Intro by Edith Ohaja
The subject of shame is not an easy one to handle because it comes in different forms and is highly misunderstood. Shame can be helpful as something that prevents us from doing sordid stuff because we don’t want to be identified with those types of practices. So when people are described as having no shame, it implies they don’t mind the stigma that comes from repugnant behaviour, they don’t give a hoot if they are branded by their discreditable actions.

But there is another kind of shame where we define ourselves by things we did in the past or things that were done to us. This kind of shame could also arise from a feeling that we don’t measure up to some standard, perhaps of beauty, intellect or wealth. How does this kind of shame fit into the concept of being saved, redeemed by the blood of Christ? What are the implications of this kind of shame in the life of a believer?

My dear friend and sister, Karissa Smith, has adeptly handled this confusing subject in this post. Karissa shares from her growing up experience and walk with the Lord to help us understand our place in Christ and the right attitude we should have towards the second type of shame described above.

Many thanks to Karissa for sharing with us. I pray great enlargement of coast for her in her family and ministry in Jesus’ name. (You can learn more about her at the end of the post.)

“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” – 2 Corinthians 5:17 (KJV)



It came when I was a child.

Traumatic events sowed a seed and I didn’t even know.

And I didn’t know that it would go deep.

It would go even deeper before it grew wide.

It whispered lies to me about who I was and who I would become.

Ultimately, it brought me to a place in which I believed that to value myself at all was very wrong.


It was shame that came and grew.

And oh how crippling shame can be.

Paralyzing the legs that were meant to run.

Covering the light that was meant to shine.

Hiding the jewels meant to be shared.

And yet some Christians embrace shame as a loyal friend.

According to shame is “the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc., done by oneself or another”.

Let’s be clear! Shame is not to be confused with guilt.

Dr. Neel Burton of Psychology Today notes this about shame:

“Shame says, ‘I am bad.’ Guilt says, ‘I did something bad.'” He also says this of shame: “‘Shame’ derives from ‘to cover’, and is often expressed by a covering gesture over the brow and eyes, a downcast gaze, and a slack posture.”

A painful feeling

similar to guilt but different…

It told me who I was,

and I hid.

[bctt tweet=”Shame paralyzes our legs and covers our light. – Karissa Smith” username=”edithohaja1″]

My Story

You see, part of my story and experience with shame is that I became exposed to sexual things as a child. And it opened up things inside of me that I did not understand. I did not know how to cope.

The shame was deep and the lies were intricate-too complicated for me to understand as a child. Too many variations of deception for me to realize at the time.

What I thought I understood is that I must somehow be less lovable. I was still shown love. But shame is powerful and so I believed the lie that I was broken in a way that could not be undone. I really thought it would mark me for the rest of my life.

Isn’t that what shame does? It says: “This is who you are, and there is nothing you can do about it. You are doomed to be broken, ugly and stained for the rest of your life.”

On top of that, I grew up under teaching that emphasized sin as a way of motivating us towards holiness.

So I believed it was okay to despise myself. It was good to have shame. I was a sinner after all, right?

And if I was a sinner, why wouldn’t I be ashamed?

And this focusing on my sin… wouldn’t it make me better?

Wouldn’t it motivate me to grow in Christ?

But here’s the thing…

I didn’t know who I was.

Outside of Christ, shame makes sense.

Shame says that I am morally incompatible.

Unworthy of His love and affection.

You see, shame is so deeply attached to who we are.

But guess what? I wasn’t outside of Christ. My name was not sinner anymore.

I didn’t know… I didn’t really understand that Christ radically changed who I was.

So this begs the question: Who are we?

What Does God Say?

  • In Christ, our identity has changed fundamentally. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
  • We are NO LONGER ENEMIES. We are now accepted by God. (Colossians 1:21-22)
  • JESUS took our shame. He bore it on the cross. (1 Peter 2:24)
  • God now sees the righteousness of Christ when He sees us. (2 Corinthians 5:21)
  • We are no longer slaves to sin. (Romans 6:6)
  • Our old man has been crucified with Christ. (Galatians 2:20)

Do we as Christians still sin sometimes? Yes, we do. Is it okay to feel guilty for our actions? Yes.

Should we celebrate sin and revel in it? No! That would be dishonoring God who sent His Son to pay the debt for our sins and reconcile us to Himself.

We should repent when we err and with God’s help, we shall be transformed from glory to glory to represent His image we continually behold in His word (2 Corinthians 3:18).

What’s Your Story?

Perhaps, you are haunted by shame but your story may be different from mine. Your shame may come from some physical imperfections, your slowness at learning, your very humble background, some apirations that have so far eluded you (e.g. getting married, earning a degree, becoming a parent, getting a good job …). Whatever its source, if you are living in shame, you don’t know who you are.

No one can tell you who you are but God and this is what He says about you.

God says you are loved. (Romans 8:37-39)

God says you are redeemed. (Ephesians 1:7)

He says you are free. (John 8:36)

He says you are His child. (Galatians 4:7)

God says you’re fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 149:14)

God says you are a co-heir with Christ. (Romans 8:17)

God says you are a new creation. (2 Corinthians 5:17)

God says he has blessed you with everything that pertains to life and godliness. (2 Peter 1:3)

And guess what?

It’s okay to believe Him!

[bctt tweet=”Believe what God says about you rather than the lies of shame. – Karissa Smith” username=”edithohaja1″]

Friends, if you are tempted to believe the lie that to value yourself is prideful, think again! If you are tempted to believe that it is godly to embrace shame, think again!

