PRAYER PARTNER (SHORT STORY)

Intro:
This is a fictional story about friendship, prayer partnership and some challenges that come with knowing each other’s secrets. Do comment and share the story when you are through. You are blessed!

PRAYER PARTNER

I’m starting to rethink this whole prayer partner thing after the nasty experience I recently had with my friend, Vivian. It began on our very first meeting two Saturdays ago. After exchanging our prayer points (to familiarise ourselves with the issues to be prayed for), she pointed to the third item on my list, a frown on her face.

“What is that?” she asked, with her scowl in place.

“Incontinence,” I read from where she pointed. “You know, like when the stuff gets out before you let it.” I was not really comfortable having that conversation.

“I know what it means,” Vivian pushed on. “What I don’t understand is what it has to do with you. You’re less than 20.”

“Well, I have it. Not the badly leaking kind, but the smell and slight discoloration are there in my underwear; from the rear, you know.”

“You need a doctor. It could be something bad, something that could get worse.”

“I doubt it. Well, not unless I take that route again.”

“So you know how you got it.” Her look said, “It’s all your fault then.” I certainly didn’t like being judged and I wasn’t obliged to satisfy her curiosity, but I felt an explanation will gain her sympathy and we could join hands and pray earnestly about the issue.

“Before I got saved, I went out with this guy who liked to try different things sexually. I wanted to please him so much, so I let him do the anal stuff sometimes.”

“Yuck, that is so disgusting!”

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(Related: 7 Proven Guidelines For Godly Dating)
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Although I wasn’t expecting Vivian’s approval, that was hardly the response I anticipated.

“Okay, that’s enough! Can we get on with the prayer now?” We were on the verge of quarreling, and what sort of power could our prayer have if we were not in agreement? So I added, “That is all behind me now. I heard someone preach that God could fix our broken parts, so I decided to include it in my list.”

“Sure, He can do all things,” Vivian affirmed. “But have you considered surgery?”

“My goodness, it’s not that serious really. It’s very, very mild incontinence. I just want to be perfect again in that orifice but I’m afraid that if I let doctors start poking around down there, they might do some more damage.”

Vivian shrugged. And we went on to pray with the ACTS formula we learnt in our fellowships: Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and finally, Supplication.

Vivian and I are interns from different schools, serving with a computer firm in Owerri. We had been drawn to each other because of our modest dressing and zeal to learn. While other interns were more interested in enjoying themselves, we were always punctual to work, handled our assignments with thoroughness and put in extra hours when necessary.

I invited her to my church after our third week at work. It was a youth programme on doing exploits through prayer. One of the guest preachers emphasised that when it comes to prayer, two are better than one. She identified the benefits of prayer partnerships between spouses, siblings and friends. It all came down to joining forces to get the answers we need from God. There and then, Vivian and I decided to become prayer partners and meet every Saturday by 2 p.m. at her house on Wetheral Road before parting for choir practice at our respective churches by 4 p.m.

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Although her questions about my incontinence had initially introduced some awkwardness into our first meeting, I thought everything was okay and we could continue our partnership. But in the week that followed, Vivian seemed kind of cool towards me. We were paired to work with different staff of the firm on a programming project, so we neither had time to chat nor I to guess what caused her sudden reserve.

Last Saturday, I knocked on her door and it took a while for her to answer it. She’s usually home alone on Saturdays because her parents are traders and her older siblings are married. Plus she should have been expecting me. When she finally opened the door to their flat and let me in, I didn’t need to be told that I wasn’t welcome. And I got mad, really, really mad, because it dawned on me what her chilliness was all about.

“I take exception to your attitude, Vivian. This is childishness and silliness rolled into one.” She just ignored me and sat staring at the TV which I wasn’t going to let her watch. “You should at least have told me how you feel so that I don’t waste my time coming here.”

“I’m sorry, I hoped you would take a hint. Me and you praying together isn’t such a good idea.”

“Really? And why is that? Because you think you’re better than me? Because I admitted I had anal sex, now I’m the devil?”

“Stop saying sex. It’s not something you should be saying anyhow.”

“I’m not saying it on the street. I’m talking to you, my supposed friend and prayer partner. And by the way, it’s better to talk about it than pretend you don’t want it and think about it endlessly.”

“I know you’re not talking about me!”

“Oh, am I not? You think you’re better than me, because I had anal sex. You think being a virgin gives you bragging rights. But you’re only a virgin physically. Mentally, you’re just as bad as I am. I mean, as bad as I WAS.” I paused to let that sink in. “Masturbation,” I recalled part of her fifth prayer point. “You do it every night, remember? And you fantasise about different guys. So, who’s really better than who?”

“You’re using my prayer point against me.”

“Only just as much as you’re using mine against me.”

“But how could you let someone do that stuff to you?” She cringed as she said this.

“Listen, I don’t want to discuss that anymore. I think it’s a good idea to stop praying together. Let’s just promise each other we’ll keep our secrets secret.”

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“Anna, please sit down.” That was a surprise. “I think I took this thing farther than I should. Maybe this was a test and I failed. Can you forgive me?” I was taken aback. Having been put on the defensive, my goal was to hurt Vivian as much as she’d hurt me and get the he#l out of there. I wasn’t quite prepared for a reconciliation. And I was no longer in the mood for prayer.

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“Can we just skip the prayer for today?”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea. I think we should settle this matter now and forget it ever happened.”

“Well, I’m not quite ready for that,” I replied, and left for home. I was so angry I missed choir practice that day too.

Today is Monday and I’ve avoided Vivian so far. I’m no longer angry. In fact, I feel ashamed that I let such a small matter get me overwrought. But it didn’t seem so small then. And I still haven’t decided if I still want us to be prayer partners. Not sure I want any of my secrets out anymore. Neither do I want to be in on anyone else’s. For as Samuel Johnson averred, “To keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect others to keep it is folly.”

-The end-

Ⓒ Edith Ugochi Ohaja 2018

Hope you enjoyed the story. Do stay for a chat.

I hope you don’t think Anna’s stance means we don’t need prayer partners. That will be like throwing away the baby with the bath water.
But what kind of ground rules could we follow if we want to get the best out of our prayer partnerships?

Who do you think would make the best prayer partner: sibling, spouse, parent, friend, work colleague?

Do you have any advice for Anna and Vivian arising from their words and actions in this story?

You are richly blessed in Jesus’ name.

❤️

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I am a university lecturer. I teach Mass Communication, mostly writing courses like Feature and Interpretative Writing, Magazine Article Writing and News Writing, and let’s just say I’ve been doing this for a long time. As you have probably guessed, I am a born-again Christian.

314 thoughts on “PRAYER PARTNER (SHORT STORY)

  1. Guess I’m the first to see this. These experiences do happen daily, and I’m really not of the opinion of having prayer partners. Many persons are quick to judge others without even looking critically at themselves, knowing they are not perfect. Though they say a problem shared is a problem half solved but most times, sharing ur problems with the wrong persons gets them out of hand. I believe sharing ur prayer points and problems with someone higher than u spiritually like ur pastors or the priests is the best.
    It was a nice story, ma. I enjoyed it.

  2. i sincerely buy the idea of a prayer patner…from the story line, they both didnt seem to understand themselves a whole lot, they just seemed to like each other, because they wore the same outlook..which is one of the deceptive things..

    prayer patners are the best, only when you patner with someone you understand a whole lot, a prayer patner can turn a sister, and can become more than a sister..

    let’s beware of surface likeness, it goes a long way in marooning relationship…rather let’s venture into building our relationships…it’s step by step..you won’t even know when you both become convenant sisters or brothers…(remember the story read “they decided to be prayer patners”) and that is a very uncomfortable thing….real prayer/convenant sisters do not decide…they just engage naturally.

    • Thanks a lot for your lovely comment, Chinalurum. And thanks for drawing attention to the fact that they decided to be prayer partners. I think if they had bought the idea of having prayer partners and individually prayed about it, God may have chosen someone else for each of them. That is not to say that when God is behind a relationship, problems will never occur. What matters is handling them with a Christlike approach. Abundant blessings on you and yours, my dear, in Jesus’ name.

    • I think what Vivian did was so bad after all the bible says leave all judgement to God that we shouldn’t judge others so as not to be judged…. BUT in any case I don’t think it would be wise for them to continue being prayer partners because if Vivian could react this way then it means she thinks she’s better and I know for sure that prayers are for sinners not saintly people.. Anna should look for someone else let, anyone else who knows that they are not worthy and that all have fallen short of God’s grace and for someone who is non judgementalike. . It could be a blood sister, work colleague, normal friend, parents anyone but ithe should definitely be soemone who isn’t so self righteous like vivian

    • it’s not right to use people’s secret against them, it is very wrong to use a person’s secret against them. who is she to judge Anna , Vivian didn’t act like a child of God. she should have tried help Anna find a solution to her problem and encourage her too afterall she is not only her prayer partner but should have been a friend to her too instead of avoiding her for trying to ask God for Forgiveness and guidance

  3. Prayer partners are good even for personal development, for iron sharpeneth iron. But you must check the mental and spiritual strength of your partner before saying some deep stuff be it wife, parent, brother or colleague. How do you do that? Tell them one little secret at a time and watch how they handle it before you proceed to a deeper one. As for Anna, go back to your partner. You guys have just sealed the friendship by reconciling with each other. Now you will feel more comfortable around her than any new partner you want to choose now.

  4. I know we all have issues. But one thing aside the things I hate is one, being mentally immature and then you cement it with “self-righteousness”, which I refer to as stupidity. Yeah Vivian, the whole thing of anal sex really sucks and pre-marital sex or what Vivian forgot in her cupboard “masturbation”. But then there is something Christians call “love”. If not, Jesus won’t have let the sinner woman clean his feet. Fine, we all have weaknesses but we should know how far we should express them. Some don’t take explanations and paint all Christians black.
    This is beginning to matter to me anyway. Prayer partnership is good and I advise it. But with time, I have realised that humans are fallible. After scrutiny, I can relate to you what I wish we should pray for me. Without that, please leave my problems to me cause I have Jesus any way.
    Really, reconciliation is advisable for both, though it will take time. I pray the grace and love of Jesus on you both. Amen.

