Stephen asked his cousin, Lexi, to go outside with him, ostensibly to show her the interior of his new VW Audi but actually to slip her some money. Unknown to him, Brenda, his wife was watching them from the living room window.

Ten minutes later, Lexi came back from the nearby eatery with a bowl of ice cream and some cupcakes. She had spent the entire N1,000 Stephen gave her. She sat on the Audi’s bonnet and began to eat while Stephen chatted with her.

Brenda had gone to check on her twins, Kachi and Buchi, chopping and blending ingredients in the kitchen but she was curious about what she had seen earlier. So she went to look out the living room window again and was scandalised by the sight before her. Unable to hold herself, she marched out to confront her husband.

(Related: Loyalty Wins)

“Sweetheart, what is going on here?”

“Nothing. We’re just taking some fresh air.”

“You know that is not what I’m talking about. What is she eating?”

Stephen didn’t like his wife’s tone. She was talking about Lexi like she wasn’t there and she wasn’t even using her name. But he didn’t want a fight, so he replied, “Looks to me like ice cream and cake. What does it look like to you?” Perhaps, a little humour will help. But Brenda wasn’t in a laughing mood.

“Why are you giving your cousin money to buy snacks when I’m about to cook?”

“About to cook! Brenda is almost noon. If Lexi is hungry, I don’t see why she shouldn’t do something about it. But you’re wrong … I didn’t give her any money.”

“Come on, honey, I saw you give her some money.”

“Spying on me now?”

“No, but I wonder why you felt it necessary to bring her outside to hand it over. You obviously knew that what you were doing was wrong.”

“No, I just wanted to prevent this particular argument we’re having now.”

“Your 17-year-old cousin who does not do any chore in the house cannot wait for food on a Saturday morning. You have to send her out for pastries. Is she that delicate or you just want to show that she is more important to you than me and our kids, as young as they are?”

“She is not more important than you guys. She’s just not used to your boot camp approach to life.”

“I don’t care whether she’s been living in the lap of luxury her whole life. If she’s going to stay here while studying on campus, she has to adapt to our lifestyle. There’s even nothing unusual about what we’re doing here. Housecleaning is done on Saturday mornings and everyone needs to pitch in. I won’t have the twins waiting on her hand and foot when there’s an eight-year gap between them. And you don’t spend on her like this again. If she doesn’t like it here, she should call her multimillionaire dad, your uncle, to set her up somewhere else in the style she’s accustomed to.”

(Related: Knowing When Enough is Enough)

As Brenda walked back to the house, Lexi started crying and Stephen sprang to hold and comfort her. A few minutes later, he followed his wife back into the house while the twins darted from the back door to join Lexi. He met Brenda completing the dusting of the furniture she was at before the whole drama began.

“Darling, that was an awful display you put on out there. And what makes you think you can give me an ultimatum like that?”

“The ultimatum, as you choose to call it, is for your cousin,” Brenda replied as she straightened up. Not one to be idle for a minute, she began fluffing up and repositioning their throw pillows.

[bctt tweet=”This #story illustrates how we can govern the tempers often charged by #family life.” username=”edithohaja1″]

“Maybe it’s time for things to change around here. None of us is finding it easy at all. When you’re in the zone, as you often are, you are scarier than a drill sergeant. I think it’s time you focused on being a wife and mother.”

“I like the house to be run efficiently. I can’t have some stranger coming in and upsetting the order I’ve established here.”

“Look, I appreciate what you are doing but you just need to cut us some slack sometimes. I’m not saying this because of Lexi. She’ll only be here for a while. I’m saying it for me and the twins.”

“You want a little slack, but everyone gets to help out when there’s work to be done?”


“Including Lexi?”

“Including Lexi.”


(Related: Either SUV or Burst!)

Stephen’s next move took his wife by surprise. He closed the distance between them in quick strides and scooped her up into his arms. After he’d planted a kiss on her left temple, he tried to turn her around for more but she wriggled free and ran into the kitchen. He chased after her and collided with the kitchen table upending the tray of ingredients the twins had prepared.

“There goes your breakfast!” He went and opened the front door. “Come on, everyone, get ready. We’re eating out,” he announced.

The twins, who had been eating with Lexi, squealed in delight. The younger of the two, Buchi, grabbed the ice cream bowl and bolted indoors. The older, Kachi, wanted to pursue him but Lexi offered her the last cupcake. They both went in to prepare for their outing.

“Hi!” Brenda threw to Lexi as she came to drop the paper bag the cakes came in into the trash can in the kitchen.

“Hi!” Lexi replied.

“We better hurry or your cousin will make us walk.” The same guy who just called me a drill sergeant!

“Yes,” Lexi replied, remembering how she and Brenda walked to church the previous Sunday for being late. She smiled and they both rushed towards their bedrooms.

-The end-

Ⓒ Edith Ugochi Ohaja 2017

[bctt tweet=”Brenda’s Ultimatum is #flashfiction about the give and take that #family life requires.” username=”edithohaja1″]

Would love to hear from you.

You’ve probably seen disagreements and arguments in your own family. Care to give us an example (what it was about and how it was resolved)?

Do you have any “drill sergeant” in your family? What do you like and what do you dislike about their behaviour?

Do you have any Lexis among your siblings or cousins? How do you relate with them? (If you’re a Lexi yourself, tell us how you get along with others.)


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  • Always a pleasure to read your writing and be challenged! I am the drill sergeant in our household! I am the Martha and need more Mary moments. Thank you for this reminder to slow down and take time to be with the Lexi’s in my life!

    • Edith Ohaja

      So glad to have you here, Sarah! Some of us need a little bit of Martha to prevent everything around us going to the dogs. Blessings on you and your family in Jesus’ name.

  • lacyngo

    Love how you told a story to make us think


    Lolzzzzz.YES there is indeed palaver in every family.Brenda managed it well and thank God for her husband who understood the type of woman he married.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Yes,,my dear! In some families, minor issues escalate into major fights from day to day because of lack of understanding. God bless you!

  • bschreurs23

    This sounds like my husband and I.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Praise God! And blessings on you and your family, Brittany!

    • Venessa Stephen

      Family life is full of drama,so much drama but what is most important is how they tackle the issue, it is not advisable to let arguments or grudges to linger.
      In a relationship,one person must be fool for it to be successful.I admire how Stephen corrected his wife with love , that’s worthy of emulation.

  • Ogbu Gloria

    Wow…this is a very smart and brilliant way of settling family problems…Thank God for Stephen’s wisdom. I really love this story.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Thank God indeed! Instead of focusing on his wife’s seeming dislike of his cousin, he addressed the underlying problem: her rigid way or running their home. The wife too gave in without gragra. May God grant us the wisdom to work for peace with those we relate with in Jesus’ name.

  • A good one again. You really do fascinate me with your stories. What a nice way to settle a family dispute! This is a home with mutual understanding and respect.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Glory to God, my dear! Anything at all can lead to a nasty and prolonged quarrel when the people involved are stubborn, disrespectful and unkind. None of us is perfect. We should need to find ways of living harmoniously with one another. God bless you richly in Jesus’ name.

  • euniprecious

    In a family, misunderstanding must come from any party but the solution to that is understanding. once either of the parties can understand and tolerate, peace will exist. Hmmm, thnk God Stephen understands.

  • Ugama Gloria Nkechinyere

    This story is so fascinating, such a family that knows how to control themselves when angry is so ideal. What a happy home!!!

    • Edith Ohaja

      Wish all homes were like that but alas, people can quarrel over the most insignificant things and keep at it like forever.

  • Ugama Gloria Nkechinyere

    Wow! I love how Stephen took control of the matter by calming Brenda down. Stephen is a cool and matured man. Not all women are lucky to have a man like Stephen. I love this story. It’s a nice one.

  • Ibeh chiamaka

    I think married couples should read this story. It’s a nice story. I learnt from that we should not always take little matters to heart. We should learn how to handle and take control of issues the way Stephen did.