It is a trick of the devil to get you to stay in a place of despising yourself. Because if you despise yourself, you aren’t really understanding the gospel. You aren’t really believing the implications it has in your life.

And if you don’t understand and embrace the good news of Jesus Christ that says you are new, clean, free and complete in Him, you can’t fully experience the reality of it. And you certainly will not share that good news. And isn’t that what the enemy wants? He knows the power that comes from complete redemption and freedom in Christ.

Friends, I know it isn’t easy. Shame can go so deep. And the people around you might encourage you to hold onto it. But please don’t forget… it is only God who can tell you who you are. Believe what God says about you. Make His words the focus. Because what you focus on is what you will become.

Be encouraged! Christ’s complete work on the cross has given you new life- new identity. As you choose to hold on to this, I guarantee you will see God move in powerful ways in your life. And when He does, don’t forget to share the stories. Your identity matters. You matter!




Have you ever struggled with shame for any reason? Care to share how you overcame it?

What aspect of this post touched you most?

You are blessed!


Hello! I’m Karissa. I’m from Illinois, USA. I have a bachelor’s degree in social work, but now I get to stay at home with my children. I love coffee, photography, writing, people, and Jesus. I got saved when I was five years old, and it was my mom who led me to the Lord. Since then my understanding of the gospel has continued to grow deeper, richer and sweeter.

I’m happily married to a strong and kind man of God who loves people and truth. We have two incredible children who truly amaze and inspire us. You can get to know more about me and my family over at It’s a place that is all about inspiring and equipping you to become all that you were created to be in Christ. I believe you are a warrior for Christ-created with a beautifully unique identity and an amazing purpose. Your identity matters. You matter! You can also follow me on Pinterest and Facebook.


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  • Thanks for the opportunity to collaborate with you for this post Edith! I pray that it blesses all who read it! There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus!!

    • Edith Ohaja

      Amen and amen in Jesus’ name. I have no doubt that many will continuously be blessed by your contribution. God bless you, your family and ministry overwhelmingly in Jesus’ name.

  • Thanks so much for sharing your story at Edith’s place, Karissa. So many women have experienced the same. May God use your words to help them find freedom from shame.

  • Well done! Your post is really moving, sometimes it feels really good to dive headlong into sin.
    The reward would be a temporary pleasure, lasting maybe five to ten minutes but the after effects last longer.
    Shame is one of the effects of sin; most times, we get over it and commit another and then another, until our conscience becomes hardened and we feel shame no longer.
    So when the urge to engage in sin comes, i tell myself this: ” You are a christian! When you sleep, when you wake, when you lie down, 24 hours of the day.”
    Besides, the benefit is a lasting relationship with Jehovah and Everlasting life in relation with John 3:16

    • Edith Ohaja

      This is a bit tricky. I think you are referring to guilt or remorse for wrongdoing. As the post shows, guilt is acknowledgement of wrongdoing while shame is a feeling that one is dishonorable as a result of the wrongdoing. God’s grace in all your endeavours, Wisdom!

    • As Edith said, guilt is something that should draw us closer to God, but shame will drive us further from Him. But yes, the wonder of the gospel is that as much as we fall, as much as we fail, God’s promise of His love still remains. His covenant is unmovable. It’s easy to get caught up in a sin cycle and feel like we have gone too far from God. And somehow we can get to thinking that the more we focus on how bad we are , the better we will become. But what is actually true is that the more we focus on who God is, His kindness will bring us to repentance!

      • Edith Ohaja

        Excellent, Karissa! Thank you so much for your warm presence and affirmations. Glory to God for this collaboration and endless blessings on you and yours in Jesus’ name.


    Lovely! It’s really thoughtful for you to post this. I really needed it and it’s really quite educative and inspiring.
    I know lots of people that battle with shame, i do sometimes but i pray when i feel such.
    Sometimes shame could be as a result of something you did wrong or a talent you’re ashamed of or even about one’s heritage, skin or nationality.
    This post is really helpful, especially for youths within my vicinity.

    • Edith Ohaja

      You hit some raw nerves there, Onyinyechi. Many black people are bleaching their skin for this reason; Nigerians suffer this internationally because of online fraud perpetrated by our compatriots and the incompetence and corruption among our leaders. But we are citizens of God’s kingdom first and foremost. We should not bury our heads because of the negative association coming from these things. We are who God says we are, period. (However, I wonder the kind of talent someone can be ashamed of.) Thanks for your insightful comment. God’s abundant blessings on you and our sister, Karissa, who wrote the post.

    • I’m so glad this blessed you Onyinyechi!

  • Bessong Faith Ada

    Self love is a Godly thing, it really helps to build up ones self esteem. Shame is really toxic. Though it’s good to feel guilty about doing something wrong because it shows just how contrite you are but then shame and feeling condemned is really bad for our mental growth.
    Thank you for this post. It’s really uplifting!

    • Edith Ohaja

      When we sin and confess, God forgives and before Him, it’s as though we never sinned. That is why the Bible calls us the righteousness of God in Christ. Carrying the weight of our past when we have been cleansed and renewed is the oppression of the devil. Bless you, Faith.

    • Yes, there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus! Amen!


    Very true! I can be really proud, i confess, but at the same time i know how to tone it down a bit.
    The Lord has done quite a lot for us and so we owe it to him to steer clear of sin.
    Sin is temporary but the gift of the Lord lasts forever! I appreciate this, can i forward it to a couple of friends? They really need to hear this.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Hi Amanda! You do realise that the shame we feel may not necessarily be as a result of our own sin. It may be because we are made to feel inferior. For example, the media harp on having a toned body, thigh gap, stuff like that. It makes some people ashamed of their bodies, which are quite normal and healthy, simpky because they have a little flab here and there. As to pride, as long as our confidence and boasting are not in ourselves but in the Lord, it isn’t harmful to us or others. Thank you and remain blessed!