    • A bit harsh at the beginning, but you have some good points in your comment. A big bouquet of blessings to you in Jesus’ name.

  5. I think people should learn not to judge, even the bible admonishes us not to judge others so as not to be judged. As the bible rightly tells us; love covereth all sins and when we learn to love, this world would become a better.

    • Yes, we shouldn’t feel we are better than others simply because of their past. We are new creatures when we give our lives to Christ. You are favoured in Jesus’ name.

  6. Well…. I had a good laugh with this one. Babies, dats how I’d refer to them. Great intentions, beautiful hearts but lacking in spiritual maturity. On a personal note, I’m not so big on prayer partners but I believe in mentors especially so I’m confident I’m undressing before someone whom I’m sure can understand the process and prayerfully join me in hemming my rags bag on. I also agree with the line of thoughts that two strangers cannot just wake up to the responsibility of being prayer partners without first connecting. Well… To each its own. It’s such a beautiful story, ma. Thank you.

    • Young people make a lot of mistakes. If such people remain friends for long, they’ll probably laugh at the immaturity they displayed in these incidents. Thanks for visiting, Jan, and God’s abundant grace in all you do in Jesus’ name.

  7. Such a beautiful story with a powerful insight.
    I have never had a prayer partner before and even if I do get one someday there are things I certainly won’t tell you and also there will be things I don’t expect you to tell me. Yeah, I can be self-righteous at times and once I notice that I have condemned you, I will feel really bad and that can really depress me and sour our relationship.
    So, I believe there are still things that should be between just you and your God.

    • Yes, we really need wisdom to know what to share and with whom. God can help us get friends with whom our secrets are buried, friends who won’t abuse our confidence. Have a beautiful weekend, Augusta, and remain blessed!

  8. Having a prayer partner is good when you ask God to help in selecting one, becos you shouldn’t just pick a random believer as one or som1 based on how you feel. Having a prayer partner does not mean I would tell the person all my secrets sha, I can test her with some.
    Both of them handled the situation wrongly though…
    In my opinion of who to pick as a prayer partner and looking at the definition of a friend, I would say a Friend is the best option, becos there are some things my parents should not hear.
    Thanks, Ma’am, for sharing. It was a nice read.

    • I agree that we should be careful who we confide in. It’s important to establish some trust as you said before divulging secrets. You are lifted in Jesus’ name.

  9. Just like what Anna said, Vivian was really childish to behave like that towards her prayer partner. Prayer partner is not bad ooo but I think it’s better you pray to have a good one. On the same note, we should really mind the type of secrets we tell people, because they might actually use them against us, just like Vivian did.
    Thank you so much, ma, for this wonderwon story.

    • I guess we learn everyday. I’m glad Vivian realised she was wrong and apologised. It’s important for Anna to forgive and remain friends with her, whether or not they continue the prayer partnership. May God give you friends that stick closer than siblings in Jesus’ name.

  10. Its a nice story, but what I would love to point out is that having a prayer partner is a wonderful thing, but it comes with understanding and sympathy for we cannot imagine what we will hear tomorrow. One advice for them is that what has happened in the past should remain in the past. It’s better that way than for it coming back to haunt you. Well done, ma!

  11. We should be careful of the things we tell our friends because we never know whether they will be our enemies tomorrow.

      • Having a prayer partner is not a bad idea, but I think we should pray first before getting one or better still to be at a safer side get someone from your family or your spouse, someone that may not possibly use your secret or flaws against you. Also we should learn not to judge anyone because no one is perfect in this life. Thank you ma for sharing this wonderful piece.

      • In fidelity of these message I will say having a prayer partner is something of importance but..on a clear note we should focus on a view of prayer strictly on holy desire .prayer points or our intention should be focus on the presence of God…On the question of who will make a good prayer partner? I will say it don’t actually have a fixed personality to have prayer with both friends and family member can suite. The major fact is to concentrate on the core idea which is a reflection and seeking Gods divinity. God bless us all, The maker of heaven and earth.

  12. I prefer praying all by myself. I don’t think I like the prayer partner idea.

    If I eventually ever have a prayer partner, we won’t pray all the time together, my lone time with God will be more than when we are together.

    In some instances though, it all depends on understanding and maturity. If two people are mature enough not to use their inadequacies or faults against each other, then the prayer partner idea won’t be a bad one.

  13. I think we should know people better before making them our prayer partners. A lot of people don’t know how to keep secrets. However, if you realize your friend or sibling that yoy pray with is always looking for an opportunity to use your secret against you, it’s advisable you relay your predicament/secrets to God alone.

  14. Having a prayer partner is something good, but you don’t just choose a prayer partner anyhow. It must be someone who is trustworthy and both of you should understand yourselves well. Not all your friends can be trusted.
    That’s my own opinion tho.

  15. Even in the quest to free the mind and let go of some deep secrets, wisdom is needed. Knowing who to talk to is really important to avoid creating more trouble for ourselves. And on the other hand, understanding people and putting ourselves in their present shoes will help us take rational decision with whatever we hear them tell us out of trust. This story was superb. It caught my attention and didn’t let it go until I finished reading…

    Thanks

  16. Hmm This story is indeed captivating. Am not a fan of this prayer partner thing but that doesn’t mean that I don’t get prayed for by a higher authority on some sensitive issues. I think we should be careful of whom we tell our secrets even if the person is a Christian or not, that he/she is a Christian is not a guarantee that he is not judgmental or that he is not a blabbermouth.
    On the other hand Christians should grow in love, for he that loveth not knoweth not God for God is Love. The love of God I know is not judgmental and for me, that’s the yardstick for measuring Christianity

  17. Finding a prayer partner is good and it should be someone who can lift your spirit so that you’ll always have the zeal to pray. Also, I learnt that we should always stand in other people’s shoes to know how they feel. And not everything about you should be told to people cus you never can tell what evil they have in mind for you.

  18. Even when I get a prayer partner, my secrets remain my secrets. It’s not about the owner of the secrets but about those who you expect to keep your secrets. People might might get things all mixed up and confused especially young believers. So, to avoid being embarrassed, I will just pray my secret prayer directly to God. If He doesn’t answer, them it’s because he doesn’t want to. There’s no rule that says that God answers the prayers made by only two or more people.

  19. It is very important to pray when your heart is right… and putting oneself in the place of a judge doesn’t make one a saint

  20. i think they both are at fault. Although it was settled but i doubt if they can have a pure and clean prayer session as they used to. I have never had a prayer partner that i exchange prayer points with. I wouldn’t want to try either. My dad used to say ” the prayer you pray for yourself is the best for yourself”

  21. Finally, we are all humans. You can’t expect them to always be by your side without criticizing you. As for prayer partner, I don’t really buy the idea, be it my peers or someone higher than me because they will expect you to tell them your weakness which in most cases they use against you.

  22. It is advisable that before you choose a prayer partner you must pray so that God will lead you. A person will chase a thousand but two persons will chase ten thousands… But wisdom is profitable to direct, we must apply wisdom even in telling people our secrets. This is a lesson to all of us… Thank you ma.

  23. Having a prayer partner is very good because, the person helps in building a stronger fellowship wit God.. Not only with God but everything that concerns you. I would prefer a spiritual father to talk with. Friends at some point disappoint, the secret u feel dey can keep will b exposed when there is a misunderstanding between u guys.. so to me the best is to have a spiritual father or mother to guide you abt the ethics of life in general.

  24. I haven’t been in prayer partnership before, but my mom has. And the experiences from such partnership came out not so nicely. We are humans after all, and we sometimes goof. We should have partnerships, yes, but maybe not tell those secrets.
    The best prayer partner for me is your spouse and perhaps your siblings. Friends can fail you. Nice read as always.

  25. I haven’t been in prayer partnership before
    And left for me, I will not try it because that person might end up having a low spirit than me and it will end up being me that is helping his or her prayer life.

    • Oh my, that is not a good reason to not want to be in prayer partnerships. The same way you help someone, someone else will help you. That is how life should be. Cheers!

  26. Prayer partners are meant to help us out of the dark and not to condemn us. Vivian failed immensely in judging Anna, forgetting that no being is perfect…this write up is an eye opener to everyone to be careful on who we confide in with our secrets.

  27. Vivian over reacted without any consideration to the fact that she also has her weakness as a person . It is very bad to judge people with their past because we all have our past to deal with. I think we should choose our prayer partner wisely and our family and spouse should be our number one prayer partners.

  28. What a nice story.
    Having a prayer partner is good but not that Vivian type who can judge because judging you in that sense can’t enhance your spiritual growth but would rather make you to retaliate with your own judgment just like Anna did.

  29. Having a prayer partner is good because most times it makes you to grower higher spiritually especially when your college is very prayerful but in other hands for it to last long you need God’s understanding and guidance because as a human , we are imperfect and associated with personal differences

  30. Lol Vivian is quite a character though.
    She was quick to judging Anna. Having a prayer partner is very good but I’m not of the idea of having one especially if the person is not a relation or your husband or someone you can trust Anna barely knows Vivian in the story and I believe that God answers prayers not matter where and how the prayer is being said.?

  31. I’m not against the idea of prayer partnership, but in our world today people only seek to watch their fellows humiliated, for this reason, I believe that if we have a personal communication with God, we can still be answered.

  32. Anna did the right thing by having a prayer partner (Vivian), but displaying such a secret to a friend(s) is indeed a bad idea because there are certain secrets that are meant to be within if not, they end up causing more harm both physically and psychologically. Thank u ma

  33. Am of the opinion that having a prayer partner is good if you are directed by the holy Spirit . The Best prayer partner is one’s spouse

  34. Judgement is never ours to pass.
    Physical virginity is not always a reflection of chastity.
    We could be virgins physically, but whores at heart.
    But completely disregarding the efficacy of joint prayer because of fear of being judged and criticized isn’t a better alternative.