    Very educating story which could take one’s mind back home
    This is a very illustrative way on how to settle family issues instead of involving the whole “Umunna” as Igbo’s would call it

    I remember a day at home when father n son had a disagreement
    mom was the middle woman. I just watched as the story unfolded right before my very eyes. Was a scene though but at the end, books were closed and bad records erased.

    Drill sergeant at home is dad…..fear him!

    Am the Lexi at home. most times, issues are raised but dad waves it aside

    • Edith Ohaja

      Bless you, Chinonye! There’s bound to be friction and issues cropping up when people stay together. We just need to remember that we are called to be peacemakers.

  • Orji Chidiebube Prudence

    Yes o… We have a Lexi in our home… She used to be the last born until surprisingly, our number was increased. She still has this last born mentality… Hates work and falls sick when one is imposed on her… This attitude of hers irritates me, I believe all is pretense and so I make her do things as she ought.. She doesn’t have to be told anymore.. Cos she knows I’ve got my eyes on her… This story, though meant for couples, teaches patience and accommodation to all… More inspiration, Ma.


    Nice one aunty. I will say that sometimes I am the drill sergeant not every time though. Seriously she was harsh out there.

    • Edith Ohaja

      In a way, yes. But I prefer people who speak their mind like that to those who keep quiet and bear a grudge. At least, you know where you stand with the former and can tell what they want/how to fix a rift. Pretending and keeping malice at home is bad but we should still air our grievances with respect.

  • Okemiri ifunanya Diana

    This story is very mature it reminds me of some issues that due occur in some homes whereby when relatives visit their aunt or uncle there is always an argument is either the woman will be against what the man wants or the other way ,but in this aspect the man handled it in a way that shows that he is educated.thank God peace at last.

  • Ologhofor Sampson

    Understanding in marriage matters a lot and that was the key Stephen used to bring back peace in his home. Although issues come up at any time at home but the most important thing is how to manage them. Bless you ma.

  • JayJay

    Our last child is a typical “Lexi” .he’s been around for just 13years and he throws tantrums all the mum always has to give him ultimatums to get him to do anything at all.He simply hates chores. I believe he’ll change.he’s just a work in progress right now!Thanks for sharing this family story ma!!

    • Edith Ohaja

      Yes, people do change. When some responsible people tell us of the trouble they frequently got into when they were young, we find it hard to believe. So we need to be patient with the young. God bless you superbly, Jay!

  • Stephen was mature in the way he handled the situation.


    couples should know how to manage their family crisis in such a way that it won’t cause trouble. loving this story.


    Having a Lexi in the family can really be frustrating but it is always good to approach them with love and they will come to thier senses.

  • Nathalie Ukwu

    Lol when it’s time to clean up, all hands must be on deck. Acting like Lexi would ruin your weekend because of all the silent treatment you’ll be getting thereafter. Everyone at home has a bit of sergeant material in them I guess 🙂

  • Eme Samuel Ewa

    Not only in Brenda’s family.Almost in every home there are misunderstanding and disagreement.Only those that cherish God’s principles set out in the bible allow it to guide them.

  • Sylvia Ugwoke

    In marriage, husband and wife are supposed to understand each other and cooperate in order to have a peaceful home.

  • Agu Ginika Rebecca

    The family is indeed the smallest and important unit of the society and as such help to inculcate moral principles and ideas that tend to shapen the lives of its members. The older members are often seen trying to imbibe these in the lives of its younger members but in doing so, they should employ a proper way so that the younger members don’t feel bad, as shown by Brenda who frowns at her husband’s cousin Lexi for always appearing non chalant about house chores. She may appear right in doing that but the manner she goes about achieving that or emphasizing on collective involvement in keeping the house clean nearly brought misunderstanding between her and her husband including Lexi who felt hurt by her approach.
    There should always be mutual understanding, love, respect and a way of settling certain differences between couples amicably to ensure that the required peace and unity can still be restored in the family.

    Well done, Ma…

  • wow this story is striking. this kind of thing happens in most homes, and to the glory of God in mine, we handle it with love just like Stephen did.

  • Ekpali Joseph Saint

    i must appreciate the actions of Stephen.. he understood his wife and settled everything amicably.. nice story MA

  • Victoria Nonike

    this used to be my family when i was much younger,the family order and organization Brenda created and tried to maintain was my mom’s way of keeping her sanity intact because running the home was a full time job, coupled with the fact that she was also working. i can relate with Brenda’s annoyance as regards her husband’s action, if the issue wasn’t trashed out, Lexi would have begun to see her in a bad light, without understanding the reasons for her actions. In all, there should be room for compromise, it goes a long way. Good job ma!

  • Okonkwo chidimma benita

    I love the way it ended. I am the drill sergeant in the house. Lol. But brenda’s attitude towards her husband and his cousin doesn’t speak well of trying to put everyone in order. She is lucky to have married someone like stephen who understands what a good marriage is.

  • Okereke chukwuemeka

    Okayooooo. I will say this though. I hate to see that when home chores are done, then someone will instead of helping out turn it to be his or her leisure time for doing all sorts of things that will not help at all. Truly, I will lash out, I would be so mad at that person at that point in time as Brenda was. But it’s so good to know that after being mad,she still kept it together and had a healthy relationship with her. Kudos to Stephen for handling the situation and not allowing it escalate..

  • maduebo ifunanya blessing

    lolz! in every family there are usually misunderstandings. hmmm, that is a very interesting way to settle disputes between couples in their various homes. all the quyz reading this should learn ooo. this is a nice one, God bless you ma.

  • Ibute kosisochukwu nina

    Wow!!! Am falling in love with Stephen… Loves the way he tackled the problem… Anyway the story is interesting.

  • igboecheonwu prisca

    A very good story for both the married and unmarried. Having self control and understanding is what sustains and keeps people’s marriage.

  • Okoh Daniel

    family will always have its ups and down; but theyshould be settled as they occur. Love the story.

  • Ogota Jennifer Adaeze

    communication, respect, understanding, forgiveness and humility are solid grounds where peace can thrive in a family. kudos to the man of the house.

  • Nkiru Amaechina

    In every marriage, the couple need to understand each other. Stephen was very mature in the way he handled the issue. Nice story, ma!!

  • Atudume Blessing Chinwendu

    Yes ooo am the drill sergeant in my family, my mum often gives me a thumbs up on how i try to put things in order because i have very lazy siblings. The ability to make things fall back in place is an amazing part of a drill sergeant other than carrying a long face all day.
    the story is lovely and outstanding.

  • Akumambila ijeoma Winifred

    Lovely story! What a nice family that can control their anger when temptation comes their way.

  • Fidelis Favour Chiamaka

    The drill sergeant in my family is my mum☺. She loves it when we keep to her rules. At times, i feel like she is too controling.Well, the Lexi in my family is the last born. He won’t do anything at home, we don’t get along well because when he refuses to do anything at home, I will have to do it myself and it can be very tiring.

  • Ezenwa Obinna G.

    Sometimes such disagreement arise between couples in families. It takes a sense of maturity to handle them. Nice one

  • Njoku Chioma Grace

    misunderstandings are bound to arise in every family but it takes a whole lot of understanding, maturity and compromise to be able to settle them. i love the fact that Stephen did not scold his wife in the presence of Lexi and the fact that he was still able to settle with his wife amicably showing that they both loved and understood each other.

  • Aneke Modesta Chinemerem

    What a lovely home, It is true that misunderstanding and problem is prone to come in every family but what matters most is how well were they able to be resolved? Stephen is just a typical example of a good husband,kudos for him!