    • Feel free to share as much as you want! We all need to know and be reminded of the freedom we have in Christ!

  • Chantal Nwoye

    we can always turn to God in prayer. He is that friend that understands, that we can confide in and who will help us. He sometimes responds through bible portions. For example, i find the bible book of Job to be helpful and i get to really live the lives of bible characters in my head.
    Viewing them as actually having lived in history and facing such problems that i face. An example is of “Esther”, she was a young girl like me, brought up by an older cousin who worshipped God. But she was taken away from a life that was all she knew and introduced to a life of luxury that if not kept in check, could result in Vanity.
    She might have felt shame being a jew because at that time they were prejudiced against. it may have been the reason why her cousin encouraged her to keep it secret. God blessed her for being faithful by using her to save her people.
    When she was taken away, she may have asked: “I serving God faithfully, why would he allow me to be taken away from my cousin? Why did he allow my parents to die? {Esther lost her parents at an early age} How would he save his people from extinction?”

    • Edith Ohaja

      Thank you for your very thoughtful comment, Chantal! God is really a friend, the best in fact. He may not answer all our questions but He works all things out for our eventual good. May God’s guidance be your portion always in Jesus’ name.

    • Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment! Your insight is a blessing!

  • Okike UKAMAKA Eunice

    Shame is powerful and toxic that if you are not careful it can destroy your future. Shame can give you many reasons that you are unfit to go ahead with your life but the best thing is to avoid things that will bring shame which is majorly sin. Thanks, ma, for this wonderful post!

    • Edith Ohaja

      We should never forget that God is always ready to forgive our sins. It is good to try to avoid sin by the grace of God. But if we do sin, we need to run to God for restoration. Bless you, Ukamaka!

    • Yes, shame is powerful and toxic, but the power of the cross is even greater and will free us! Praise God!

  • Chukwuma CHEKWUBE Jennifer

    Shame can keep someone away from God because if you do a shameful thing you will be uncomfortable with yourself.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Yeah, but we shouldn’t let that happen. When we come to God in repentance, He not only forgives us, He wipes the record. God’s grace in everything you do, Chekwube, in Jesus’ name.

    • I’m so glad that in Christ we are no longer defined by the things we have done or the things we will do- instead we are defined now by what Christ did for us! And this truth, when we really understand it, really revel in it, and really show our gratitude for it, is what will cause our hearts to be even more intimate with the only One who can define us and the only One who can change us! (The kindness of the Lord leads us to repentance.)


    Shame, guilt and sin are the traps Satan use to catch the children of God. But Jesus said on the cross ” it is finished”. I believe my sins, guilt and shame are no more because he died to set me free from these traps of Satan


    Sin brings shame but a worthy and holy life devoid of sin makes one a great ambassador of Christ. A good christian should try and steer clear of sin in order not to be hoodwinked with guilt and shame.

    • Edith Ohaja

      Well, it is nice to live a life pleasing to God but we must realize that shame sometimes plagues people regardless for different reasons. The antidote is to understand who we are in Christ and believe what God says about us in His word.

    • Becoming Kiona

      The Holy Spirit will help us to avoid sin as we walk with and toward the Lord, but ultimately what qualifies us to be ambassadors for Christ is His sinless life and His complete work on the cross!

  • Ezeh Onyekachukwu c

    God please take away any form of character and attitude that will bring shame to us. Let us live a life that will please you.

    • Yes, thanks for the prayer. What an amazing God we serve that even when we do things that are not pleasing to Him, we still don’t have to walk in shame. We are forgiven by the blood of Christ and we have been given HIS righteousness. Wow! Thank you Lord!


    Shame brings low self esteem and lack of confidence. We should try and shun shame by knowing God personally and living a life bereft of sin.


    Lovely. Shame can make us not to be contented with what we have, even to the extent of making us not to be proud of our self or where we are from. thanks a lot.

  • Shame is not godly and no matter what we might have gone through in the past, in Christ we become new creatures. He is the way!

  • Sunday Ezekwesiri Daniel

    Shame is a toxic agent to spiritual growth. The major factor of shame is sin and sin brings a distance between us and God. The devil tries to use it to molest God’s children but the bible made us to understand that God is ever forgiving and whenever we get down on our knees and plead for mercy, He forgives us and, guess what, He makes us new again. So shame should not stop us from forging ahead in life. In short, it is a platform for reconciliation with God. We should always remember that we are ambassadors of Christ. God bless you.

    • Becoming Kiona

      “A toxic agent”, yes indeed! Good way to put it! Praise God Christ Paid it all and only He can tell us who we are!

  • This is powerful!! I pinned it on three Pinterest boards. God bless you Edith and Kiona for spreading hope and wisdom.

  • okoh daniel

    No body should have to go through life living with shame and that’s where love comes in.

  • onyeabor ijeoma Rita

    seriously i am tied down by shame, sometimes i feel so inferior, i keep mute in some certain things that i know within me will make a change when voiced, i always feel i wont make sense when am called up, even when am mandated to do those things shame makes me flop but within me i know who i am but am being drawn back by shame. really am a bit relieved from shame after reading this post, i pray i get the confidence to explore the real me, thanks ma for sharing

  • Akumambila ijeoma Winifred

    Shame is very powerful that individuals can’t put up with. It gives you reasons that you can’t go ahead with your life. But the best thing to do is to avoid it and also things that yield shame. Thanks Auntie.