  35. Most times sharing your secret with your friends is not actually the best because most of them have not experienced your situation, thereby giving you wrong advice.

  36. Your best prayer partner is you
    Just take ur secret to God in prayer
    Human beings can fail at any time but God can not

  37. It is very good to pray together because even our Lord said it in the Bible that when two or more are gathered in His name, that HE will be among them. But it is good to consider the spiritual level and mentality of your pray partner and be conscious of what you say or do with him or her.

  38. I don’t believe in prayer partners just like the situation here they tend to use it to judge you and look at you in a kind of way,if I am to going to have one it will probably be someone I respect spiritually and one who is also experienced

  39. Having a prayer partner is good and it can make you grow in faith(for some people tho) but I prefer praying all by my self because having a lone time with God gives me the opportunity to pour out all I have in my heart and these are things I don’t want a second ear to hear. It’s not that they are bad but u know (some) people can not be trusted. Anna made a right decision by having a prayer partner(Vivian). But what they both fail to do was to observe each other to know if they are really compatible and can make a good prayer team. They just decided to be prayer partners because they took a liking for each other, their modest dressing and zeal to work. Its not in our place to judge or condemn our fellow human being. Thanks Aunty Edith for this story, i couldn’t let go of the story until I was done reading it because it’s an eye opener on who and where we reveal our secrets to.

  40. Having a prayer partner is very advantageous, it’s important. Having a prayer partner will help to build your spiritual and social life, because, praying is not all about talking, it also involves contemplation, meditation and others. In fact, talking is the lowest form of prayer. You can make your secrets known to God through other forms of prayer.

  41. This is a very beautiful piece ma. This particular topic has been an issue to many, because sometimes some people are so sanctimonious and think they are holier than thou and so go ahead criticising others. Personally I think some prayer points should be kept personal even when you have a prayer partner. Thank you ma

  42. I believe that having a prayer partner is nice, but we should be careful in choosing who our prayer partner would be. There are things that are meant to be solely between you and God. Vivian and Anne became good friends because they thought that they had the same goals and views but they didn’t take time to learn themselves and understand what it really entails to be prayer partners. I also think that it is better for your prayer partner to be from your family or your spouse. Vivian I believe was wrong in her outright condemnation and withdrawal from Anne, everyone makes mistakes but we are so eager to judge others without first looking at ourselves or putting ourselves in their shoes. Anne realized her mistakes and made ammends with God which is commendable. Vivian on the other hand was insensitive to Anne’s prayers while she was also praying for something. I also think Anne should forgive her but I do not recommend that they continue being prayer partners.
    This is a very interesting and eye-opening story, MA. Thank you!

  43. We should not condemn or use someone’s sin to judge others just like Vivian did and we should learn how to forgive and forget when he or she has realized his or her mistakes. Its also good to have prayer partners

    • Sometimes I wonder whether, people can not be trusted again, I don’t see why Vivian should be so none repulsive about what her friend told her as a friend and sister in the Lord (prayer partner). I think we should learn how to keep people secret and pray for them instead of blaming them. because before a Friend can open up to you, is the sign of trust. Helping one to come out of such situation is God mandate on us, God says “be your brother’s keepers”. Judging someone because the person tell you his or her secret is not good, those who confuses their sins are free from Satan’s yokes, you should think about yourself, you maybe more sinful than that brother or sister, but it’s takes the grace of God to forsake your sin.

      For better prayer partner I can not really say anything about that, although I do pray with my family, but I don’t think I have been able to say all that I have done during our prayers meeting as one of the prayers point. so whichever way a person fine convenient praying with should go ahead.

      For Vivian and her friend, I think they were overreacting, although I will not blame them totally, but only see the trick of the devil in their actions, because Satan hate anyplace the children of God are gathering and praying together, because Satan knows the implications of it; for the Bible says one shall chase a thousand while two shall chase ten thousands. I pray for the spirit of foresight to always take notic of the devil when he wants to come and rubbed us from our blessings.

      thanks ma, more grace and inspiration to you.

  44. Prayer partners are good quite alright, but judging based on my opinion, I feel that the relationship should be based on just being prayer partners, people sometimes take things to heart and later use it against the person involved as well as being easy to condemn and criticize the person’s action which is against the Christian doctrine. Moreover, we humans tend to make mistakes which is a normal phenomenon but these mistakes go well with an apology. This story is indeed what happens in our various prayer societies. God bless you MA for this piece.

  45. Huhn! To have a prayer partner, to me, means having someone who can either be a spouse, sibling or friend, who has first, the zeal or burden to pray. A man with a load of burdens does not stop on the wayside looking for who to laugh at. Likewise a prayer partner with the burden to pray; he does not concerns himself with the other person’s darkest secrets but rather pray them out to God.
    Many christian have failed in their quest of achieving spiritual goals with the wrong person and not enquiring from the lord. They “decide” on a journey without checking for fuel in the engine. Ma, if you will agree with me, having a prayer partner is like choosing a spouse. How? It has to do with the connection of two souls toward God, and if the right person isnt selected, their prayers are hindered.
    I end by saying that in all things, even in choosing a prayer partner, God has to be fully INVOLVED.

  46. People tend to judge based on what they see or hear.Yes! Anna had anal sex but as a friend Vivian didn’t even consider understanding what led to her friend doing that .She just concluded and that made her friend feel bad.At times,there some problems that you don’t really need to go about telling people no matter how close you think you are with the person;it should be between you and God who understands it all.A prayer partner should be someone who understands how it feels to be broken hearted ,sad,sorry and lots more.It should be someone who don’t judge people based on their past.

  47. Huh!
    Let me use myself for instance, there are certain things I like doing alone;reading,praying and problem solving.
    I don’t like engaging into any serious and more private talks with my parents not to talk more of friends(i have my reasons)
    This doesn’t mean I’m against the Idea of having prayer partners,study mates,advicers etc.
    I go with the adverbial phrase; “your best friends are your worst enemies”.
    Most friends you make or some people you partner with are definitely not ready to see you whole again.They want to see you suffer even when you try to make amendments.

    We ought to be careful about things we expose of ourselves to others.
    I’ll advice we take it to God.
    Only God Almighty can make you smile again..

  48. I think the problem here is not about having a prayer partner but allowing people to go through your written prayer point. Prayer points are meant to be written,enveloped and prayed on without anyone going through it because God already knows what’s inside. Some secrets are meant to stay secret forever because people will always talk. My advice to Anna is that she shouldn’t be discouraged in having a prayer partner but she should be careful on what to let out about her life.

  49. Understanding and knowing that one isn’t perfect is essential in a relationship. I actually have a prayer patner and knowing these qualities have really helped us in building a strong bond .

  50. This is why most people don’t engage in Prayer partner because they are afraid there secret will get leaked whenever the friendship get sour.
    Also,if we are to spill our secret,we should ascertain if the other will keep it safe and won’t judge us rather keep it We should take everything to God in prayer.

  51. Having a prayer partner is not bad, but I think a prayer partner should be someone who you can tell your secret, because some of our prayer points are secrets to us. So the best person to make your prayer partner is your sibling or your spouse.

  52. To get the best out of our prayer partnership,we have to put all differences behind, having in mind that praying with a clear mind promotes fast answers to the prayers.anyone could make a prayer partner, it must not necessarily be sm1 from the family, A prayer partner should be sm1 who understands what it means to pray and how important prayer is, someone close to u, who understands you, someone you trust that even when u share a secrete or problem with person, he/she won’t use it against you in future. In the case of Anna and Vivian, the let their emotions and ego take over them, forgetting the sole aim of their coming together as partners in prayer which created a riff between them. My advice to them is to reconcile and forget whatever happened in the past because its now a by-gone, they may not come back as prayer partners but the reconciliation between them is very necessary. WELL DONE MA.Gods grace as you continue.

  53. The idea of prayer partnership is one that has helped my life a lot and my walk with God in the university of Nigeria Nsukka. I literary learnt how to pray more and of course love up on God through the help of a prayer partner. But the truth is, not every Christian who prays and speaks in tongue is qualified to be your prayer partner. In choosing a prayer partner, it should be someone who is spiritually mature, and by spiritual maturity do not just one who’s prays but one who is Worded also. It is God’s word that shapes our character and attitude towards others.

    Also if you must be a prayer partner to someone be ready to love the person enough to accept every thing, I mean every single thing about the person, then I then only would you be able to bear each other burden sincerely in the place of prayer

  54. This prayer partner thing is some that I have not tried before, but I think as Christians we ae not far from God as the word of God said he lives in us.my only contribution to people with similar problems is that God has already forgiven us so.that partner should have been more mature and over look because it is not in her place to judge. So let’s pray for ourselves admit our faults and do it with a loving heart towards one another and God will answer.

    • Having a prayer partner is not totally bad, but atimes human beings changes. Trust nobody, no matter how close the person is to you but we shouldn’t keep grudges against anybody, we should learn to forgive.

  55. I think Anna’s behavior to her friends prayer point was not fair, friends are supposed to cover for one another… having a prayer partner that will use your prayer point against you is not advisable..we should know the kind of people we share our secrets with and the people we make our prayer partners

    • Prayer partnering needs a lot of wisdom and respect from both sides. When both pray for each they come more closer to them they are spiritual interlaced. Their prayer gain more ground

  56. That’s why the Bible says the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak..we have to obtain grace from God to be able to resist temptations.. And the Bible also tells us not to judge..so we should try not to judge people no matter whatever their sins may be.

