached/encouraged.
    When an employer instructs an employee, the employee can suggest better alternatives but that is where it ends – suggestions. It is up to the employer to either accept or reject these suggestions. The employee should carry out the boss’s wishes or resign.
    I blame Ncheta partly for Ebuka’s behaviour. If she cut his salary or replaced him, some sense would have returned to his head.

  145. this story teaches the youths especially men not to support their wives when they are making the wrong decisions as in the case of Ncheta and even though we are in authority we should not oppress others

    • Apparently, it was because Ebuka (the house boy) couldn’t fulfil all her demands at the specified periods that raged the troubles in the house. I mean the chores were clashing so he just had to follow his own scale of preference. So Ncheta should just calm down, reason and put herself in Ebuka’s shoes before sending him to do things appropriately. And for Ebuka, he should learn how to talk to his mistress or explain things or his inabilities & reasons to her in a mannerful manner instead of being arrogant.

  146. Me personal i dnt support this Idea of having a house help cause some are home breakers sometimes your children might end up lazy and not knowing how to do anything. Ncheta was sending Ebuka too much errands cause he is just a house help and he is under her, which is very wrong treat every body with respect and equally no matter the colour, status or race of the person. Ncheta was over pampering her kids by not allowing them do some basic chores like their clothes , she always sends Ebuka to do everything in the house, which is not a good home training for her kids. Thank you ma for this Educative post learnt alot from it.

  147. Even though Ebuka is supposed to be allowed to make decisions on his own, he still need to be guided my an adult. Kamsi shouldn’t have kept quiet and watch Ebuka insult his wife or be rude to her. He is meant be respectful and submissive, nt authoritative/defensive.Tnk u MA

  148. Ebuka the house boy, though smart, but he lacks manner of approach at his age I think he should be loyal, obedient and respectful to his Madam. But here he spoke rudely even though he was right. Ncheta the madam was wrong for over controlling, giving the little boy no chance to show his initiative. Coming to the husband Kamsi, he is right by advising the wife to give the boys some space but he is trying to say that females are the ones to be like maid while men should be giving some respect because of their gender

  149. I’d hate to sound like a feminist but this is a clear case of male thinking they cannot be governed by females, no matter the age or class factor. Ncheta was desperately trying to put her house in order and be the woman of the house and Ebuka was clearly thwarting her efforts by disobeying her at every turn. Her husband, Kamsi who should’ve supported his wife during Ebuka’s little display of stubbornness supported Ebuka instead, on the basis that Ebuka was a man who could not be controlled and getting a housegirl will be better if she doesn’t want her authority challenged. Although Ebuka is human and has the right to refuse to do some house chores, he shouldn’t challenge his madam and Kamsi shouldn’t give such a shallow reason for Ebuka’s reisitance to a higher authority.

  150. Inasmuch as we expect that Ebuka should be a loyal servant, even if he was 25yrs, we should not also forget that letting our kids do some things they can or should learn a particular age is tantamount their growth. Ebuka is not incorrect about children learning how to bath themselves at the age they are, his manner of approach notwithstanding. Thanks and God bless you, Aunty Edith.

  151. “Washing Kidd like cloths” this statement makes me laugh,children should learn how to take bath to themselve,I think Ebuka did not intend to abuse his madam, thanks for the story ma,I enjoyed it!

  152. We should always be submissive to people that are higher than us especially when we are under them, Ebuka is right on insisting that the children are of age to bath themselves,but it was so rude the way he approached it. In the other hand it is adviceable for parents to hand over some house chores to their children when they noticed they are of age to perform the activity instead of leaving everything for the servant . We should abide by the Bible passage which says” train up a child the way he should go, that when he grows up, he will not depart from it

  153. Well Ebuka is definitely a stubborn boy, nevertheless I see no reason why he shouldn’t obey his madam, however kamsi’s advice is a good one.

  154. Ebuka may be right in proving his point but that’s not enough reason to disrespect his superior. Ncheta should also give her little kids opportunity to do some things alone.

  155. Someone needs to talk sense to both the husband and the houseboy, just imagine how rude questioning the order of his madam that’s very wrong that houseboy needs to be sent away as soon as possible and the husband is also responsible for the bad attitude the houseboy is putting up he is in support of it all because he is a boy that’s way wrong.