  • Uwaegbuonu Precious

    This post just reminded me of GS presentation in first year, how I thanked God I won’t be among the people to present….
    I had this problem of being shy and scared of making mistakes because I felt people will laugh at me.
    But right now I’ve seen more reasons to be bold and confident…

  • Ugwu Amarachi Chinemerem

    Believe me shame is very toxic, some times it makes you wish the ground could just open and sink you in, a lot of times i carry my self like an egg because i believe even a little crack will bring me shame, shame can make you want to loose your mind,m but trust me, it only takes the grace of the almighty

  • thelma Ideozu

    This is SUCH an important post because it is addressing an issue many would rather not speak about because it is painful & uncomfortable. This post is full of Hope & love. Thank you!

  • Amachukwu Amarachi mercy

    Shame is not a good thing, but with God our shame because fame..
    With God our shame becomes rain of oceans, disgrace becomes grace. This is because God is involved.

  • Ruth Ejimanya

    What an inspirational message ma, Aunty Edith thank you for letting such on your blog.
    Karrissa Smith thanks so much.
    Indeed the Sacrifice of Christ is sufficient for our Salvation and anyone who believes in the finished work of Christ is saved.
    Christ died for the sins of the whole world and any one who believes and is saved.
    Some believers are ignorant of this facts and they allow the devil to ruin and weigh them down with his lies of rejection. Any one born of God is not condemned.


    We can actually not feel ashamed When we learn how to nurture ourselves by being present with caring and compassion for our own existential feelings, we will no longer have a need to protect against these feelings with blame or shame.

  • Gideon Kosiso

    Wow!! This post is very encouraging. It has put in me a very great understanding about shame and its difference from guilt. Wonderful collaboration!!

  • Akwara Agatha Uchechi

    What is there to be ashamed of when we have Christ? There is no shame in christ only outside Christ. When we are in sin, we accept shame as a lifestyle and it takes over our life. But when we realise that there is one who is greater than the word “shame”, we can live in confidence.

  • Obidigbo Ifunanya Nino

    when the lord is with us, we should not be ashamed of anything even our past mistakes and should not live in our past mistakes, we should think about the future, mistakes are meant to happen but when God is with us it paves way for success, and also we should boast of the good deeds he has done to us, also ignore any friends or family that makes you feel like nothing, you are something in Gods eye and the apple in his eyes, whoever touches you touch what belongs to Him.

  • Udeobasi Ngozi B.

    We should never be ashamed of who we are or what we have because we think we are not up to standard or that other people are better than us. Rather we should be happy and contented with what we have.

  • Orji Chidiebube Prudence

    Oh My! Real deep!! This write-up is and will continue to be successful in opening many eyes. People feel that operating as a sinner, that is the state of unworthiness, is the right way of life for a Christian, but this is wrong. Yes we are unworthy, but not until Christ’s finished work! He made us worthy, He made us equal with Him(co-heirs)… Thank you Ma, for this privilege of access to this wonderful write-up.

  • Amana Sharon Umola

    This is amazing. Shame is indeed paralyzing. It also reduces one. We must refuse to be belittled and limited by shame. Thank you so much ma for the opportunity to read this.

  • Okorie Flora

    Shame reduces a persons dignity and right to live. We should not be ashamed of who we are rather we should be contented and pray to God to uplift you

  • Ezike winifred udochukwu

    I feel that if we keep living in shame we would never know what God has in stock for us and end up missing our tracks..we should pray to God for d ability to leave that shell and come out to the light.??for GOD is light

  • Awaka vivian

    As children of God we are overcomers,we are not meant to be ashamed of ourselves or feel guilt,because Christ has come to forgive sins and save us

  • Aleke Juliet

    You are very right, ma, because based on personal experience, I have come to realize that shame does more harm than good in one’s life.

  • Mbam Patrick chinonyelum.

    Awesome ! It is utterly thoughtful for you to post this.This especially for those in my vicinity who are ashamed of their complexion(skin) , their talents and nationality .As aunty said “that guilt is something that draws us closer to God” one should disassociate himself from shame ,so as to atone for one sins and to be forgiven by the Alpha and omega (God).

  • Oshana Oyaku Endurance

    So true! No condemnation in Christ,no matter what one is going through God can align you with himself. If only you can make yourself available, you will not be ashamed when he comes.

  • Onah Chimdalu

    If any man is in Christ,he is a new creature, old things have passed away. Let us not be swayed by our past experiences or the bad things we might have done. Leave the past things, know who you are in Christ and move on with face held high. Really blessed by this post.

  • Anekwe Paschaline

    It is not easy not to feel ashamed about who we were and what we did in the past but with the grace of God we can overcome anything in life

  • Thank you Mum for the post. Sometimes we need to read some short write-ups to keep us on track. The post got me to think of some aspects of my life and to recap up in view of being a better me.

  • Nnachetam Favour Chinecherem

    If anyone is in Christ his is a new creature old things are passed away, behold all things are new ” this implies that as a new creature you don’t have a past, your slate is as clean as that of a baby so there is no past that you should be ashamed of. Thanks for this guest post. It blessed my life.

  • Ekwuagana Fabian Ikechukwu

    Praise God.
    I can tell you that I relate to every bit of your story when I was living outside Christ, until one day my story changed when I discovered that Jesus Christ is my only salvation. Thanks for your story, Ma’am Karissa! It’s really inspiring.