  • onoh chiazo johanness

    I just learnt a thing or two from this story ,love and understanding matters a lot in our homes and I am happy I read this thank u ma

  • Ene Kosisochukwu Zita

    The message is very clear. And it’s deeprooted in the family leadership. Governance that is good begins at home as extracted from the story of Stephen and his family. Family organization is the bed on which the success of leadership lies. It will be beguiling solving family problems by looking inwardly. This is a beautiful concept rare as a gem coming from this blog. The family journey maybe hard but members of the house’s lust for happiness should be definite. A lesson to teach before success in any society. For success is equal to happiness. Meaning a happy home is a successful home.

  • Ani Chiamaka Theresa

    Nice one ma!! This is so real to me cos in every family, there must be someone who hates house chores like Lexi, u always feel cheated wen u work and another person z jhs there to enjoy……..there should be division of work to avert dz kind of situation though misunderstanding in inevitable in a family but wen duties are specified, it goes a long way in controlling that…..kudos to Stephen for settling the problem amicably..

  • ohakwe oluchi judith

    some relatives are something else they will come to your house expecting everything without doing anything. Brenda is courageous i love the way she expressed herself…The way Stephen handled the matter shows that he is mature and loving…

  • Otti Uzoma Augusta

    We had a similar issue some years back, when two of my mum’s nephews and two of my dad’s nephews had to stay with us for the duration of their post utme. It wasn’t funny at all but it ended well and having read this story I think it is because neither of my parents were drill sergeants.

  • Ibe Okwukwe Emmanuella

    There is nothing as wonderful as understanding in your home. You have to learn to understand those around you in order to have a happy life. Thanks a lot Ma, I was really educated by reading this.

  • Agi Comfort Obahi

    Brenda took the issue too far she should have spoken to her husband in private but am really happy the issue didn’t go further after some shenanigans with her husband…. Not easy to stay with sister-inlaws though they always expect u to carry out all the chores.. Nice Ma

  • Nonike Victoria N.

    the important thing here for me is to understand that people are not the same. As a mother, Brenda needs to understand that and know how to treat each person accordingly so as to avoid situations like this. most times, this drill sergeant behaviour is needed as it ensures order in the home.

  • Chinemerem Onuorah

    I am a ‘Lexi’ ?. Though I only like to clean. But never ask or expect me to help cook or wash. No, thank you. But my mum, the drill seargent, will bundle me into the kitchen and make me do all those. Somebody cannot even be lazy in peace again. (Joke! ?)
    Thank God for how Stephen handled the situation. This greatly captured domestic life. Thanks, ma!

  • Awoke Isaiah Kelechi

    people born with silver spoons find it hard to adapt to new changes, just like the case of Lexi, in case we come across such people, they should be handled with care.


    Some people think that the way to make a guest feel at home or welcome, is to unreasonably pamper him/her. It is wrong, at least Brenda proved that although in rather open manner. She ought to have done it discreetly. Stephen’s introduction of love play in almost the middle of the fracas is awesome and bespeaks of maturity and tactics. Husband and Wife should be in good rapport so as to triumph against any possible challenges

  • Edeh cynthia oluomachi

    I love the way Stephen handled this situation…… communication and understanding is the key to a successful relationship… this is a nice one you are the best ma….

  • onyeabor ijeoma Rita

    we sure do have a drill sergeant in the house, that is my immediate elder sister, she is the son, brother we never had, she doesn’t take nonsense from anybody be you who, she fights for her nine sisters and parents, she has even involved in a physical combat with a guy in the village who used to torment my life, and reduced him to a chaff. hahhahahaha i cant forget the day she chased four titled men away from the house with a machet for trying to talk my father into getting a new wife. yea i admire her so much because she is ready for the outcome of whatsoever, am proud to have her as a sister.

  • udeh blessing

    I think every home has a ‘lexi’, but in my own home,am always the drill sergeant!!! Thank God for Stephen’s understanding and the grace that gave Brenda that type of man.

    • Edith Ohaja

      I love the acknowledgement that it’s grace that brings good things into our lives. You are lifted in Jesus’ name.

  • izukah chinonso favour

    This piece is really interesting….I really love the “Stephen”character …I wish all men are that way.the truth is we women to an extent don’t know that we are somehow trouble personified but it takes a gentleman who understands that no matter what a woman is always a woman and the ability to be calm when they are in their heated period.
    Thumbs up ma!

  • Analike Vivian

    If all men can learn to console and deal with their wife’s attitude the very way Stephen did, I wonder why we should be having series of breakups and divorce… Then as for the wife, it’s not really rude telling a v IP sited cousin to join in house chores but the way she actually did, was very rude and uncalled for
    Therefore, thumbs up there Stephen for his manly intervention and understanding

    Thumbs up to u too @edithohaja

  • Onwuania adaora

    In every family including mine, there is always a misunderstanding, it is important to handle every issue with maturity like Stephen did.





  • ifeoma mordi

    I understand how men are solely the main contributor in spoiling a child while growing up but wen the child is grown and finally spoilt its the woman’s fault? Lexi a 17 year old outside licking icecream, while her aunt is in the kitchen cooking? Amazing! Everybody should have just had icecream for breakfast nah.

  • Rachael Obiora

    i really love this story. first the reaction of Brenda. i like it because if she had not said anything lexi will not join in the house chores and also the approach of the husband towards the wife is wonderful not raising his voice because it would have caused a big problem in the house. i like the family there is respect and understanding.

  • nwafor chukwudalu franklin

    the story is very nice and interesting. reminds me of how tough my mother can be sometimes but still she loves us and everything she does is to make us better.

  • Egwuonwu Priscilla

    I really loved this story because i had no idea of what would happen next, suspense filled I’d say. I never imagined that Brenda would later become so understanding. Nice story

  • Vanessa Ezenwafor

    Lol. This reminds me of home. How my mum would share out various chores on pieces of paper, fold them and make us pick our work in turns. She’s indeed the drill sergeant. You have no reason to dodge work
    Stephen is just the ideal man for her. We thank God for wisdom and understanding. Something as little as that could as much as lead to divorce in some families. Nice piece Ma!!

  • Ndubuisi Uchenna

    Stephen really knows how to make peace and ease up his wife despite her boot camp approach to life


    ‘What is good for the goose is good for the gander’! It’s good he took everyone out so that they will all feel loved. Besides, I think we should all learn how to adapt to situations when we go to places and meet things different from the way they are in our various homes because in it lies a sense of maturity. If Lexi had adapted, he wouldn’t have had much difficulty copying with her uncle’s family.

  • Ewa Chiamaka

    stephen understood the kind of wife he married and settled the whole matter.. really nice and encouraging

  • Mokogwu Josephine

    Benda is too hard on Lexi,although she is a right to an extent.Stephen is just been nice to his cousin not spoiling her and as for Lexi she is just a good girl trying to blend into the family,Stephen was extremely smart to handle the situation


    Understanding is key to a healthy relationship and marriage. Nice story

  • Ene Esther

    This story reminds me of how my younger sister tries to dodge house work. The fact that Brenda was able to say what she thought about Lexi not helping with the housework was mature and the way Stephen handled it was commendable. It shows a level of understanding between the two.

  • Ikenna Precious

    I really love this story, ma, it’s enlightening. But I think in Lexi’s case, she should learn to adjust. As humans we have the capability to adjust to new surroundings and situations, so the idea of adjusting to Brenda’s rules doesn’t sound bad to me.

  • Ekeh chioma Jennifer

    And that’s what I call understanding and conversing. Without these two in a relationship, nothing tends to work out well. And The Stephens got it all. Kudos ma.

  • Faith Attih

    In my home, we’ve had disagreements, but the main drill sergeant in the house is my dad, he tries his best to make everything fall in place. There’s no particular Lexi in my home, there are times all of us will be lazy (from dad to the last born) and times we’re all up and doing, it all depends on the mood. The story is realy inspiring.

  • Oleru Precious

    I really love the way Stephen handled the situation. This is because he understood his wife.