  57. For Vivian to start giving Ann cold shoulders because of her past, first of all I will say she is not truly born again to begin with because if she truly is, she will know that the Bible says ” old things shall pass away and behold all things shall become new ” that aside she have no right to condemn a person because she is worthy. For Anna, I don’t think its a thing to be ashamed of, if she have really repented and let go of her past then that should be her testimony to others. In addition, choosing a prayer partner should be according to the leading of the holy spirit, you don’t just choose a prayer partner randomly

  58. I don’t think having a prayer partner is bad thing but I think when you want to choose one, choose someone of your calibre.
    However, Anna’s reaction towards the secret of Vivien is not a nice one, if someone tells you their secret, it means the trust you and feel comfortable around you.

  59. If there’s anybody to count on as a prayer partner, it’s God. For as much as I know, Humans are unpredictable in nature. Therefore do not make a silly mistake by disclosing your secrets to your fellow mortals like we had on the post above. Even If they reconcile, it can never be as before they met because both will be using one’s failures against each other . A spoken word can never be dragged back, you can only amend it.

    • I don’t agree that we should never trust fellow mortals and that people will always do the wrong they apologised for. We just need to pray for leading in choosing our friends and prayer partners. Cheers!

  60. Hhhhm,the place of a prayer partner can never be over look. Is just like a man saying because accident occurs on the road, I won’t travel by road again…you see it doesn’t make sense. My pastor will always say everybody has their own dark secrets but you get free when you share them with people…sin grows in secrecy.

  61. I don’t blame Anna for trying to sever ties with Vivian. What Vivian did was a betrayal of trust and i feel Anna’s pain. I’m glad she had the good sense to apologize though but once bitten is twice shy and it may take a while for Anna to trust her again. Let’s see where their relationship goes from here. I hope it doesn’t affect the effectiveness of their prayers

  62. Friendships are about loyalty and having each other’s backs when it’s really needed, not minding whatever may come up or be the case. That’s why the reaction of Anna towards the behaviour of Vivian is justified because Vivian judged and looked down on Anna after been let in on her secret when she too was guilty of the same crime but friendships are about tests whether good or bad. What really matters are the results of the test’s. We hope to see the aftermath of their friendship.

  63. Secrets are meant to be kept and not exposed for your friend to open up to you about her problems is because she trusts you and believes that you won’t judge or make fun of her because we all have our little dark secrets that we don’t want anyone to know about. And because no one is perfect rather we strive for perfection we shouldn’t throw stones at others because we are not as holy as we claim.

  64. According to Edgar Allan Poe, there are some secrets which do not permit themselves to be told. Humans aren’t perfect no matter how godly they appear to be thus if you have a secret that doesn’t permit itself to be told and you really want to share, I suggest you tell God because He wouldn’t tell anyone

  65. In my own perception I think Anna has the right to be angry with her friend Vivian.
    If Vivian didn’t trust her why did she tell her about her secret in the first place. Yes it is true that as humans we suspect being betrayed by our loved one’s, but Vivian’s manner of approach was very abrasive.
    I think Vivian should go and tender an apology for questioning the character of a friend who stood by her when she needed her the most. There is a saying that states that” you should not mind who you praise but be careful whom you blame.

  66. I don’t really buy the idea of having a prayer partner except if its a general issue. Moreover I think its just trust as well as not being judgmental that is needed for it to work out between prayer partners

  67. Before you make someone your prayer partner you surpose to know the person very well; you can tell of the person’s behavior and you trust the person that he/she can keep your secret.

  68. Thinking of a particular “kind” of person as the best partners for prayer is not really obtainable. This actually depends on one’s level of spirituality and how much one knows the truth and principles of the kingdom.
    First of all, it is so wrong to judge a person by his past. That was her past life and she is now a new creature. After all, the bible says; whoever is in Christ is a new creature. OLD THINGS ARE PASSED AWAY AND ALL THINGS HAVE BECOME NEW.If she knew this she won’t consider it as a problem in the first place.
    Secondly, we always find it quick to judge others that commit a particular sin physically meanwhile we do the same thing in secret. So tell me wat is the difference? One has done it physically and the other greatly fantasizes about having sex. After all, the bible says; when you look at a woman lustfully, u have committed fornication with her already. So it will be right to say, God also sees her as being sexual immoral. So why the judgement?
    My advice to Christians is to focus on being perfect and pleasing to God and stop counting on the errors of others..

  69. Lol this one’s are two confused people. They are both judging each other and using “the lords name” to deceive themselves. Please ensure your prayer partner Is someone who is sound

  70. We should not to use our Friend ”s secret against them but we should assist them to avoid that bad or ugly incident for repeating itself in the future and also pray for God assistance in their life and not try to blackmail or look down in them as the worst people on earth.

  71. Anyways,I won’t dispute the fact that it (prayer partnership) is good, but l think we must not enlist our petitions in order to make good prayer partners, even if we must, l feel a family member can make a better prayer partner.

  72. I’m not the type that keeps prayer partners, I don’t even like praying with others, I prefer praying Silently without anyone hearing my voice.

    That doesn’t mean others can’t have one but I really do not see the need to exchange prayer points with someone…is that what prayer partnership is all about?
    I thought having a prayer partner means having someone that will motivate you to always pray, and To practicalise the Bible verse that says “when two or more gather together in my name, my presence is always there”
    I don’t think it also includes exchanging your prayer intentions with someone, it should be between you and your God. You should come together to pray as partners but everyone should say their own intentions to God alone.

    No one is to be trusted. And we as humans are very weak that we may use someone’s intentions and secret against them and even go as far as blackmailing those people as seen in the passage.

  73. For one, I think Vivian should have understood that she had no right to criticize Anna based on the past. They both acted really childish. But then, if they didn’t trust each other, they shouldn’t have made lists that would reveal their secrets. So before choosing a prayer partner, ensure it’s someone you can trust with ur secrets. In as much as Vivian made the first mistake, Anna shouldn’t have taken it further but then anger had it’s toll on her. The story is a lesson for all.

  74. Having a prayer partner is not a bad idea, but in doing this both should ensure that no one judges the other. They should help each other and focus more on taking wise decisions

  75. This is exactly what happens in school fellowships .U wwill be assured that every discussions and prayer points are confidential only to hear it from people’s mouth. Its very hard to divulge secrets nownowaday people use it against u whenever there’s quarrel

  76. A lot of people have made mistakes in their lives which they later regret and repent of. When people tell us about their past mistakes, we shouldn’t judge them on that basis. Rather we should embrace them as friends and pray with them. No one is perfect, therefore, we shouldn’t make anyone feel less than they are because of their past mistakes.

  77. Having a prayer partner is very good but exchanging personal prayer points to pray, is what i disagree with. What vivian did was absolutely wrong. Infact, they both acted very immature and gave each other enough reasons not to trust each other

  78. This is one of the reason why people after sinning keep hiding it, feeling guilty and putting the blame on themselves instead of sharing their problems to be counseled. Always afraid that their secret will be known. Hmm obviously the devil has really come to steal, kill and to destroy and it start from the faithfuls.

  79. Having a prayer partner is actually a good thing, after all, it is written in the bible that “when one or two people are gathered in my name, I am there” thus says the lord. I don’t blame Anna for getting angry at Vivian after all who are you to judge a person based on their past sins. Let he who is without sin first cast the stone. When someone tells you a secret, We should always endeavor to keep that secret.

  80. Having a prayer partner is a very lovely thing, cause you will be encouraged and motivated by your partner but the idea of using your partners prayer point against her is bad it is enough for God not to answer your prayer
    It is even written in the Bible that when two or three is gathered he is in your midst..

  81. For me I think I pray alone when it comes to secrets cos I dnt trust friends, even if I want to disclose my secret it should be to my pastor or Rev father (or spiritual father). Don’t judge for u not to be judged.
    More grace to us ijn ????

  82. To keep your secret is wisdom but to expect others to keep it is folly, Taken.
    I don’t always expect others to keep to what I have shared with them in secret .
    Is not everybody you see u can relate ur secret to most especially people u call friends and prayer partner.
    I rather go to God in prayer alone on what am passing through even also for directions, than talking to people because u don’t know who is sympathizing with you.
    Same advice goes to Anna and Vivian no need praying with each because you both are not comfortable with your secrets .

  83. This story is an eye opener for us to know the people we call our friends and is not bad for us to have our friends as our partners but we have to be very careful of the things we tell them, is not Good for us to condem anyone because nobody is perfect
    God bless u ma

  84. Interesting!! This is a lesson to all of us. I think we should never tell our deepest secrets to other people because we don’t know what could happen in the future that might prompt the them to spill the beans. Even if we feel we’ve offended God, we should ask for his forgiveness and not rant to anyone. I understand Anna’s annoyance and neither of the two was in a position to judge the other..

  85. Though its good to have a prayer partner but always remember that your shadow will one day leave you. Know who you call your friend and who u tell hour secrets to. some are there to judge and live a life of regrets.

  86. Hmmmm… I really don’t know what to say in this case. Well, i just think secrets should be left that way but sharing it with a partner not just one but a prayer partner isn’t a terrible idea altogether. Although, one should be careful of those we choose as prayer partners, they should be matured both in reasoning and in the spirit. Always full of lessons, lovely write up Ma.

  87. Bless you ma. Talking about secret, when you tell someone a secret, its no more a secret and Vivian was wrong telling her secret to a prayer partner who might use it against you.

  88. Nor matter the level you attain in life,just know it that nobody I perfect.Before condemning anyone,mame sure you have examined yourself to a great extent.I personally do not buy the idea of prayer partner because human beings are the least beings to trust.Praying together is not a necessity of God hearing or answering you but praying with open and clear heart.
    Mummy thank you so much for this story that reminds us of our everyday lives.

  89. Prayer partnering is a good thing in the Christendom and helps one build a personal prayer life and God answer prayers most times in a corporate way.
    One of the things i learnt is that we should watch and observe before opening up to anybody, knowing that you cant make anybody your friend or prayer partner based on appearance,cause not everyone can take in what is being talked about. In as much the bible recommend that there are two ways to confess sin. One to a fellow human and to God
    (James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much).

    Thank you ma for this piece .