  • Chukwuma Emenike Wilfred

    An inspiring and motivational post I must say. Shame as we know is not a metaphysical concept, it is what occurs in the life of people around us. Synonymously, I experienced it as a kid growing up which was pioneered by low self esteem and I needed something like this, but couldn’t get any. But thanks to God that rescued me from the shackles of this shame. An awesome post that exposes the life of a Christian which is marked by the absence of shame.

  • My childhood was almost haunted by shame and stigma but I didn’t let it overpower me or weigh me down. I managed to overcome its strings. It wasn’t easy because when i remember the unpleasant things that happened to me, I shed tears and deem myself contaminated.
    But I’m happy today that I’m a living testimony. I’m an overcomer! Glory to God!

  • Onyinyechi

    Thanks for this post. I really learnt a lot from it. Sometimes, shame can come from seeing yourself as not fit for anything, looking so down on yourself. It’s good for somebody to be proud of what he/she is, to appreciate what God has put into him/her.

  • Emeka joy

    Thank you ma for this wonderful post. I have never been more encouraged than this. So I can finally overcome shame, praise the Lord!

  • Lilian

    My own experience with shame affected me psychologically, I felt God missed a part in bringing me into this world, I was really going through a phase. As I grew older and through God’s proclamations, I began to understand things happen for a reason.

  • Nice post, why should I live in shame since christ has borne all my shame for me.Whatever we do without acknowledging christ is a highway to error.

  • Nwalutum Chisom Doreen

    We should not live in shame for God has given us the spirit of boldness not shame

  • Nwalutum Chisom Doreen

    We should not live in shame
    For God has given us the spirit of boldness

  • Ugwu Ifeanyi Kingsley

    We should never live in shame of who we are as Christians. No matter the difficulties and experience we might have faced or had. God allowed himself to be beaten and crucified on the cross. Highest of all shame borne for us. So we got no reason to be ashamed as long as we’re worshipping him.


    Shame is a life destroyer, everyone makes mistakes in life. No matter what one has done, don’t not allow shame to rule your life. God is our strength.

  • Oba Cindy Biobele

    A very educative and encouraging story. We should never let the shame lingering from things we did or were done to us in the past weigh us down. We not be sin-conscious but Jesus-conscious.

  • Jibulu Ngozi

    I had always misunderstood shame and guilt to be same but now I know its not. The part of this post that has got me thinking is “friends, if you are tempted to believe the lie that to value yourself is prideful think again! If you are tempted to believe that it’s godly to embrace shame,think again!

  • Egenti Blossom Mmesoma

    Do not let shame hold you back from achieving greatness.You are more than what people say or think.God has wiped away all your sins and made you new again.

  • Egenti Blossom Mmesoma

    When christ died,he died for our sins,so we should endeavour to desist from all those sins.That he had already shed his blood is enough for us to get rid of all our sinful acts and try as much as possible to emulate him.

  • Chukwurah Nnenna Chisom

    Shame;it’s still a problem most believers go through. Christians should know their right in Christ and not allow the devil to take charge of their emotions cause he has no right over us !!! Nice post ma

  • Chigbu Pamela Chinwoke

    We should not let shame overshadow us from doing what we want to do due to maybe what might have happened in the past. Moving forward without caring what other people might think is the way of life

  • Ugwuja Deborah Tochukwu

    This post has helped me understand the difference between ‘guilt’ and ‘shame’. There was a period on my life when I was ashamed of myself. God brought me out of that phase and I praise him for it.


    Living in shame is indeed the projection of the wicked one(devil),trying to tell us what we we are not…the Bible made us to understand that we are the rightousness of God by Christ Jesus.. Anyone that believes in Him shall not perish….we are born anew in Christ… So we need not to judge ourselves about our past..Jesus did it all for us……

  • Okafor charles c.

    truly we dont have to live in shame because it can kill dreams and make people to live in pain and fear.we should pray to God to remove any form of shame in us.

  • Okoli Ezinne Juliet

    Shame is just like death, it snatches away what we value but we should not keep our guards down since we have God who is the ultimate. Thank you ma

  • Nnamani Sylvia Onyedikachi

    This is very inspiring as it talks about shame in the lives of Christians today. Christ had died that we might no longer live in shame. Also we should always pray and ask God for the grace to overcome shame.

  • Ugwoke Somto Promise

    Shame actually deprives us of opportunities because of us thinking that we are sinners and are already condemned. Therefore standing tall and casting away shame with the knowledge that Christ is there for us is very imperative for our spiritual growth. Very nice indeed, Karissa.


    This post is really educating and inspiring. lots of people battle with shame. sometimes it could be as a result of something you did wrong or an attribute you’re ashamed of or even about one’s skin or nationality. you don’t have to live in shame because God that created you the way you are has a reason.

  • ikebudu juanita

    Shame silently kills and it comes into one’s life slowly without one been fully aware of it, it’s a feeling that comes when you are incapable of meeting your required task in terms of finances, academic excellence, marital affairs etc but Christ came to give us rest and fulfillment even in our inadequacies we still live a happy life

  • Abugu faith Chinecherem

    Thank you Ma for this post. Shame has really dealt with many people, but with this post they will understand that God took our shame away and they are clean.

  • ikebudu juanita

    Shame silently kills and it comes into one’s life slowly without one been fully aware of it, it’s a feeling that comes when you are incapable of meeting your required task in terms of finances, academic excellence, marital affairs etc but Christ came to give us rest and fulfillment even in our inadequacies we still live a happy life.

  • Catherine Anokwuru

    God is love and when we have God we learn to love ourselves and not live in shame, for Christ has taken our shame with him and left it at the cross.

  • Abasiofon Nkem

    Thanks for this motivation. I have been in this situation of letting my shame go. The more I tried, the more questions that obstruct this process strike my mind. With this post, I can overcome all fears as a child of God.