  • Rahman Peace Taiye

    The drill sergeant in my house would be my elder sister. She cannot stand to see even a cup out of place. She yells at us just to get the work done and if you aren’t interested in cleaning with others, she firmly but gently, pushes you out of the house. Lol. I’m not in support of Stephen giving his niece money to get something to eat while preparation for cooking is underway. But I like the way he handled the situation at the end. It shows that he really understands his wife.

  • Luke chinyere

    This is interesting and honestly I know how it feels for one to do all the chores in the house and then your cousin or visitor just sits and relaxes expecting you to finish up and call her to break bread with the rest of the family. I think the man applied wisdom by agreeing to let Lexi do some of the home chores alongside his wife and children. Nice one, ma’am!

  • Opara Stella Chidindu

    Brenda seems to be an upright woman and i am glad her husband knows how to calm her down. this story reminds me of my elder sister LOL.

  • Adonu Ifeanyichukwu B

    Beautiful write up. I love the way Brenda spoke to the husband candidly even before the little cousin to drive home her point. The way they both handled the issue afterwards and it outcome was also nice…I enjoyed it.

  • Igwe Joshua

    Understanding breeds a successful relationship between partners as Stephen and Brenda can attest in this short story. It is good for a husband and wife to know the easy way to settle dispute amongst themselves and still maintain love in their family.

  • Nnorom Wisdom

    I guess what Brenda has in terms of a marital relationship is the dream of girls like me.
    I doubt that being hard would affect anybody, besides everyone needs a little discipline sometimes.

  • Ugwu Chiamaka Peace

    Nice one ma. No family is without issues but what matters the most is how those issues are being ironed out. The family is not a place to showcase anger,temper or to bear grudges. If Stephen had approached the matter differently, there probably would have a whole drama which could result to other unnecessary things. Also,Brenda and Lexi were softhearted enough to talk to each other just after the yelling… That’s how a family should be.

  • Ikwuakam Oluchi Francisca

    Wow, Stephen is really a wonderful man who knows how best to handle different situations. His actions are far from what just any man would do, his matured sense of reasoning came to play and I’m happy he handled the situation in the best possible way. A good one ma

  • Ogbodo somtochukwu ikemefuna

    There z nothing up or right abwt Brenda.. .She was jux jealous and insecure….
    Am praying I will not marry someone like her ooo
    Bt obviously, d man knows her so very much (starting from his first move to go outside with Lexi)
    It’s dz kind of wife dt will not allow u to take good care of ur own mother. .
    Let call a spade a spade.. .
    She was wrong. … .I dnt see any point hiding it.. .Dia was nothing wrong with buying tinx 4 ur cousin . .She was jux insecure ,dts all

  • obidigbo ifunanya Nino

    Misunderstanding is inevitable in every family the solution is to adjust and respect evey one opinion. Thank you ma for the post.

  • Ugwuda Mathew Ejike

    Wow! This is a nice story. This is a simple way on how to settle family issues instead of involving the whole villagers. Stephen is really a wonderful man who knows how to handle different situations.

  • Ugwoke ifechukwu Melvina

    Lol.. Yes there is a drill Sergeant in my family and that’s my mom. She likes to run a tight ship and mess ups are not allowed. Stephen is a very patient man who knows how to defuse an argument. I love this post, thanks a lot ma.

  • Oleighibe Oluebube Tessy

    Lexi in my family? No way, Mama would hit it off you. Though, I have Lexi as a Cousin, she didn’t last long with us (my family) she just stayed for two weeks, she couldn’t cope then she left….
    Power to Brenda’s understanding Husband (Stephen) who settled things with the wife without a fight or long argument because some husband would mistake Brenda’s action as being too disrespecting or commanding.

  • Nwabuike onyinyechi

    Brenda was a bit uptight but Stephen did well in explaining things to her and making her see reasons with him. All family have their ups and downs so Stephen did well in conversing and reasoning with her.

  • Ezeudu Chioma

    Interesting story, the man is indeed the head of the house, i admire the way Stephen handled the situation immediately without allowing it to escalate. There will be family problems but the main thing is how they are resolved to make way for peace, love and unity… Nice story

  • Nwata Blessing Chinyere

    This is fascinating and educating. At home, I’m the ‘drill sergeant’, I expect things to be done at the right time without excuses. And our last born is the ‘Lexi’ in the house. It is really, really frustrating…most times you have to scream your head off before she does a single chore at home. Thanks for my dad who’s always there to help stop the misunderstanding from lingering.
    Thanks ma for this interesting story.

  • Gerald

    The marriage experience is never without occasions of misunderstanding, quarrels ;that spices up the experience, entirely. However, it is important that couples learn how to quell these misunderstandings whenever they erupt.

  • Kalu Divine ogechi

    Arguments happens all the time in the family and outside the family but it shouldn’t be a barrier to being a drill sergeant when necessary because most times when you keep quiet on some issues, you might be taken for granted but as long as those problems are settled and not allowed to escalate, I believe they are normal..thank you ma for the wonderful post..

  • Ayigbo Chineme Edna

    I believe that in every family, there is always a Brenda but it is advisable for them the drill sergeant to take it easy. I love how Stephen struck a deal with Brenda and of course the way Lexi didn’t brood over the way her cousin’s wife shouted at her.

  • Theresa

    Wow!!! An interesting read… I actually loved how everything was later resolved sha… The happy ending.. I wld say I’m the Lexi in d house sha and I most times use my ulcer ailment to escape the Saturday clean up.. Lols, although i think my Mum has found out sha..
    Nice one Ma

  • Ezugwu Ogochukwu

    In every marriage they must be a misunderstanding but wnt matters is how you settle the problem.
    Stephen was able to settled the misunderstanding in a matured way knowing how his wife behaves.

  • Eze levi

    No family is devoid of problem. The main issue is learning how to control the situations in the family. I really commend Stephen for the action he took instead of applyimg aggression like many other men would have.

  • Joseph joy

    Nice one again,that’s a unique way to settle problem in a a every responsible family there should be a mutual understanding between them . Nice ?

  • Unwana Ekere

    Lexi’s type is just everywhere, i think my brother belongs there too, always wanting to eat snacks even without doing anything,its sometimes annoying tho.
    As for stephen, he is a great and matured,he resolved the issue with great ease because of his good virtue.
    As for Brenda, you did what you think was right and thabk God u responded to stimuli when Stephen kissed because some ladies will just be forming boss lady.
    The story is just to intresting ma.
    I pray we all find a husband that is soft, caring and mature

  • Nwele Euphemia Uzoamaka

    My dad is the drill sergeant in the family, Lexi’s … they’re quite much around me, but in my case they don’t influence the weight been carried along. Nice one ma
    I admire your creative ability

  • Njoku chiamaka Constance

    Brenda was right, one should contribute and give helping hands when you are in another person’s roof. The couple resolved their issues well without letting it linger for long.

  • Alexis Okoye

    Well, the attitude put up by Brenda is not strange because it is common to some few women out there .The husband acted like a man which shows that he is carrying out his responsibilities effectively as the head of the house with caution and mood moderation towards solving the problem that came up.There is a huge lesson to capture from this story which is the ability of a man to build up a cheerful home with such a diplomatic concept of approaching and tackling family issues and misunderstanding.

  • Sunday Ezekwesiri Daniel

    Thank God for a better understanding between the couples. The sure handled the issue properly not hurting anyone or extending the argument. There should be division of labour in the family. Work shouldn’t be left for one person only. Nice one ma.

  • Nnamani Eunice chiidnma

    Stephen really knows how to make peace and ease up his wife despite her boot camp approach to. In every marriage there must be one problem or the other.. Your ability to settle this problem within yourself makes your marriage better.

  • I like that Brenda was willing to compromise and make a deal that would endure peace in the house for everyone and not try to pitt her husband against his cousin. Nice story!

  • Amaefunah Angel

    It is very good to marry an understanding husband,thats why Brenda was lucky. and with God her marriage was blessed.