  156. How Ebuka use to answer questions from his madam is rude and bad. He should have given Ncheta the respect she deserve notwithstanding his/her gender.
    Kamsi also wouldn’t have treated the matter that way. He needs to caution Ebuka as the man of the house.

  157. Males as a whole does not buy the idea of being turned and tossed around rather the do what they think is best to them and lay aside other ideas. This can be said to be the case of emeka that was why he kept on arguing with Ncheta and she could not lay a finger on him else he would revolt against her

  158. A houseboy talking back at his madam? It’s almost surreal, because I doubt how many women will tolerate that. Although I like the points the boy was making but I think he should have done so in a more polite manner. Nduka on the other hand should have at least saved his wife’s face instead of sitting back and doing nothing. Nice story, Ma.

  159. Ncheta decides to be bossy because she has a helped who is quite rude,ebuka was right in telling her that her boys can do certain thing at some age is true but it came out in a rude tone. if I was ebuka I’d saying it to Ncheta in a calm tone and if she decides to snub the idea I’d talk to Kamsi her husband.

  160. Nice write up ma! I agree with the message ncheta husband was trying to pass to her to give Ebuka some breathing space but what ncheta husband said about ncheta getting a female as a house girl instead of a male that statement was wrong.

  161. I will say Ebuka is not respectful to begin with because, he knows for sure that Ncheta is his boss and an elder for that matter,the way he responded to her was really rude and this is no matter of male or female gender. A respective person will always be respectful no Matter the gender.

  162. Male or female, it does not matter. Kamsi was wrong in saying that Ebuka was a man, respect should be shown to the wife as she is also his employer. But at the same time, she should also try to get her sons to work as it is also their duty.

  163. At age six and four those kids should be able to perform some chores in the house, that’s bad upbringing if they’re still seen as BABIES and not allowed to do anything. Not minding gender, Ebuka should not be acting that way to his Madam, keep gender aside first.

  164. Ncheta should have trained her kids in a better way in the sense that they can do some chores in the house,and no matter what ebuka is supposeuto be respectful to his madam

  165. Ebuka was wrong, he was hired in that house as a house help and not to come and be running mouth or uttering what his madam asks him to do because if she firers him,no one will question her but as a house help,he was being arrogant which was not right. Ncheta on her own part concerning the children, theres a point in children’ life you let them do things by themselves so they can learn and for kamsi he was wrong too at the point ncheta was cautioning her maid às her husband he should have joined her in cautioning him then in their closet tell her what he wanted to. We should all learn from this.

  166. I feel Ncheta shouldn’t be too hard on the boy, though the boy is meant to take orders from His masters without argument too. House helps this days want to control the home, the snap of finger above her head only meant one thing, the fear if having a female househelp who would probably snatch her husband. Women are jealous when it comes to their man. Nice piece ma.

  167. Firstly, Ebuka was rude to his madam, his reply to her sounded as a question rather than an answer which he had no right to since he is under her roof. Kamsi should have called the boy to order when he spoke rudely to his wife because it could happen next time. Madam also should not use work to kill the poor boy because he’s a houseboy and she should not spoil her boys as they are of age to start doing some chores in the house.

  168. Domestic work should not only be left for females, thats why some boys act as if they didn’t have any home training while growing up simply because they were considered boys and such is not to be done by them. And also at the age of six a child should be able to bath him or her self. Ncheta needs to step up and start teaching her children how to be independent because she might not be there forever giving them baths.

  169. Haha…. A funny piece. Ebuka is a man!!!
    But I think to some extent, he was rude to his madam. Ncheta should also learn to allow Ebuka express his own initiative at times. And I believe Kamsi handled the matter perfectly, except that he should have rebuked Ebuka (the man, hahaha) not to exchange words with his elders.

  170. Ebuka is definitely not respectful. Someone like my mum would never tolerate such.

    I really don’t get why Ncheta is having negative thoughts concerning a female housemaid. I see nothing wrong with it as king as she trusts her husband. To an extent, they can be more humble than males.

  171. The ebuka guy wasn’t polite with his suggestion, he should Accord his madam respect at all time no matter what. On the other hand, the kids are old enough to do somethings themselves.