  • Onyekachi confidence chimamaka

    Shame keeps one in stagnation .when we embrace God his love and mercy sets us free from shame’s grip

  • Epunam obianuju

    shame has limited a lot of people from achieving their destinies shame is a very bad thing. One could end up making mistakes in life all because of shame. I solemnly advice those suffering from shame to look up to God who is the healer of all wounds to heal and set them free.

  • Eze Nnenna Uzoamaka

    Shame, it’s a very toxic thing in our lives. It takes us far from understanding and knowing who we truly are in Christ Jesus, it makes us dwell only on the negative side of things. It’s indeed a destroyer of lives. Rips off our mind and rubs off the bad on it….
    But thank God for Christ, who has taken our shame away…. In Christ Jesus, we are a new creation.

  • Egenti chidimma Jennifer

    Our past should not be a determinant to our future… They should rather be stepping stones to greater things

  • Nnamani Ruth nnenna

    A very educative post…. Our shameful past should not kill our zeal for great things . God is merciful and he will help us

  • kelechi collins

    Living in shame hinders us from unmasking our full potentials and also achieving what God has in mind for us. We should never be ashamed of who we are but rather shout out loud and be contented that God made us like himself.

  • What wonderful post this was. You really inspired me. Thanks Karissa.

  • Andeshi Monica

    Thanks Ma for touching on this topic because it is one of the major problems facing the world today, it has even led to people refusing to pray because they feel too filthy to talk to God.

  • Thanks Ma for touching on this topic because it is one of the major problems facing the world today. It has even led to people refusing to pray because they feel too filthy to talk to God.

  • Okere Jovita

    Living in shame can hinder God’s plan for us,he made us and he knows our weaknesses,it’s just left for us to accept who we really are.

  • harriet


  • harriet

    Nice post
    we really need to accept who we are

  • Nwachukwu chidinma

    God is love and when we have God we learn to love ourselves and not live in shame, for Christ has taken our shame with him and left it at the cross

  • susanhomeschooling

    Shame is crippling. I know a woman who is so trapped in it that she can’t get out. It’s like she feels condemnation all the time, like she ruined her life. But there is always redemption. God can forgive all. And then we are clean. We can always be clean.

  • Euphemia Nwele

    “It would go even deeper before it grew wide.

    It whispered lies to me about who I was and who I would become”
    This is the mere fact about shame or guilt. It tells you what to believe about yourself, too bad. Looking upon God and the gospel directs out paths and pulls us away from mistakes.
    Our pride, joy, excellence and trust should come from God, no one else should tell you who you are.

  • Eze chinyere

    Well said. This will definitely serve as an inspiration to many out there. I’m glad to learn that the only thing that matters is what God says about us and who he says we are. Let us continually bear this in mind and not wallow in shame or self-pity. Thank you for this inspirational write-up..

  • Arene Ifeyinwa Ketochukwu

    God can change your story of shame and guilt to glory if you can come to him. It does not matter what we have done. At the end, you can tell your story to others to get inspired and blessed.

  • ifunaya chukwuemeka

    shame!!! i think this is how i feel each time i go far away from God, and is still happens now, but God help me. i can only be adequate in God i know now and so it helps me keep my head high and gets me going every time. thanks for this Ma

  • Paul-kayode praise c

    Always remember whatever it is you may be going through God is always by your side, as many people going through tough times, talk to someone or pray, don’t do anything drastic esp nowadays where youth take their lives

  • Ezike winifred udochukwu

    I have done some things in the past that made me scared or ashamed of been in God’s presence ..,,but with the help of a friend i found out that his grace was sufficient and no matter how unclean we think we are he will still welcome us ,,,i really love this post thank u ma?

  • Ejiofor Emmanuel

    This is one of the best message I have seen. Don’t be ashamed of your background because God is here for you. He cares for you. Just come to him.

  • Joseph joy

    So many Nigerian women are victims of shame, maybe because of the mistakes they made in their youth. They allow it to affect them mentally and spiritually and it deprives them of a lot of opportunities. There’s no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.


    An enlightening post MA, people confuse shame and guilt a lot.Guilt is the remorsefulness one feels of the wrong doings in the past. But if the lord forgave the prostitute then it is now left for us to come out of the guilt or shame and put on the full armour of God for he didn’t judge or condemn us.forward ever backward never.i was blessed by this ma.


    A nice one ma,for he paid everything on the cross of calvary therefore am a new person.guilt and shame are crumbling forces that could bring down a person, it could lead to depression,discouragement,pessimenism in everything we do.shame is the feeling of improper misconduct.we as human have been sinners right from day one of creation( adam and eve after eaten the apple) But he have saved and forgave us if he the creator has freed and forgave me I am indeed freed and is now left for me not to think of those things again.


    One thought of all I did in the past was enough to plunge me into turmoil and despair but for his saving grace I am freed and instructed never to do it again. Shame can come in any form and manner, sometime it can be in form of not being worthy, but if he has created us in his likeness and manner we should take that feeling off our minds and move forward. Thank ma I was enriched.


    Shame is a force that could cripple one for is a declining force.but we must rise up for if we cast our self how can we receive salvation. For if we tarnish our image and forget that Christ died then it would have been for nothing.for shame can cripple any chance in us to succeed or stand up from our predicament but we have a father in Christ who listen and is ever ready to forgive us.nice one ma.

  • Nnamani ruth nnenna

    This is a very wonderful post…. Shame will destroy our self esteem and make us feel less of who we actually are but God has freed us from all of that and we are new creations in his sight. His grace is enough for us all.