  • Nwosu chinwendu favour

    Lovely story!
    One thing to expect in every family is issues,then it becomes a problem when we allow it to linger.Stephen is a wise man… Brenda did the right thing, it is good to discourage laziness.

  • Edet Elijah

    I like the way Brenda took the bull by its horn if she didn’t , some of these nonchalant attitudes Lexi was exhibiting would have grew more annoying . We should always speak out when we see something wrong happening no matter how close you are with such people.

  • Onah Chiamaka Geraldine

    I must confess, this is so much like my own family. My mum actually behaves like Brenda because she doesn’t take nonsense from anyone but my dad always have a way to calm her down. Brenda is lucky to have an understanding husband that can quench fire instead of adding fuel

  • Precious

    Understanding is very important in a family
    Although issues come up at any time at home but the most important thing is how to manage them.
    A family that understands themselves lives forever because they knows how to handle each situation that comes up

    God Bless you ma

  • Dorcas Philip

    Definitely my mum “drill inspector”… Then I think I’m d sergeant- lol!..she like chores being done timely and effectively and accurately. U get to do it over again when its not properly done

  • Onovoh Adaeze J.

    There is nothing like maturity in handling marriage problems. Brenda and her husband, Stephen handled the situation maturely and it turned out well.

  • Okorie Adaora Nneoma

    Brenda has every right to do what she did because a home should be ran efficiently with every member of the house being up and doing…….Steve handled the matter with a matured mind although he almost flopped by giving Lexi money that morning to get pastries when her aunty was in the kitchen with the twins……Understanding in the family matters a lot.

  • Morgan Joy

    This story is very captivating. It is humorous as well as lesson-filled. Family can be a bit overbearing at times but you can’t help but feel the love. I enjoyed everybit of Brenda’s ultimatum.

  • Ukwueze oluchi benedette

    This story is indeed educative which everyone needs to read for Peace and love to always reign in the family . This kind of thing have happened in my family but thank God it was settled immediately just like Stephen did for Peace to reign.

  • Egbukwu ogechi

    This is really an interesting and educating write-up.rid on ma!!in everything, let love lead peacefully

  • Martins Kingsley Tobechi

    I have some Lexi in the family and it is so hectic relating with them as they are so annoying and nonchalant

  • Stephen is in deed the head of the house, that which he show case in resolving the issue that arose, instead of inviting outsiders. Hence we should learn from him

  • Nneji Nary Chinenye

    Nice write up, you were able to entertain and educate us at the same time compelling us to look into our lives, that’s beautiful.

  • Onoyima juliet

    Brenda managed it well and thank God for her husband who understood the type of woman he married

  • Nnadozie Judith chidimma

    Wow……….this is really an interesting and educating story that helps to control conflict in a home. It is natural that in every marriage, there must be misunderstanding and what settles the matter is the ability of the couples to understand and tolerate each other.

  • Nnadozie Judith chidimma

    There is always misunderstanding in every marriage and relationship but the matter is how you solve and handle the case. I really learnt something from this thank you ma

  • Aleke Juliet

    Thanks for this realistic story Ma. Is good that Stephen and Brenda ended up understanding each other which is very very important between couples because I personally feel good whenever I see my parents haven quarrelled some minutes ago, are seen gisting and laughing. LET LOVE LEAD!!!

  • Modupe

    the way the situation was been handled by the couple shows maturity and the understanding that exist between them. if only those who are in a relationship could understand each other, I believe that there will be a decrease in the number of break up and homes.

  • Afunanya Chiamaka Lilian

    Stephen really showed maturity on how he handled the case In every marriage or relationship there must always be misunderstanding but What matters is how the issue is resolved at last, every couple should be able to understand eachother just as Stephen and Brenda had done in the story. Thanks so much for that wonderful and educative story MA.

  • Achugwo Larissa

    Our last born (aka the usual ‘Lexi’ in every family) never did his share of house work. In short, Saturdays were ‘Tom and Jerry- starring the Achugwos’. I got tired of it all and tried a different approach. I and my other brother would work together while talking and laughing, and ‘Lexi’ would watch TV. After a while, I’d secretly switch off the power or NEPA would do the favour. He’d try to join the conversation and we’d tell him it was “workers only”. When we eventually let him in, we’d ask him bring to bring this or arrange that until we got him to fully join in.
    House chores done with family is a great way to bond. Stephen handled the situation nicely but that will not make Lexi automatically change and start loving house work, or stop his wife from getting angry the next time it happens. They can’t always just eat out. If Stephen joins in, and Brenda is less “drill sergeanty” Lexi would most probably help out too and there’d be more love and fun on Saturday!

  • Ugwuja Deborah Tochukwu

    Wow! This story really got me thinking. I love the way Brenda and her husband, Stephen resolved the case. There are children like Lexi who do not do house chores. It is important for every child to learn how to do chores.

  • Epunam obianuju

    most families don’t actually get along and some even end up breaking up because they don’t know how to resolve minor issues. Brenda’s family is a kind of family that has understanding and her husband also is a man who knows how to handle cases mildly without offending anybody, and that is one major thing that has sustained his family. I think families should learn from their example.

  • Nwannah Juliana ngozi

    Every family has rules and for peace to reign, you have to play by the rules of the family you find yourself in. Brenda was just trying to make Lexi understand the saying “When in Rome, behave like the Romans”. I love the way Stephen handled the situation. I just enjoyed reading about the ladies settling their issues, after all what is family without peace?

    • Uchenwa favour

      There is always disagreements in families and it only takes the understanding of both parties(the husband and wife) to resolve it. Brenda’s husband was understanding, he knew the kind of wife he got married to and so didn’t allow Lexis issue to bring problem between them, he handled it carefully.

  • Jibulu Ngozi

    For Brenda,everything in the house is to be done and shared equally, no one is left out,the way her husband was able to respect her decisions shows that he has a lot of respect for whom he married.
    Its best to understand one’s family unless you are ready to put it in jeopardy.

  • Amuzie Chioma Esther

    UThere is something called home training, anyone who is born on earth and into a family has to do one thing or the other no matter how small to help out in the family affairs. Brenda is completely right in this story by trying to correct Lexi of her behaviour because she is a woman and she cares. Lexi is a girl who in a matter of time will grow up to be a woman and she will have her own husband, home and children, its what she learnt when she was young that she will display when she grows and will also lead her in marriage. For me whether in your biological home or not, you need to show home training. Assuming Lexi finishes her education and gets married and life is not what it seemed to be in her father’s house, what will be her fate? Therefore all hands should be on deck.

  • Peter Chioma Martha

    Understanding is the key in every family and relationship. When there is misunderstanding, the family will be a war zone.

  • Ominaki Pamela

    Before a family can grow, the couple must learn to tolerate and understand each other. Without that, the family will be far from peaceful.


    sometimes disagreement arises between couples but it takes understanding and love to settle everything amicably. Also having self control is another thing that keeps marriage. Wow! an interesting story for both singles and married people.

  • Eze Vivian

    it is a true fact that problems or misunderstanding are prone to happen in a family but it takes maturity, understanding and the grace of God to withstand and conquer such situations when it comes.


    Like Lexi, I’m also a ‘daddies girl’. When I was younger, I never took corrections given to me in my dads presence cause he always supported me.What Brenda would have is call her husband aside and talk to him then later he would inform Lexi of what her new routine.At the end of the day, Lexi is corrected and everyone is happy.
    My parish priest would always say ”for peace to reign,one person has to play the fool”. Brenda’s husband sure did play that role well.

  • Oh yeah!!!…. I have two wonderful drill sergeants. Am I fortunate to have them?
    I really can’t tell. The fact that they are strong, independent, hard driving cholerics can be very annoying. What I love most about their behavior is their persistence, orderliness and set principles. However, I honestly dislike intact I detest the fact that they give little or no room for your opinion. Their motto is simply: “you are to be seen not heard”.