  90. Inasmuch as it is their similar challenges that prompted them to be prayer partners, Vivian and Anna should understand that effective prayer partnership requires open mindedness, a broken and a contrite spirit that is longing for a change or transformation. Moreover, talking about their secrets so they can pray effectively is not so bad an idea,but when it comes to using it against each other, it is folly.And it is at this point that their maturity and sincerity is tested. Good piece ma.

  91. I wonder why we need prayer partners, when we can always pray alone, and believe with faith that God answereth all things, and it will be done…above all, we should avoid premarital sex of any kind…

    • well, I don’t think having a prayer partner is a bad idea, but I also firmly believe that there are some parts of our lives that should be made open only to God. That some one is your very good friend or prayer partner does not mean that the person can keep all your dark secrets and still treat you with honour and respect. The friend could even use it against you during hot arguments, so it is best to know the kind of things you reveal to people.

  92. Nice one ma, it is necessary that one should have a prayer partner so that some things that bothers us as individuals can be taken to God for solution. in initiating a prayer partner, i think one needs to understand the mindset of the other person first towards God, Satan, money, and life as whole. In all these, I think we should always ask God to help us culture our manner of approach to things and to people.

  93. It’s very nice to have a prayer partner but we shouldn’t limit it to people your going through similar issues with because sometimes we need our partners strength when we are weak and they need our strength when they are weak, it makes us stronger.

  94. Prayer partnership I heard is a good thing even though I don’t believe secrets should be shared because of it, I believe secret should be personal and we shouldn’t judge people because of their past

    • A prayer partner is one who encourages you, reminds you to be hopeful, who stands with you in agreement and not who acts cold towards you because he/she found out about your secret. It is good to have a prayer partner and when choosing a prayer partner, we should try to choose someone who is able to keep your prayer needs private.

  95. Hmm…I don’t really believe in prayer partners because I like to spend my prayer time privately, dough It works out for some people. I rather prefer having a spiritual director who will be there for me anytime there is need to see him or her and it’s not quite safe or advisable to divulge secret anyhow because most times it will be used against us.

  96. Wowwwww. This story is indeed very amazing. To become prayer partners with someone, that person should be someone you can trust and you are sure is not going to be judgmental about issues that will arise during the course of prayers. That someone shares your faith does not mean that the person will sure keep the things that are dear to you sacred.

  97. This is a very nice story ma. I don’t think there is any problem with having a prayer partner. Vivian and Ann fell for a temptation, which they crossed boundary, and to hurt each other. No matter how close your are to your friends, in religion or not, it is not good to tell them your wronged past, because, we humans, fail.

    • The bible says “if my people who are called by my name shall humble themselves to pray and call upon me I will heal their land”.
      So I’ll say that the devil ? came in between them to stop stop them from reaching their goal of praying.
      Prayer is one of the keys that has been given to us by God to signal him if we need or want something, or probably if we are in trouble and we need a Divine help.

  98. There was a particular part of the story that striked me and that is in the aspect of communual prayer this particular story should convey a didactic message not only to friends but to families… Communual prayer is very important as it unites us together as one in the sight of God and also much more effective than the single ..

  99. Vivian really needs to do a self-check once in a while, she needs it badly for her self-righteousness. She seems to be part of the group who believes sin has different levels. Her sin of immoral thoughts and masturbation were to her better than the sin of fornication and sexual perverseness. I believe anyone intending to have a prayer partner should brace themselves to listen to even the most ugly and weird things ever heard of. And they should be ready to share their secrets as well. For me, the best prayer partner should be your spouse. Your spouse is more like your other half and so, there is really nothing much to hide or be ashamed of.

  100. After going through this piece, I believe that the basic things that should be considered in prayer partnership is the direction of the holy spirit and trust, for in most cases, one is redeemed through such a holy act (so it is highly encouraged). But Choosing a random believer (per say) as your prayer partner is more or less dangerous. I sincerely believe that a prayer partner through the direction of God will be one who is worthy to be trusted and spiritually edified. Just as Samuel Johnson said, I will like to put it in this way, “To keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect a random person to keep it is folly.”… Thank you so much for this piece ma, I personally love it…

  101. The write up is an eye openner for all as we all at one point in time in our lives desire partnership.Seeking the face of God in choosing a partner of any sort is essentially paramount lest we find ourselves being lost amidst confusion.

  102. I don’t condemn having a prayer partner but to me, personal issues should be shared between myself and God, no one else

  103. I personally don’t like the idea of prayer partner. I love praying alone and whenever I am praying, I make sure that nobody knows about it except my father who I am talking to because while praying, your sin might be revealed and at the end it will be a thing to laugh about which should not be.
    May God help us all!

  104. What Vivian did was not good. Her action did not ply the route of a true Christian called by grace. Meanwhile this passage is an eye opener not everyone we see in the church can be trust and some times the people we associate with in fellowships are the one that would let our Christian light to go off.
    Remember, Job met his own devil in the Church. Apart from Christianity, human beings are human beings and one they would act as one
    It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. – Psalms 118:8 so mind whom you tell your secrets even in fellowships. More simply you can just tell a person to pray for more grace in your life and don’t mention the what you need more grace for maybe to stop sin, for healing like that of Paul etc.
    I advice every Christian to act in such away that the faith of your fellow would wax strong, do not kill his spirit for there lie the love of the brethren

  105. I feel it’s quite cool to have a prayer partner, at least the bible itself says that iron sharpens iron but having one who can’t even keep your secret is out of it. Believers should study each other and find out more about the person whom you wish to pour out all of your secrets to. Personally, I feel some secrets should only be shared with Christ except you get a leading or prompting in your spirit to reveal it to someone else. Praying together is good but we should learn to pray alone too as it reduces the chances of having such crisis as this.

  106. There should be nothing like a prayer partner at all. I think it is one of the few partnership that does not work.
    I do not know the other person’s problem and he does not know mine and even when we try to share our problems, we may misunderstand ourselves. If any one must pray for me, ask God to grand my heart desires. Knowing the exact favour I am praying for has nothing to do with whether or not God will answer my prayers.

    It has always been the case that information known by more than one man is no longer a secrete. However, since some prayer points are to unpleasant to be made a public service announcement, I advice people to pray alone to God and avoid the disadvantages of sharing your prayer points with another person.

  107. I sincerely love the idea of prayer partner but Vivian does not understand what past is, that she was involved in anal sex before and because of that started having incontinence doesn’t mean you should judge her or get angry with her, that’s her own bitter past which is still hunting her now. Like the Bible says; whatever you sow you will reap, she is actually reaping the fruit of her sins. And through prayer and faith, she would be healed because she is now a new creature and old things are pass away including the effect of her past sinful life.

  108. Honestly Vivian wasn’t right. What’s the purpose of being close to a believer you can trust by the way. In cases like this or even worse you are not to be judged or seen through the bad lens. Fellow believer should learn that everyone has a past, something we all are not so proud to tell. The essence of having Christ is not to be judged again or condemned. The bible said in Romans 8:1 there’s now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus…
    I believe that when you tell someone something in confidence, it should be respected and not used against you.

  109. This is where i tell you to be careful ,but the deed has already been done , so lets act maturely and be wise who will trust and as Christians really trust the holy spirit on sensitive issues like that.

    • Amazing. This often happen in church ND today most times people dont share secrets with prayer partner, they tend to go into benediction, they hold their hands together pray about things not so confidential then resort to a kind of silent prayer holding hands together. Regardless of what ever that happens we need prayer partners Yes.

      For who will make best prayer partner it depends on our various status, but for those in a relationship or marriage your partner should equally be the best for your prayer partner.

      Anna should forgive Vivian and the both should get back as prayer partners.

  110. Maturity is important when choosing a prayer partner.

    It’s annoying how people are so quick to judge when they find out some of the things you’ve done in the past.

    sometimes I ask myself these questions; ”who gave you the right to judge? When did you become ‘assistant holyspirit’ or ‘God junior’? The judge of the brethren are you any better?”

    People should learn to listen to someone’s problem without condemnation

  111. Having a prayer patner is not a bad idea but the problem is your understanding about prayer partner .because during prayers the partners involved are bound to share secrets of their past and also family and academic problems. This things are being confided in God through prayer and is just for his ear alone.
    Vivian didn’t understand the word prayer partner thats why they had the problem.

  112. Having a prayer partner is good thing, let us not just use because of what happened along d line to condemn having a prayer partner, your partiner can be your adviser and a helper when you are backsliding both spiritually and physically.

  113. Having a prayer partner is not bad. It helps to build and bring you closer to your Creator but while picking a prayer partner, ensure both of you think or have the same mind set and beliefs. If not, a lot of issues can arise anytime and as humans, there are some secrets you dont let out to people anyhow because they must surely use them against you. Instead you present your supplications to God and beg for forgiveness.

  114. Having a prayer partner isn’t a bad idea, and your prayer partner could be anybody, your mum, dad, friend or spouse ,it’s all based on trust.

  115. Praying together is really nice but confessing your sins to your partner may not be necessary except if your actions afffected the person directly.

  116. If i had a prayer partner i won’t let out my secrets to them because when you do as humans they would be very much tempted to judge and some people wouldn’t even judge you to your face but will go around castigating you to other people, most importantly, we should all learn to forgive and totally get past situations because that is when real Christianity and maturity shows.

  117. In as much as it is not bad to have a prayer partner, I think it is advisable to keep some personal prayer points which might not be so welcoming by the partner as we all are humans with feelings and reasoning faculties especially in such cases where there are no body of rules constraining one from having grudges and leaking prayer points.of the other.

  118. Having a prayer partner is good but no prayer partner no matter how well you know or trust them is worth sharing such sensitive and personal experience with. It was really bad for your prayer partner to have judged you without taking a stock of her own personal life. I appreciate the way you handled the situation and I hope you reconcile with your prayer partner. Please let this experience guide you as you learn to keep some of your regrets as a secret because they are safer when you have told no one about them.