  • Precious

    To err is human, no one is perfect. It’s our imperfections that make us human and keep us thriving for perfection. Among these imperfections lies guilt and shame which often leads to self hate. It’s easy to hate something especially when you have facts backing you. It’s easier to hate yourself when you feel you have been used or lost or dirty.
    Shame and guilt are inevitable but we can overcome it by prayer, therapy and building our self esteem

  • Nkwocha Chibueze Innocent

    We do not have to continue to live in shame, Christ bore it on the cross, Christians especially have to learn how to overcome shame.. and embrace the new life in Christ

    “Focus on the word of God because what you focus on is what you become”

    God help us

  • Agnes

    So so edifying. As Christians we need to shed unnecessary weight and sin that bog us down spiritually and focus our attention on Gods redemption from all guilt and on his word. God bless you ma for sharing.

  • Shame is a painful emotion responding to a sense of failure to attain some ideal state. Embarrassment has often been characterized as a mild form of shame. It results from trivial social transgressions (e.g., tripping, belching), where the person doesn’t feel that such events involve the self.The most shameful on this earth now is dying on someome’s else.but God died for us so we have life.If God were to be man he wouldn’t have tried such.
    why living in shame while God has the whole shame?
    Thank you Jesus for a shameful death on my behalf…..I am with no shame..AMEN


    An innovative and educative one ma.shame and guilt are feelings that can hamper, hinder the plan of God in our life, but if he didn’t condemn us, who are we then to condemn ourselves ourselves. Nice one ma,I am sometime down by the things I have done in the past but after I know he died for me and I know am a new person what else would I do than to be cheerful and be of good courage.

  • Abaraonye, Chidinma Blessing

    I felt shame when I was writing and rewriting my O’level examinations. Shame is a terrible thing because it makes you go into your shell and not to believe in your self that you can do better. It hides possibilities from you.
    Every part of this teaching enlightened me. I appreciate ma for this.

  • Ossai Chidimma Linda

    shame! It is true, sometimes we feel less worthy and we don’t know the way forward but in it all, God showeth mercy.

  • Mirian Ndawe

    Good one, shame is something so deep that it can mar a person. I always felt shame whenever I fail at something, but growing up I realized that failure doesn’t mean you’re not good enough but rather it means that you need to sir up and work harder.

  • Honestly speaking, living in shame is like living in bondage. We should learn to let go of the shameful past and focus our attention at the future because there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel.

  • Omenma Ndidiamaka

    You don’t have feel ashamed for your inadequacies. Whenever I feel ashamed for my lackings, I appreciate God for what I have. Embrace God and you would realize you were created with perfections

  • Ikwuakam Oluchi Francisca

    I no longer live in shame because I am a new creation. Thank you for revealing some of the things God says about me, thank you Lord for loving me the way I am.

  • Dike Gerald

    inasmuch as we are new creation, we should have no shame, rather be preoccupied with whom you are- a co-heir with Christ, and live towards it’s end. Even when we err, we should rather have contrition and not shame.

  • Ogechukwu ukwuani Cynthia

    Shame is not a good thing, but with God our shame becomes fame.. With God our disgrace becomes grace. This is because God is involved. He knows how to deal with our problems when we take them to him.


    Shame and guilt are heavy problems. But the Bible says if the Son of God sets you free, you are free indeed and it was made possible by his blood. People tend to draw back or plunge more into sin when their guilt and shame become too much. Shame and guilt can hinder a lot of things if God does not intervene. We should always look up to the author and finisher of everything. Great one, ma!

  • Augustine elaigwu

    when we live in shame, it seems that we have no redeemed and that we are forever guilty. so to appreciate our Christ for his sacrifice, we should live in joy of thanksgiving.


    We have been liberated by his blood and sacrifice.shame and guilt have nothing against us as far as we are washed in his blood.we can never be tormented by sin,sickness and Satan.all guilt has been taken away.

  • Adebanjo Adenike Rebecca

    Whatever circumstances we found ourselves that bring shame, dwelling in that shame is just the peril that will hinder the accomplishment of one’s goals. May God help us to live beyond the scars of shame.

  • Ajah Ugochi Agnes

    The moment we come out of our shame and realize God’s love for us, things begins to manifest in our life. The Bible says, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” – 2 Corinthians 5:1. Our shame and sins have been taken away. In God, we can begin anew we just have to come out of our shame.

  • The devil can use you feeling too low of yourself as a tool to self destruction.we don’t need to live in our past mistakes and inadequacies

  • Obiogwu Onyinye

    Shame makes us condemn ourselves even when God doesn’t condemn us. Even in our guilt and shame, let’s try go even closer to God, because the Bible tells that there is joy over one repentant sinner than a thousand righteous men. Praise the Lord!

  • Igwe Chioma Esther

    God has called me into His light. I am no longer a slave to shame. I have been bought with a price. I am too precious to be ashamed.

  • Igwe Chioma Esther

    God has called me into His light. I am no longer a slave to shame. I am too precious to be ashamed. My Shame and guilt was bore on the cross. In Christ I am free from shame. This is my confession.

  • Chilaka Vivian

    Shame comes as a result of not knowing who God says we are. It’s only God that can tell me the real me.

  • Okpechi Amarachi

    Shame has really prevented a lot of people from being what they were predestined to be. Because you find yourself not too good enough, you tend to hide in your she’ll.