  • Ikechebelu Ginika

    I love this.
    Brenda is a real drill sergeant but I love the way her husband handled the situation, and Brenda having laid down a rule acted as a real woman by quickly getting along with Lexi .

  • Atijegbe Faith Onaefe

    I understand that Brenda is just trying to be an up tight woman of the house, ensuing discipline and all that (like my mom). But she did it in the wrong way, her husband is the one that truly understands how to manage a Home – talking in a soft manner and not shouting always

  • ikebudu juanita

    Honest conversations prevents misunderstanding,Brenda is a smart and observant woman,she took control of the situation between her husband and his cousin amicably before it became too late

  • I wonder if she’s aware that being uptight could do more harm than good as a little liberality on her part could go a long way in fostering amicable relationship between her and Lexi

    • Edith Ohaja

      She did make up with Lexi towards the end. And she agreed to her husband’s terms. That’s the liberality you seek right there. Lol!

  • Oforgu ifeanyi

    I like the way Brenda took the bull by the horns. If she didn’t, some of those nonchalant behaviours Lexi was exhibiting would have grown annoyingly. We should always speak out when we see something wrong happening no matter how close you are with such people. The story is really educative. Everyone needs to read this for peace and love to always reign in their homes.

  • Nwatu chetachukwu Francisca

    Wow………. This story is really interesting, inspiring and educating I really love how Brenda and the husband treated the case that arose in their family. This show that there is understanding and tolerance between the couple which is the key to a successful home.

  • Eze Blessing Ada

    Every family has a problem. I would like to use mine as an example. My parents almost lost their marriage of 17Yrs due to an issue like this, my Dad was always in support of his neice even when she does things that are bad….. My Mom never liked it and it almost resulted to a fight, stuffs started happening, things that happened even before they got married were brought back to the picture but it took the grace of God to actually settle it. I like the way Brenda handled the matter but it also took the brains of her husband to resolve the issue amicably because stuffs like that require a wise person to handle them that way.

  • In a family how one governs his or her temper is very important. I admire Brenda’s bravery of speaking her mind, am in full support of what she did. Stephen wouldn’t have acted that way, he would have at least considered other people. But at the end I loved how Stephen handled the issue it shows his level of maturity and responsibility. He made it up to everyone.

  • OKere Jovita

    Understanding is what matters in a family without understanding one can not be able to build a strong family, thank God Brenda’s husband understands

  • I really admire the way Stephen and Brenda handled their argument. It indeed shows some level of maturity. I couldn’t help but yo notice Stephen’s approach to their argument. He tried as much as possible to bring his points to the fore while trying not to be offensive.This indeed saved them alot of trouble and prevented what would have seem to be ‘family palaver’. If this move is imbibed in our contemporary families, I believe alot of ‘ wahala’ will be avoided.


    Understanding is key in every relationship.Stephen by his action made it worse. brenda is right even though she took it to another level. He should not have gone outside with lexi. they should just have been patience.But nevertheless, women are protective of everything.

  • Chibuzor Marvelous

    understanding is highly required in every union.Brenda was right owing to the fact that the had a tradition in their home.Stephen shouldn’t have taken lexi out.but though Brenda behaviour was harsh to lexi, it was understandable as little thing like this could cripple a marriage without them knowing.

  • I love this family. They were able to handle the situation amicably.

  • Chukwunwenwa Chinenye

    Understanding works like magic in most relationships today. Brenda and her husband settled the situation in a better way which brought about peace in the family.

    Not understanding your partner would definitely lead to chaos all the time.


    family life is often filled with chaos but its the love that keeps us going

  • Nwanne Josephine Chidera

    Understanding is what is needed in dealing with family matters to avoid escalation of little problems. I am the Brenda in my house. I always want everything to go the way I want it. Or else there will problem. But this story will make me consider other members of the family

  • Chah ugochukwu

    I love the way they settled the issue between themselves. In some homes, just that little episode would lead to a huge argument and perhaps silence for days on end.. This is a very refreshing and funny story. Thanks aunty Edith

  • Kooyon Abigail Aershimana

    Almost every family have likely problems but if you refuse to be a succumber,you’re always feeling on top then sorry for quarrels shall remain inevitable in your unbalanced home.
    Nice morals!

  • Chima ella

    Its good to understand your partner and know the best way to resolve issues. Wants someone like Stephen.

  • Ugwoke ifechukwu melvina

    The story is nice and can be related to the real world in the way Brenda’s husband did what he did and the way Brenda went about the matter. I support the way they easily solved their problem.

  • Oma

    Drama !drama !! every family has their own drama , but one important thing about this drama is who handles it maturedly who keeps calm when the other partner is talking .
    Women obviously are the ones that sees fault in everything and anything so its left for the man to handle the situation as the owner of the house.
    What stephen did showed ,he is a good man and husband, because some husbands that carry their own family at heart won’t take what brenda did , he will even beat her join for talking to his cousin like that, but stephen being a wise person handle the situation like one filled with wisdom and also one who understands women .
    I pray the man I will marry will be like stephen .

  • Obiemeka favour chukwugozie

    Nice story I really love the fact that Stephen didn’t argue with his wife . Family life is filled with ups and downs sometimes we bend rules for visitors but there should be caution.

  • Chukwu Oluebube juliet

    Indeed in every family there is must an issue and it takes love and maturity to handle it.Brenda don’t just want to take chances with the husband but he understands her better .understanding is the key to every happy home

  • ifunaya chukwuemeka

    If this is how issues are settled like this in marriage then, i look forward to one, don’t mind me,there are many ”drill sergeant” in my family ranging from my elder sister to my dad etc and of course there will always be one ”Lexi”but we try and grill them to become better.

  • Ossai Chidimma Linda

    Sometimes husbands make their wives look like the bad guy, when a sibling or relative is at home talk to them ,give them the rules governing the house not making it seem like ‘its my wife and her troubles ‘.

  • Ibe favour kalu

    I’m that kind-of-Lexi person at home,always waiting for others to do the house chores while I eat and fix my eyes on the television, haha. Argument between family members is a normal and sure thing,but the way we handle it matters. I love the way Brenda and stephen settled the issue. Peace matters in a family.

  • Ejiofor Emmanuel

    I love the way the couple sorted out the matter well and peacefully. Men like Stephen are few in this modern generation. For Lexi, we can’t Blame her because that was how she was brought up. Their type should be told about House chores in an understanding way so that they won’t see it as if you are maltreating them. It takes time and they will understand.

  • ErnestValentine

    Living together as a family can be very beautiful. Importantly, it takes understanding and tolerance of weaknesses to make every home thrilling. Needless to say that lack of understanding and tolerance is the reason why so many homes are broken today.
    This is suggestive in this story that we can manage how we feel about people including resentful feelings.

  • Dennis Lydia Ekperechukwu

    Family life is not an easy task. Like they say, two wrong can not make a right. I love how Stephen handled his wife. One thing that is very important in a family is understanding.

  • Eze martins Tochukwu

    I can’t blame Brenda for reacting the way she did, most time it is not easy to be working and the people like Lexi is sitting around watching. But understanding the personality of the person involve and situation causing the problem which Stephen did is the sure way of solving the problem.
    He show us that every body need to be love and care for; this is seen when he embraced his wife and kiss her and how he bought food Lexi, he created the balance and the problem was resolve.

  • Egelebe uzoma geraldine

    communication is the key !!Transparency and understanding in relationship and marriage is a key building block to keep it flourishing. just like Stephen and Brenda issues was addressed immediately without carrying it over to another day…that is how relationships as a whole needs to be to avoid regrets afterwards.

  • Akupue chibuike

    Perfection in human being is totally impossible because of dynamic nature of our life styles. But we can achieve perfection by tolerance. Every United and happy family you see today is built on tolerance. Both spouses are tolerating each other’s fault. Stephen’s reaction towards her wife’s action is an atom of maturity. That Lexi is not good at house chores doesn’t really mean that she is worthless. It simply means that she’s not good at that particular one but she can be good at other things. We should learn how to accommodate people the way they are. You can refine people but you can’t change who they’re.