  172. She should concentrate more on bringing up her kids to be independent,and besides Ebuka should be polite in the way he addresses his madam,the kids aged 6 and 4 are still very young to do certain things themselves.

  173. Lol it’s actually funny the way most people conclude house chores is for the girl children only, to me that’s a very weird mentality. I believe the madam has her reason for not employing a female house help that reason should be respected by her husband and not rub it on her face that she deserve no respect from her house help because of gender.
    My, opinion on this issue is that the boy should be put out of work if he doesn’t want to work, yes as long as he is taking salary he should be ready to take orders or he should be replaced

  174. The husband didn’t do well by supporting ebuka, even if he has to confront her wife, it shouldn’t be in front of ebuka because that will make him to be more disrespectful to the madam. Again children should be allowed to take some responsibility to avoid them being lazy when they grow up.

  175. This is not a matter of gender. As the Boss Ncheta have the right to order Ebuka to do whatever she wants, she pays him after all, so he have no right to be disrespectful to her.

  176. This is not a matter of gender. As the Boss Ncheta have the right to order Ebuka to do whatever she wants, she pays him after all, so he have no right to be disrespectful to her…

  177. Kai! The Kamsi sef didn’t try, I’m sure if he always called that boy to order once in a while he would be more obedient

  178. This story centers on what is supposed to be the duties of a man and a woman. She should take it easy on the boy but he is still to you g in my opinion to question someone he is under. I suggest they both reach a good understanding to avoid future problems.

  179. To me I will say that Ebuka is trying to fulfill one of the prophecys of the end time; which say ‘Children are going to be disobedient to parents and guidance’. To me I can’t even houses such an individual.Be in the shoe of
    Ncheta’s husband I would have sent back to his village people because he wasn’t well breastfeed

  180. I hardly think it proper that a house help should have the audacity to argue with his employer no matter how sound his argument is. Besides Kamsi’s behaviour was high inappropriate; he shouldn’t allow any one talk back to his wife like that, no matter how stupid the woman is. That’s my honest opinion. Thank you.

  181. To me I will say that Ebuka is trying to fulfill one of the prophecies of the end time; which say ‘Children are going to be disobedient to parents and guidance’. To me I can’t even houses such an individual. Be in the shoe of Ncheta’s husband I would have sent back to his village people because he wasn’t well breastfed

  182. First,this is typical in many homes. I see the woman scared of having someone take her husband away from her and so she prefers the headaches Ebuka would cause her than the heartache the female help might cause her.
    Seriously,if I was Kamsi, I would call Ebuka to order he should respect my wife as dissrespect to her is simply disrespect to me especially if it is done in my presence.
    Secondly, Ncheta being a lady that she is I see the nagging trait in her. If she insists her boys should bathe fifty times daily, I think it would save her the stress and her voice if she gets them to learn it themselves.
    Finally, talking back to your elders is not a good character so I was taught. Ebuka should learn from me.

  183. Interesting one.First,this is typical in many homes. I see the woman scared of having someone take her husband away from her and so she prefers the headaches Ebuka would cause her than the heartache the female help might cause her.
    Secondly, Ncheta being a lady that she is I see the nagging trait in her. If she insists her boys should bathe fifty times daily, I think it would save her the stress and her voice if she gets them to learn it themselves.
    Finally, talking back to your elders is not a good character so I was taught. Ebuka should learn from me.

  184. Just like Kamsi said, when someone is living with you don’t expect them to be acting like robots(probably, in obedience your everyday command), give them the opportunity to take decisions on their own.

  185. I seem to be the only one who fails to see a patriarchal conspiracy here.
    This is apparently a question of disrespect.
    Ebuka should have aired his thoughts with the respect due to his mistress and Kamsi shouldn’t have feigned disinterest while the argument went on.
    Let’s reverse the roles, if Ebuka were a young girl, it would have been accolades for her daring to be assertive in the face of a subjugating mistress, right?
    So there!

  186. What a nice advice from the husband. Houseboys and madams always seem to be having power struggle in most homes. Most times, the fault is from the madam. They always impose everything on the houseboys without considering whether the houseboys are happy about it.
    Women who have treated their houseboys with respect are the ones that have enjoyed the best services of the houseboys.
    Therefore, the better the madam treats their houseboys, the better they perform their duties

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