  • Ibeh Lorretta Chiamaka

    Shame is a feeling of guilty but through God’s love, we are made free from every guilt, therefore we don’t have to live in shame anymore

  • Duru Gift Onyinyechi

    Our qualification comes from Christ Jesus. The devil is only looking for whom to devour by putting those things in which Christ has used his blood to wash away. We are children of God and joint heirs to his kingdom. This post throws light of the assurance of our salvation. Thank you ma.

  • Chukwumalume Ozioma

    Shame hinders us from excelling in the places we are supposed to. Jesus has however, taken us all under his wing such that the burden of shame and all forms of reproach are lifted and we are new creatures in Christ.

  • John Adoyi

    It’s really thoughtful for you to post this. I really needed it and it’s really educative and inspiring.

  • Chukwumalume Ozioma

    Christ has taken me under his wings and there is no room for shame and reproach anymore. I am a new creature!

  • This is very educative, shame shouldn’t be our weakness and we should be ashamed of doing things which are unworthy. Thanks for this pieces Ma.

  • Ibrahim Mariam

    Wow…that has always been my point of view that my sins are too much until I understand the scripture (2cr5:17)and then I begin to acknowledge my forgiveness and righteousness in Christ.

  • Olusola Esther

    Shame makes you feel like you’re useless, it makes you want to doubt God, it makes you feel less of who you truely are and it comes from the devil.

  • Chukwuemeka uchechukwu pepertua

    Shame can make you isolate yourself from is a nice and inspirational writeup for anyone that is in this mess call shame. God bless you ma!

  • Nwokedi Fortune Odinakachi

    “Guilt draws you closer to God as it’s an acknowledgement of wrongdoing, while shame even takes you farther from him”. This is really encouraging; God’s blessings!

  • Nnaji Esther uchechukwu

    Believe me shame is very toxic, some times it makes you wish the ground could just open and sink you,
    This post just reminded me of GS presentation because I was scared and shy But right now I’ve seen more reasons to be bold and confident…

  • Amalu precious

    In this whole piece, I’ve found more reason to know that knowing Jesus is alot more than just knowing him… it’s about letting God take charge of EVERYTHING” and letting go of ugly pasts.

  • Ossai Judith mmesoma

    We should desist from anything that will keep us away from God especially shameful things because shame brings low self esteem and makes us feel uncomfortable. Thank you ma

  • Charles Flourish Iheoma

    God really thought about everything when he gave out his word. This story reminds me of a song by Lauren Diagle.. “you say I am strong when I think I am weak and when I don’t belong, you say I am yours ….”

  • Sunday Chenka Esther

    Indeed I am a new creature.. No more shame, no more pain because Jesus have taken it all. Shame, guilt and sin are all satan’s accusations and traps to frustrate God’s children. The old is gone! I am born anew. Value well received!!!

  • Nwafor Cynthia Chinenyenwa

    Running to God giving ourselves completely to Him is the best thing we can ever do. We shouldn’t let shame draw us away from him

  • Victoria Chigere

    It takes the grace of God to overcome shame. I pray we don’t encounter in any shameful act. Amen!!

  • Nweze Somto Maryann

    Shame is one of the issues people go through but there is no rejection in the presence of God. Always try to move forward in life and believe what God says about you.

  • Chisom Efobi

    Ma, I think shame comes when you feel unworthy, it’s a way of showing contrite for sins.
    I’m often of the view that once I sin there’s no need for me to pray
    Thank you Ma and of course Karissa!!

  • Ossai Joy Adanne

    When you accept Jesus in your life he takes charge of your life maybe your pasts may not be clean but it’s up to you to begin anew.

  • Thank you so much ma for sharing this nice write up with us.
    Jesus took our shame on the cross, He says that those that put their trust in Him shall by no means be ashamed.

  • Omeje Chinenye Martha.

    There is no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus.

  • Maureen

    Shame is indeed crippling, Can result to self doubt and all. Knowing Jesus helps us lift all to him, for he is ready to free and bear all for us. Thank you ma for sharing this.

  • Igboka chidimma

    With Christ by your side you can be able to come out from the shell shame covered us with and be the light we are meant to be.

  • Onuzulike Chukwuebuka Prosper

    If you believe that Jesus Christ died for you, then there is no need to live in shame. His dead has freed us from all shame and disgrace

  • Idoko Charles Edicha

    As Christians, shame is never the way forward.
    Draw your self closer to God and you will be free.


    Shame has limited a lot of people around me, the young girl who got pregnant out of wedlock sees no reason to continue with academics, the young boy who was caught stealing sees himself as a second class citizen and so on, but in JESUS all shame is gone and we are redeemed

  • Ekeh ifunanya Cynthia

    This shame is a serious problem, that can only be solved through the help of the most holy spirit..

  • Nnaji Ozioma Faith

    Ma thank for opening up our eyes to the other kind of shame. They were times when I felt inferior and ashamed because I was short. I never paid attention to the other amazing qualities God gave me. Whenever I saw people who had height, jealousy would envelop me. A number of times, people even tried to bully me because they knew I couldn’t fight back . it became a problem for me back then but I summoned courage and made up my mind never to be intimidated by anyone. Now no matter the insults you hurl at me concerning my height, I never feel bad. I don’t let it get to me. I thank God for the courage and wisdom to over come that phase of life.

  • Chidiebele Ojuanu O.

    Jesus had borne my shame upon the cross, no more guilt. In Christ, I’m totally free. Hallelujah 🙌.

  • Okoewa favour

    Shame is there to drive us away from God but we should draw closer to God to overcome it. This is very inspiring.🥰😍

  • Nnadi Blessing Ngozi

    Shame brings down one confidence, living in shame is as bad as living with illness that destroys. Shame kills self esteem

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