  • Agbo onyekachi obumneme

    . Ya! I remember my Dad getting offended at my Mum because my Mum beat us and not just that we were beaten but that she used her hand instead of cane and Dad would prefer she used cane because according to him, using hand on children can be injurious to their health. It almost caused serious problem between both of them but my Mum understood and adjusted. It has to do with understanding. There is hardly a home were there can be no misunderstanding even among Christian homes but it depends on the understanding the couple have about themselves. Aside financial related matters and other things which can serve as sources matrimonial problems, even the God-given children can still constitute a source of misunderstanding.

    Ma, please I will like to understand what “Drill Sergent” means. please can you explain that for me?

    • Edith Ohaja

      Check from dictionaries or google it. That’s the best way to learn. Meanwhile, check my Facebook page, Aunty Edith, for a funny video about drill sergeants.

  • Favour obi

    I think I like the way Stephen handled the issue. Not every husband would have such humility and understanding. It only takes a man of wisdom to do what Stephen did. It shows he loves and adores his wife, Brenda. It is a good thing generally as believers, to not be ignorant of the devil’s devices. Emotions or situations sometimes if not handled strategically with wisdom, could result to problems. Well, I thank God for the godly example given in this story for couples who would find themselves in a similar situation.

  • Chiwetelu Stella

    Sweet story.
    Understanding is everything.
    I love the way Stephen handled the situation.

  • Duruji Veralin Ogochukwu

    Very educating story indeed. With honesty, open-mindedness and the right choice of words, issues can easily get solved. I must say Stephen and Brenda are very good friends before husband and wife. There is need for order and harmony in the home.

  • Eya Paschal

    Understanding is the key to every peaceful home and when there is lack of understanding, there will always be no peace in the home. Stephen is indeed a man of wisdom and i respect him for the way he handled the issue in his home peacefully with his wife Brenda with involving a third party or making it a public concern. He is truly a man of good understanding because not all men will do what he did. This is very inspiring story Ma. God bless you.

  • Her background is to be blamed. Some people are brought up with snacks and beverages and they can’t do without it .Lexi should have adapted to Brenda’s way of cooking. When we are not in our homes, we should adapt to the situation of where we find ourselves even though it will be hard to .

  • Adeke Chukwuka

    It is normal for us to be angry as human beings at a point in time; but what we should do is to learn to control our emotions whenever we are angry, so we don’t regret our actions later.

  • Joseph Chizoba Kingsley

    I love the understanding in this family. actually understands what his wife was trying to do. She doesn’t want their children to be influenced by the attitude of Lexi and that is why she’s insisting she engages in house chores. And also she wants to learn.

  • The drill sergeant in my house is my dad and the Lexi is our last born. She thinks she’s on top of the world. Time to do work she’s either having headache or back pain Once she hears we are having beans for lunch, she will tell my mum that she’s not feeling well and wants to eat bread instead. Her own is definitely a case of too much pampering. When my dad insists that she eats whatever is cooked she’ll cry her eyes out but my dad won’t even shake ???. And my mom would have to agree with him.

  • Onyia Queendalene Ngozi

    No matter how bad you feel about a particular thing as a woman in her home, you should try to sort things out with your husband if the issue is between you and your spouse and not discussing in front of your visitors no matter how hurt it may be.

  • Abaraonye Chidinma

    I love this! My mom is the drill Sergeant and I used to be the lexis. When I was little I hated chores, but as I started growing, I just suddenly started falling in love with some of them. It’s reasonable for families to settle matters in love and understanding without the next door neighbour knowing about it. Nice piece ma.


    Family life requires a lot of patience and understanding because our actions towards issues matters a lot.A good story for some of our family members and that allow little issues to escalate,linger and get out of control.This is a clear reminder to us that we need to learn how accomodate others as Brenda did with Lexi even though she was suspicious of her in the beginning.

  • Osisioma Princess

    I like how your stories, makes us reason and think, well for me, I think brenda’s a little bit too strict, but she was right, everyone needs to pitch in the house and it’s good Lexi did, also a very enviable family

  • Nwosu Victoria

    personally i think i am a lexi because i am the last born and everyone in my family acts like a brenda.,lol…i get how frustrating that can be to have that one person who just gets to be free from all the work and stress, however, i dont think the ‘brendas’ should take things too seriously, allowing such petty issues to come into building and maintaining a healthy family relationships. again, when maturity sets in =, things definitely would change and hopefully, the ‘lexis’ would change too.

  • Paschal Odigonma Victoria

    I like the way Stephen handled the situation. You know when you have someone in the house who had this “fire head” (drill sergeant), there’s always another one – the fire quencher who helps to pacify the moment. It’s a good thing they are both understanding enough to come to an amicable agreement. This is how a family grows stronger and better.

  • Onwuamaeze Ikechukwu John

    What an interesting way to end a quarrel. That little act by the Husband(Stephen) is a thoughtful one. Any attempt to angrily talk back at Brenda would’ve resulted to something else. Most times it’s better to let go certain things and go for peace. Interesting story.

  • Victor Nzubechi

    Family living can get so frustrating but love and understanding settles all. When issues are sorted out amicably, the family lives in peace.

  • ugwu Ozioma joy

    Finally found my favourite…..

    Read it thrice…its interesting,Stephen handled the issue in a matured way,and I actually think Brenda should loosen up and Lexi should learn to do chores,she’s living in their house and as such she should adapt to the lifestyle there

  • Agena Yimase

    I like how Stephen handled the situation with Brenda. All that has to be done is to tell Lexi her new chores and I’m sure she will adapt and peace will reign.

  • Thanks for this realistic story Ma. Is good that Stephen and Brenda ended up understanding each other which is very very important between couples because I personally feel good whenever I see my parents haven quarrelled some minutes ago, are seen gisting and laughing. LET LOVE LEAD!!!

  • Understanding is key in any kind of relationship. For a relationship to last or stand, the people involved must understand each other and agree.

  • My mum is the drill seargent in my family.
    But I think it’s just a matter of understanding. I love how Joseph tackled his family issue nd made peace nd happiness to reign.
    Am grateful MA. The story was really fascinating.

  • Eze chikadibia Joan

    My mum indeed is my family’s drill sergeant. She hates it when you are free or not hardworking. Nevertyeless, my dad just like Stephen makes sure that everything goes peacefully and with ease.

  • Eze Chioma

    Brenda was clearly trying to put her house in order and not upset the system by having lexi join in on the house work for the duration of her stay, instead of having her twins wait on Lexi and thereby increasing their work. I like that she and her husband handled this minor problem like matured adults and reached a compromise. This is how a family should be, tackling problems as soon as they come.

  • Ugwuanyi Collette Mmesoma

    Wow! What an interesting and didactic story. It is normal to have people like Lexi and Brenda in the family. The way you tackle issues arising by these different people either mar or make the peace and orderliness in the family

  • Immanuella Uwa

    Family is drama. you ae not to allow arguements foster on. My mum used to say “Agree to disagree”. Tackle issues the right way, be diplomatic.

  • Rose Mary

    Thank you Ma for another wonderful story. I learnt a lot from these story one is a women or wife should be efficient in her work . A woman or wife is not wood she needs helping hand to assist her in her work.

  • Amah Damian Uchechukwu

    This story teaches how to manage a house hold,I like the way Breda relates with her husband,her husband also understands the kind of woman that he married,nice story ma,am expecting more!


    I love the way brenda and stephen resolved their little misunderstanding. Most times, women like to push things to another level that would strain their relationship with their husbands. This story reflects how understanding is a key and big factor in building a strong and lasting relationship.