  119. Both Vivian and Anna are so wrong to use their shortcomings and weaknesses they learnt about each other while praying together,and I believe they should both apologize.also going forward individual prayers should be conducted because God answers everyone’s prayer regardless of having a prayer partner interceding on one’s behalf.

  120. I feel the idea of a prayer partner is not such a bad idea at all,but left to me i still prefer praying on my own,,i also think no one is in the position to judge anyone at all except God ..cause everyone at one time or the other has that dirty past or memory that eats them up.

  121. First, for me to make someone my prayer partner, the person must be my friend I know very well. You must be my close friend first. Not everyone deserves to know your secrets. Vivian’s judgmental attitude was disappointing even in the face of her addiction to masturbation. In all, Prayer Partners must understand each other and help in overcoming each others’ past experiences and lives.

  122. Prayer partnering is really important in ones life. Some people cannot pray alone but prays well when they are two or more. Some people cannot cry out to God when they pray alone but can cry out to God when they partner with people in prayer. But then, we should be careful of what we tell people no matter how much we trust them. But that doesn’t mean we should not trust people.

  123. I really enjoyed the story. I am definitely not a fan of the idea of prayer partners as described here. I don’t mind praying with people but exchanging prayers points with one another is definitely not one I see myself doing. I believe when we pray together for our different intentions that God hears each and everyone of them and that the prayer is stronger together.

  124. Most prayer partners turn to gossip partners. We should be guided at all times, if you came to pray, pray and be gone.

  125. It is really very difficult to have a prayer partner this days because most of them find it very easy to judge without proper investigation. We all should pray for a good prayer partner.

  126. Nowadays prayer partnership is irrelevant when you can just say a sincere prayer and it’ll be heard. I bet Anna is not too familiar with Vivian in the first place because I wonder what kind of “supposed friend” would act in such a hypocritical manner. This is to show you that not everybody you meet in church is God-like. Why not allow your relationship with God be a direct and personal one.

  127. OMG! This is a very wonderful story. Both of them lacked understanding. This story is highly related to what we see nowadays in our churches. We would keep judging one another whereas deep down part of us yearns to do what we judge. They should have put their differences behind. They would have prayed for prayer partners rather than deciding by themselves. I advice that they reconcile. Thank you Ma for this.

  128. I detest it when brethren judge each other’s past.It shouldn’t be so.If we are Christian we believe that old things has passed away and new things are here.Also,we should endeavor to share our problems,flaws ,or a particular sin we are finding difficult to stop to a more spiritual man of God,who would keep it confidentia and not judge us,but counsel us .

  129. It has become increasingly surprising how people make haste to ajudge others, without looking into their own lives first. And many a time, most persons are not saints in what they judge others. This story is a good pointer to what I’m saying. Vivian is never holy of what she’s judging her friend Anna.
    I’ll join my comment with the last sentence, “to keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect others to keep it for you is folly.”
    This I think is the best solution and way to avoid people from seeing what to judge with, as it has almost become the nature of humans to judge.
    Thank you, Aunty Edith. Keep the wisdom burgeoning.

  130. Well in my own opinion, i think I’d love to have a prayer companion because even if I am depressed or sad, praying with a partner will make me feel good and will give me a great comfort.Plus a prayer partner can really motivate you.Having a prayer partner will not take away the bumps on the journey of life, but it can make the experience more tolerable. However, before you pick up anyone for the ride, you should make sure you are partnering with the right person.

  131. Because of these most people prefer keeping their secrets to themselves. Is indeed good to have a prayer partner but if you guys know that you won’t be able to keep each others secrets confidential then was then the essence of having a prayer partner

    • A prayer partner is one who encourages you, reminds you to be hopeful, who stands with you in agreement and not who acts cold towards you because he/she found out about your secret. It is good to have a prayer partner and when choosing a prayer partner, we should try to choose someone who is able to keep your prayer needs private.

      • With this write-up,i’ve come to understand that you don’t just pick a prayer partner the same way you pick a reading partner because the person is brainy . The idea of a prayer partner needs the direction and presence of the holy spirit, not just physical approval.

  132. Christ!!! Soooo unchristian. That’s always my problem against prayer partnership, you could just get to merge with a hypocrite. My prayers? All private and between my Creator and I. Not condemning the act of prayer partnership though, it’s really nice as it aids in building fellowship among Christians.

  133. we have been washed by his blood and by his stripes we are healed.having a prayer partner is not a bad thing.Anna and vivian as prayer partners who were really, truely and genuinely born again should no that the moment they received christ they were new creatures.if jesus would look past the deeds of the prostitute who are we to blame or come out with reaction.As we leave in a society like ours we should confess to God and be sensitive with matters like this with who we share it.If God says judge no man who are we to judge.nice one ma.

  134. having a prayer partner is not bad at all.it is even said when two or three are gathered am in their midst.They bad thing this friends failed to do what that any time they join forces,they bring down their problem by laying it to God.God who sees is able and willing to forgive.they failed to acknowledge God as they creator and judge of all,making themselves judge.this is what gives the devil edge over us.if we are born again we are not condemned so why condemn others.

  135. Prayer of a righteous person can move mountain. Prayers of righteous persons can move mountains. I so much believe in prayer partnership because we can never underrate the gathering of the brethren. We just need to find genuine Christians we can partner in prayers with. I also love the “ACTS” formula.

  136. Having a prayer partner is a good idea because it helps one spiritually. But then it is not easy to find a trusted prayer partner who can keep your secrets and also carry you along spiritually. This story will serve as a guide on how to operate as Christians. It teaches us how not to judge other people, how to be good Christians and finally how to approach matters in a matured way. Vivian acted so childishly after listening to what her friend had to say. That was not a good example of a faithful Christian.

  137. Choosing a prayer partner is not something you do in the flesh and while choosing, you need someone that understands you and will not judge your past but rather help you to to take the right path. Just like the Bible said: judge not so that you will not be judged we should try not to judge other, judgement belong to God and if God have not condemed who are we mere mortals to do that.

  138. For someone to be your prayer partner that is also knowing some of the personal things you tell to God, it should be done with great caution, not just because you believe that person and you share the same ideologies. Some family members aren’t even prayer partners, this is a lesson to be learnt both Vivian and Anna didn’t think this through. Also I believe that when praying together with someone you should never use the person’s prayer point against that because that is the persons personal talk with Christ. Hence, no one is really trust worthy with these secrets except God Himself.

  139. Having a prayer partner is very good, sometimes when you are weak and can’t pray, he/she encourages you and even bring you closer to Christ

  140. We should be mindful of the people we confined in because some secret when exposed can cause a lot of harm and in some cases people even committe suicide. There are some that are better known between you and your God.

  141. It is not really a bad idea to have a prayer partner, most of time people rely on their friends or partners to advice them on issue bothering them. I think Anna and her friend misunderstood each other, no one is a saint everybody has good and bad side of them.

  142. First a partner should understand each other and have common goal and where the reverse is the case, break up.
    Hello! for me;prayer means communicating with my God. I don’t seem it fit having a prayer partner unless in a situation I cannot help myself.
    For Vivian and Anna I doubt if they understand what Matt. 7vs1 says
    “Judge not that ye may not be judged” for Christ sake nobody is perfect rather we work and pray to be perfect.
    Thus, that one lie and another masturbate etc doesn’t make you that lie better than the other, for ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of God Romans 3vs 23, Romans 5vs 12 .
    My counsel is this: let strengthen each other in faith. God help us in Jesus name amen.
    Once more God richly bless and keep you Dr. Edith Ohaja, you are a rear gem

    • Having prayer partners is not a bad idea. However, the person should be mature in mind and reasonable enough to know that secrets should be kept. But spiritual directors these days use people’s secrets to preach in the church. Prayer partners are necessary but I would rather talk to God in the secrets of my heart than to confide in a person am not sure of. However, Anna should have allowed Vivian to make it up to her.

  143. Two heads combined can actually be a solution to problems factors like pride shouldn’t be an obstacle no matter what the problem is. Likewise judging people isn’t a good virtue because we could find ourselves in their shoes someday

  144. Choosing a praying partner is not a bad idea depending on whom the person you confided in for example your pastor. It’s a good idea to involve your pastor or deacon to help you out in prayer because the bible said “when two or more people are gathered in my name” this phrase alone means that chain prayer works faster than anything
    We shouldn’t be judging people because we ain’t all righteous the best thing to do for anyone we see misbehaving is just to pray for the person. We saw in the bible where Jesus told the people that caught a woman in an act of adultery and wanted to stone her ..but Jesus asked them that if you know you haven’t committed a sin before be the first to throw a stone at her they quietly dispersed that shows no one is perfect. Judge not so you won’t be judged

  145. Actually, two heads are better than one indeed, but i think our friends should not know our deep secretes because they could use it against us even in the public. But I prefer spiritually equipped friend to be my prayer partner, the person that can understand me without using it against me any time i offend her, and also she will be drawing me closer to God even in my weakness.

  146. To be honest, I really love this having prayer partner but I’m not in support of the confession part of the ACTS formula. I’d prefer if we confess to a pastor or a mentor instead of a friend who is usually the prayer partner because it’s safer unlike friends that would want to use the confession against you once you stop being friends with them. Thank you Ma for this wonderful piece.

  147. I really disapprove of the idea of having a prayer partner who isn’t family because it brings all the judgements and feeling of superiority when the said partner finds about a dirty secret of ours. We have been given the power by God to call on him in prayer and he will answer us.
    A secret shared is no longer a secret…

  148. I think they were quite childish. Those prayer points are supposed to be their heart cries to God and not notes on a piece of paper. God is the only one who hears your secret and never hold it against you. They over emphasized praying together.