  • Amah Damian Uchechukwu

    When love and understanding prevails in the family,it will ensure cooperation and nalice free,which can end up make a good home

  • Cynthia

    Wow. Really loved the way Brenda and her husband run d house .Brenda Trying to do here possible best to see the smooth running of the home. And her husband is a very loving and understanding man, that know how and when to cool is wife when she act’s up.. Love this story.. Thanks ma..

  • Aroh Cynthia Chioma

    What Brenda did was good by confronting his husband and lexi when they did what she didn’t like. Unlike some women who might be upset with their husband but tries to keep it to themselves or showing their husband attitude which can cause family disorder.
    Stephen on his own part acted maturely by not taking the case seriously rather he settled it amicably.

  • Chukwuneke adaeze jennifer

    Brenda has courage she attempted confronting her husband because of his attidue which would bring trouble she is doing her best to keep her family together and her husband is also a Good loving and understanding man because love and trust is the basic of every family or relationship.. Thank you ma’am for your write up

  • Obiaga ifunanya steph

    Lol.brenda was a little extra but then she has a say in her home and her huaband stephen is even very patient and understanding because some men would have made this minor issue a major issue
    Understanding is a necessity amongst family

  • Janefrances Nwaduche

    A nice story. I love the synergy between Brenda and her husband. Brenda confronts her problems head-on and her husband is understanding; a quality which is sometimes very rare in some homes. I think Lexi’s stay in their house will her hardworking; her short stay notwithstanding.

  • Wow, I’m really thrilled at Stephens attitude towards the wife and how he calmly resolved the issue. However, Brenda reacted the way every woman would have. Its actually annoying when a grown lady would fold legs enjoying ice cream while food is being prepared in the kitchen. A typical African woman won’t tolerate that for a Sec. Its the height of indiscipline in Lexi’s side.

  • Chukwurah Nnenna Chisom

    Lolzz. Family is indeed full of drama but how you handle it is most important. The couple have this amazing understanding. Stephen totally knows the kind of woman he married and he is so calm. Interesting story ma

  • Bryan. c. okoroigwe

    Steven really showed maturity in handling Brenda, kudos.

  • Clifford Ndujihe

    I must say love runs in this family, as the man of the house Stephen took care of the situation very well, however I was surprised the way Brenda and Lexi went along at the ending.

  • Clifford Ndujihe

    I must say love runs in this family, as the man of the house Stephen took care of the situation very well, however I was surprised the way Brenda and Lexi went along at the ending it was wonderful

  • Lol,loved the piece. Such a good father. My dreams ?. Shows how well men can handle family issues peacefully.

  • Goodness Rex

    It takes wisdom to manage this kind of situation, nice post.

  • Igbokwe Rita Chinecherem

    LOL! Every family has issues but what matters most is how you approach the problem. There is always a happy ending when there is understanding. Where understanding is lacking, there is always fighting and chaos.

  • Nnabuihe Victoria

    This is almost the case in my family. Though it takes understanding and corporation among-st members of the family to live happily and problem free. Stevens attitude to his wife to resolve the issue is worth emulating.

  • Ebenezer

    My aunty is a drill sergeant, Brenda and her has the same character in common, well in this story I love the wisdom being showed by the husband, he’s a role model to every husband out there, he don’t beats or exchange strong words with his wife rather he made peace in a heated complain.

  • Egenti Blossom Mmesoma

    The way her husband handled the situation is admirable. He didn’t let it get out of control. He handled it maturely and everything just died down peacefully. I think we can all learn something from this and try not to let our anger escalate.


    Family drama is sometimes fillies with extremism.Brenda took it personal, the husband should have just allowed the normal routine or tradition in the house.although he(the husband) feared and felt for Lexi.I think understanding is divine in any Union. With the way Brenda behaved it could make her detest visiting their home again.nice one ma.

  • Ezekiel Stanley C.

    Hahahaha! Typical family episodes….there are usually misunderstandings, oh yes! but it takes matured mind, tolerance to settle such matters.. What an interesting way to settle quarrels in homes. Someone commented that “all the quyz reading this should learn ooo.” Hmmmmmmm… Ladies learn too it is important.

  • Joy Morgan

    I really like what Brenda did. Its important to learn how to adapt to a new environment. She should have been a bit subtle but she made a good point. Family life can be annoying at times but its wonderful to be around family.

  • Ezema Uchechukwu

    Ma, I’ve noticed that most of your stories touch day to day issues that people face in the society, in the Family, in interpersonal relationships with one another.
    You find a way to bring clarity to seemingly insurmountable and incessant challenges and proffer solutions as if they were mere childish shenanigans.
    Kudos, more power to your elbow!

  • Adiukwu Desire

    Wisdom is the principal thing. I commend Stephen for the wisdom he applied in handling such a situation. As for me I can’t accommodate a character like Lexi in my home. Even though I do unknowing her characters, once I find out, I will send her back to her parents or get an apartment for her.

  • Duru Joselyn Amarachi

    First,this is truly an interesting one. The way Brenda spoke shows she is a a strong woman that knows what she wants and says what she wants to say how she feels like saying it.And this she did without grudge because we see at the end of the story that she smiled to Lexi.
    Secondly,it is pertinent that there be understanding in marriage. Stephen understands his wife so well that he knew what could upset her and definitely how to lighten her mood.
    Third, children like Lexi should be sent to their relatives with the ‘Brendan’kind of trait so that they will end up being not just of good to their families alone but to the whole society at large.

  • Egbo Paul Uchenna

    Family is everything. Sometimes I marvel at the way family get back together as if they’ve never had any misunderstanding. The husband deserves an A1 in conflict resolution.

  • Adiukwu Desire

    Wisdom is the principal thing. I commend Stephen for the wisdom he applied in handling such a situation. As for me I can’t accommodate a character like Lexi in my home. Even though I do unknowing her characters, once I find out, I will send her back to parents or get an apartment for her.

  • Godwin Grace

    I commend Stephen on the way he was able to handle the matter. Also, I think couples should learn to be accommodating regardless I will of who the person is.

  • Agwu Tochukwu Frank

    Understanding is very Paramount in every relationship.
    Through understanding, a lovely home is built.
    God bless you MA

  • Onah Joy Chimdalu

    Every family has its own drama but it only takes grace and understanding to make things right again

  • Obiogwu Onyinye

    Lolz,awwn, this is swt
    I must say the best thing that could happen to anyone is marrying who understands him or her, love goes “siriri werere” ?

  • Ebi osinachi mercy

    Look at the way he handle the situation, things like this have destroy alot of home because of crazy approaches from different angle, Brendan knows what she wants… I don’t encourage going to someone’s house and not helping out in some few things (if you go to Rome, act like a Roman) it’s beautiful that at the ending she was friendly to the girl, meaning she’s a kindof person that says her mind and don’t put it too much to heart, and thank God her husband knows the kindof wife he married

  • Rejoice Chiwudom Onyewuchi

    Alway a pleasure to read your writing!
    I am the drill sergeant in our household!
    I am the Martha who needs more Mary moments.
    Thank you for this reminder to slow down to take time to be with the Lexis in my life.

  • Nwabuisi chinonso peace

    I actually have a lexi in my family and surprisingly she’s my cousin. Before, she hardly did anything in the house but all we did was talk to her personally and she understood that she has to lend a helping hand in the family. Sometimes in a family you just have to talk calmly to people so that they can understand certain things that they are supposed to do. I absolutely do not encourage going to somebody’s house and not doing your fair share of work. I’m just saying that if there is a mutual understanding between the two parties things will work out. In a case where the person still continues to behave the same way he or she does then by all means the person can find accommodation elsewhere. I like way that Stephen handled the argument though. Like I said in a statement i made earlier mutual understanding is important.

  • Nwachukwu Ruth Chimuanya

    Families go through alot of things these days both serious and otherwise. But what makes it worth it, is the understanding and love they share. I do not support the husband endorsing his spoiled cousin

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