  149. I think this is where spiritual maturity comes in. As a believer, the essence of having someone as a prayer partner can not be underestimated. Yet, we’ve got to know that we are imperfect beings only made perfect through Christ. Anna and Vivian should have understood that as much as they are believers, they still have room to work on their weakness. It is not for us to judge. I had expected Vivian to see Anna through the eyes of love and not condemning her to her face. She should have encouraged her friend to hold on to Christ, letting her know that no matter what her past could have been, she is now a new creation. And that the grace of God is sufficient for her. In that way, there would have been no quarrels between them, rather the atmosphere of prayer would have been generated through love.

  150. The idea of prayer partner is nt bad,but left me, it is better to pray alone.if u must have a prayer partner, let it be someone u trust nd dnt pour out ur prayers Wen u are together. That’s why we have “quiet time”….. . Wen u stay alone all by urself pouring out ur secret prayers to God without people knowing abt it.
    Finally, they should reconcile, coz a good Christian doesn’t keep malice.

  151. Well… I’ve not tried having a prayer partner but from this story, I don’t think I want to because most persons are like Vivian and are quick to judge. I prefer God be the only judge.

  152. I believe that having a prayer partner can help our spiritual life to grow because you have someone to urge you to pray but having the right prayer partner is equally important and we should not be quick to judge people because of what they’ve done, we can try to offer an advice to help solve their problem if we can instead of making them feel bad about it since they already know that what they’ve done is wrong.

  153. Well, I don’t believe in prayer partners anymore since the one I had once Told my mum I once kissed my teacher. My mum didn’t take it lightly with me and since then, I think its better to talk to God directly

  154. Do not use the secrets people tell you against them. They trusted you enough to reveal their inner most space to you. No one is truly ever perfect and we are not without shaddy pasts. Leave judgement for the Lord. The idea of praying partner isn’t to be encouraged because of situations as this.

  155. firstly.. i tink the best prayer partner is ur friend …some one like me , i tell my best friend everything and we dnt judge our selves by our mistakes ,
    secondly , anna and vivian should just forget about the prayer thing
    their minds have been spoiled towards each othe alreadyr ,let them relax ,become real friends before they become partners again
    i thing that the best solution to this ..
    thank you ma

  156. It’s good to have a prayer partner but only when with the right person, and there is no way two people who knows almost everything thing about themselves can become prayer partners because one amongst the two will definitely judge another for his past bad deeds and that may bring problems between the two of them. According to story, it is clearly seen that the both friends can not make a good peer in prayer partnership because they have known alot things about themselves that is unworldly. I believe prayer partners are assigned by God and not by man. What a wonderful story Ma, God bless you.

  157. Having a prayer partner is good. Your prayer partner should be chosen by the leading of the holy spirit. Opening up to someone is not an easy task, you don’t need someone who’s supposed to be your prayer partner/support taking accusatory jabs at you.
    Plus if you feel your story or prayer points are too intimate for another human’s ear, it’s okay just to pray on your own. The father still hears just as clearly as he would if you prayed with a partner.

  158. With this story, I personally think that a parent is in the best position to be a prayer partner.

  159. Prayer partners?
    I doubt there is need for sharing of secrets as prayer partners, there can just be prayer of them commiting the other’s intentions into God’s hands and then prayer is done. Anyway this is a very nice write up that can teach people about sharing of secrets. Thanks Aunt Edith.

  160. Thank you Ma for this wonderful post, having a prayer partner is not bad at all but we should be mindful of some persons we discuss our privacy with, that he or she is your prayer partner doesn’t make him or her perfect.

  161. Having a prayer partner is not a bad idea. It is a good idea in fact. But we should not forget that there are times we are meant to go down on our knees and pray to God on a personal level. Here, we can tell Almighty God our personal worries.

  162. Wisdom is profitable in all dealing ,when you have not known someone enough to let your secret to him or her you get to be ridiculed.there should be a common goal that made people prayer partners it’s not ideal to table you personal issues to someone who does not understand you.if you must let your secret be known ,you should have discussed it with the person before hand and knowing you could confide in such person..if the person is willing prayer can be done

  163. I personally don’t like the idea of telling secrets, but if it’s someone you can trust to not judge you or tell another person then its good. Telling someone a secret tends to lift a little bit of the weight off your shoulders, depending on who the person is to you. Having a prayer partner is good and I think the best prayer partner is family ?

  164. we should be circumspect in dealing with human beings because they are like chameleon! They can change anytime and pity you if you are not the type that can keep secret. Even if you must have a prayer partner, don’t expose everything about you in the name of trust.

  165. When choosing a prayer partner choose while taking a lot of factors into consideration. Would I be judged? Would I be looked down upon? How would we relate outside? A whole lot of people think they are perfect and decide who and who does what forgetting their own misdemeanors. It is better to bring before God ones personal issues if we feel prayer partners aren’t the best.

  166. Sharing your problem with not just a friend but the rightful friend easy tension. A problem shared is half solved and when we communicate with people, it makes us strong and propel us for the things yet to see.

  167. Actually, sharing your problem with your prayer partner is not bad. I believe what led to Vivian’s ill-attitude towards Anna is because she is not spiritually mature. If she’s mature spiritually she shouldn’t have done what she did. Same is to Anna also.
    Now that both of them have realised their mistakes, I will advise them to seek for God intervention in their prayer partnership.

  168. Someone once told me ‘if you want to be happy, learn how to keep your secrets to yourself’… Personally I feel telling your prayer partner every single problem you have is wrong, there are some that we should take to God directly so we don’t end up like Vivian or Anna.

    • It is good to have a prayer partner, the Bible says that two are better than one (ECC 4:9), but one should be careful when it comes to issues like this. It is very risky to trust a lady with a secret such as this. Even if she didn’t say or react to it immediately, don’t worry, it’s a matter of time. If she sees no opportunity to say it, she will use it as an example or better still, a topic for preaching, Except she is a MATURED believer.
      For me, I’ll rather confined in a guy who is born again and can understand me. I believe guys can be trusted with secrets more than ladies.

  169. HAVING A PRAYER PARTNER
    ……

    Well i have never had one maybe because i dont easily trust people but what vivian did dosent really show she is a true Christian
    YES and the fact that tge basis for their friendship wasnt genuine and strong also contributed to what happened.
    Either way everybody deserves a second chance and i feel Anna should give Vivian a second chance because we are humans and are bound to exhibit those little traits in us only the help of God makes us live a Holy life.

    Having a prayer partner is good but also depends on who is your prayer partner.

    Choose wisely.

  170. I don’t think how Vivian reacted to the matter is the right way. Her friend having opened up to her, is on d foundation of repentance and in the place of prayer and Vivian doesn’t have any right to condemn her. But as humans, what do we expect? Humans remain human.

  171. Actually I’m not a fan of prayer partners. What I believe is that praying to God alone creates less distraction. Coming to the issue of secrets, “trust no one” is the notion. Telling someone about your secrets means you want your secrets to become public so do not get surprised when you hear your own secret from someone you do not know. Words spread fast. So whatever secrets you have should be revealed only to God.

  172. My mother said I shouldn’t trust anybody. In that case I don’t think I will spill secrets to a prayer partner simply because I think he’s born again. Also, having a prayer partner is not bad but completely leaving your whole self to him is not advisable. Remember he or she is also human and therefore subject to error.

  173. It’s good to have prayer partners but sharing our deepest secrets to anybody who isn’t trustworthy is never good because they tend to use it against us when an issue comes up. The character that Vivian exhibited towards Anna was childish and this story should serve as a lesaon to us all. Thank you ma for sharing this post, it reminds me of my past ecounter

  174. As friends,human beings and Christians we should avoid judging each other whether through our actions or words. A good friendship was ruined because of a “thou at holy attitude”. Some actions are more hurtful than words and words when said cannot be taken back. Being less judgmental is the best attitude to adopt.

  175. Vivian didn’t do well, Come to think of it; if she truly wanted to compare herself to her friend, she is not better than Anna, I mean She is still into her addiction while Anna’s mistake was in the past.
    She did wrong to condemn her friend the way she did.
    If God loves sinners who are we to condemn them, especially one whom is repentant?
    When it comes to matters as delicate as this I think it’s best to approach a God fearing leader for counseling and prayers instead of a friend who may decide to tell on you tomorrow.

  176. Finding a friend, a prayer partner and a secret keeper isn’t such an easy thing to do. But one thing we should consider is that we are all humans and for me, the only person I can confide in is Jesus because even with the dirtiest of sins and secrets, He is always there. In Him, my mistakes don’t become my end.

  177. It’s true partnership in prayer is nice but understanding is also needed and the person your are praying with also matters. When you partner with someone who is a critic,you end up not achieving the purpose. Vivian took it too far but I lobe the fact that she apologized to Anna. Even while Anna forgive s Vivian, she should be careful and you know study Vivian before committing such a secret to her hands.

  178. Having a Prayer parthner is good because it helps in motivating and encouraging each other.
    But sharing your flaws with your prayer parthner is not acceptable to me because as a human he/she is with a limited level of understanding, may decide to hurt you with what you must have shared to him/her.
    While choosing the right parthner in prayer, we should not forget to pray personally to God. He never avoids any kind of prayer offered to him with remorseful heart.

  179. it’s actually not bad to have a prayer partner but telling them everything about you is not advisable because they will surely use it against you one-day Just the way Vivian acted towards Anna’s prayer point.

  180. Having a prayer partner is good but you should know what type of prayer that you would like others to pray for you and know the ones that are your personal prayer and don’t judge someone because of his or her past life

  181. Prayer is most effective and important in life but having a prayer partner is the best some secrets are best left unsaid sometimes as this can make or Mar a person

  182. This post captures the truth that we see today. People claim to be born again, but do not exhibit the qualities of a true born again. Thank you for this post, ma!

  183. Having a prayer partner is good but we shouldn’t forget that we are still humans and no matter how you see this person as prayerful or good?. They will still judge you.
    Take your problems to God!

  184. The idea of having a praying partner is helpful, especially with someone your close too, one should be able to open up to ones praying partner, because you can’t remain quiet forever and expect things to workout or your problems to be solved. Having your spouse as a praying partner works for me, you wouldn’t have to think twice or have doubts about sharing your problems.

  185. I liked the idea of them becoming Prayer Partners because we need to pray *for* and *with* others, not just on our own. Prayer isn’t meant to be solitary and self-focused.
    For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” (Matthew 18:19-20).. Now this is a sign that even Jesus wants us to have Prayer partners.
    But a Prayer Partner needs to be someone who understands you and you also understand. The last thing we want is for the person praying with us to get caught up in the drama of our *Stories* . Let’s look back at Vivian and Anna, they liked each other, but that was the level of their relationship; likeness. They hadn’t gotten to the level where they would have to share their deep thoughts with each other. Where they would understand themselves to the extent of even seeking advice from each other. That was why their partnership fell through before it could even get to the next layer . A prayer partner doesn’t really need a specific relationship, it might be a family member, your significant other(wife/husband), a neighbor, a friend from your spiritual community or even someone you connect with on Social Media who shares similar core values and spiritual beliefs as *YOU* . The key is to be willing to ask. Vivian was wrong when she used Anna’s past to crucify her. Yes, Anna once walked in the wrong path, but she said she had turned a new leaf. Vivian should have at least given her encouragement, not using the mistake she made to judge her.
    Anna on the other hand I would say was wrong. At first on reading where Anna told her she wasn’t a saint either, I thought Anna was right, after all Vivian masturbates. I felt she should make Vivian see the pain of being blackened by a mistake or past life. But going further, I realised that Anna just showed she thinks like Vivian, she has lowered her standards to that of Vivian. Yes, she felt bad, and she only wanted Vivian to see how bad she was feeling: she had no better option than be a VIVIAN! Which was actually the worst option.
    They both made mistakes. And I think not being prayer partners any longer was just a good choice. Because they were not meant for each other.

  186. prayer partner is a good thing when comabting the forces of evil. After all, two heads are better than one. But as a prayer oarpart, we shouldn’t judge our partner of their sins. What matters is that they have been saved.

  187. Personally, I wouldn’t buy the idea of a prayer partner. In a situation where we wish to have one, I think our prayer partner should be someone who understands us so well, so someone who wouldn’t judge us and someone we have known for a while.

  188. Like the popular saying two heads are better than one. I feel no one has the right to condemn anyone because no one is perfect. Jesus said in the bible “ye that hath no sin should cast the first stone”. Vivian had no right to act the way she did to Anna, because she was no saint herself. We also have to be careful with the things we tell people, our trust should only be on God.

  189. Being judgemental is something that happens in our society and everyday life. You see your supposed friends and sometimes that should help you overcome your trials, join forces with the enemies to fight against you..
    I believe that if Anna didn’t confront Vivian about her attitude, letting her know that she also knows her secrets, Vivian wouldn’t have asked for reconciliation.
    I don’t have much to say but “Treat other the way you want to be treated”

  190. Like Vivian said, Anna was simply childish and silly. She was too quick to pass judgment on Vivian not remembering hers. I ‘d say it isn’t good to be judgmental towards a friend especially when she shares her most sacred secret. At that particular time, she needs consolation considering the fact she have blamed herself all through for her mistakes. Being judgmental doesn’t help her but worsens her situation.

  191. Having a prayer partner is a very good idea because in my own opinion , it builds one prayer life. And the Bible said that when two or more are gathered he is always there in their mist. But before having a prayer partner prayer to God to reveal to you the best prayer partner that both of you will work in the same ideology, same understanding, same faith. Someone that will encourage the other’s spirit when backsliding in is not good to be judgemental because nobody is perfect, Vivian was too quick to judge anna, as a Christian dnt use someone’s past to judge them, anna realized that what she did was wrong , that is why she opened up to her prayer partner in order for two of them pray over it and ask God for forgiveness. Anna is more open and because of her openeness she made Vivian realize that she too is not so holy as she thinks, I think with this Vivian will learn her lesson.

  192. Vivian is a typical example of many Christians today. They judge others for sinning differently forgetting that we all have flaws. The struggle is against hell fire and not ourselves so we should work together as Christians to strive for salvation.

  193. We humans are not infallible, so any time we fall as struggling christians that we are,we get up, ask for forgivrness and strive not to make thesame mistake twice. And please,lets all learn to be less judgemental, seriously!

  194. Having a prayer partner does not just build your relationship with God, it also help you to be physically and spiritually strong in communicating with God and with ourselves too. We should try help each other to seek for repentance, not to be judgemental about it, for Christ die for our sins whether big or small.

  195. Having a prayer partner is nice they pray on your behalf, when you deviate or backslide from faith they help you to raise again. Having a prayerful partner builds and makes one stronger in faith. The Bible said judge no one so you won’t be judged , Vivian did a wrong thing by judging Anna because of her past. She was not supposed to condemn her cause she was remorseful for her past mistakes, that’s why she opened up to talk to her to ask God for forgiveness. Do not criticize people due to their past mistakes nobody is perfect. Thank you ma for this inspirational post

  196. Jesus Christ came primarily for sinners.Vivian should take cognisance of this fact and shouldn’t be a stumbling block to sinners who want to find their way back to God, Like prodigal son did. Don’t be judgemental, rather tell sinners that Jesus is interested on them,show them how much he loves them and care for their salvation. It’s human to err but divine to forgive. If you are a Borne Again, understand that you were saved by grace, not by your works. Christ found you at a given point and saved you. Like “Ogbu Cletus” suggested above, Anna should continue with Vivian as her prayer partner, since they have reconciled known each others strength. Because it won’t be easy for Anna to start looking for another prayer partner to start learning the person character all over again. Knowing the spiritual strength of your prayer partner before divulging your secrete is ideal,as Cletus suggested in his comment above. It is also good that Ann pointed out those weaknesses in Vivian’s prayer points, so that she would known that all ‘ve have sinned and fall short of the grace of God. And that all sin is sin and bound to be punished.

  197. Its bad to use people’s secret against them. I mean how can someone tell you something that is supposed to be a secret and you use it against the person. Being judgemental is very bad. Vivian didn’t act like a child of God. She wasn’t supposed to judge Anna like that and start avoiding her because of her past, afterall Anna was ready to confess her sins to God and be a changed person. I prefer talking to God personally about my sins because I don’t know who would judge me. I might think someone is OK for a prayer partner and then when he or she finds out about my secret, boom! I become the devil. I don’t like judgemental people and I wouldn’t like the idea of someone seeing me as the devil so I prefer to pray on my own.

  198. The fact I’ve done nasty things does not mean that God will not forgive me if I ask for forgiveness and the fact that you’re are my friend and I tell you stuffs I’ve done does not mean you have the right to judge me. if my friend sees me as a bad person because of things I’ve told her while she has her own flaws then there is no need been your friend or prayer partner because we can’t pray when we are not together spiritually and physically.

  199. It is already an axiomatic saying, that problem halved is problem solved. But in any circumstance we should always be careful who we confide in. It’s important to establish some trust as before divulging secrets to anyone. At least am glad Vivian realized she was wrong and apologized. It’s important for Anna to forgive and be in good relationship with her, whether or not they continue the prayer partnership. Nice post.

  200. i advise the two of them do separate. they are not sound enough to be prayer partners. And they have some individual thickets they need to personally solve: the help of God is needed here, and they are really not applying biblical principle here.
    Vivian’s attitude could really be depressive to anyone wishing to confess his/her immoral past times.
    Also having a prayer partner is not a bad idea but following the leading of the Holy Spirit in doing it is important. The secrets of prayer partners only end in their circle and should not be used against anyone as Vivian did. Maturity and wisdom is the principal thing needed here.

  201. We really need to be very careful, having a prayer partner does not mean we no longer have personal prayers.

  202. having a prayer partner is not a bad idea, it is a form of having someone to interceed for you which is totally fine. HOWEVER, with the way the world is going and how evil people are becoming day by day, in a world where fathers now lie with their own daughters and best friends betray each other in all sorts of ways, my advice to anyone is- please pray on your own. God does not need to hear your prayer request from someone else before he answers. God knows our hearts already even before we open our mouths to ask, so to save oneself from this kind of stress, its best to pray for yourself by yourself.

  203. They lack understanding of the need for prayer partner, it is not an avenue to know and hold someone secret, it is not a platform to judge somebody but an avenue to sharpen one another the Bible said iron sharpenth iron. That is why it is mostly encouraged for couples to be prayer partners. Because you are prayer partner with someone doesn’t mean you use the things a person tell you in the course of prayer to relate with that person. May the lord have mercy on us all.

  204. Vivian didn’t try oooo,as a child of God we are not meant to judge other people or even avoid them, especially those that has realized their mistakes and decide to change.
    No one is perfect, even vivian herself might have done something worse before and yet claim righteous….
    But keeping malice is not the best though,they should put everything aside and pray.

  205. Prayer partners are good even for personal development, for iron sharpeneth iron. But you must check the mental and spiritual strength of your partner before saying some deep stuff be it wife, parent, brother or colleague. How do you do that? Tell them one little secret at a time and watch how they handle it before you proceed to a deeper one. As for Anna, go back to your partner. You guys have just sealed the friendship by reconciling with each other. Now you will feel more comfortable around her than any new partner you want to choose now.

  206. Anna’s stance certainly doesn’t mean we should sieve out the idea of a prayer partner, but then, if we say that a problem shared is half solved, we should also take time to understand the clear difference between a problem and a secret.
    A prayer partner to me as the name implies, is someone we commit our prayers along with and not necessary our secrets with.
    Coming to what would make best for a prayer partner… it doesn’t matter the relationship, sex or professional sameness we can make a prayer partner out of anyone, it just requires to state the purpose clear and that’s all. For Anna and her friend, I advice they bury the hatchet and move on with their prayer-partnership, but this time, they should keep their individual secrets to themselves respectively.

  207. I think its okay to have prayer partners because God said himself that when two or more people are gathered in his name, he will be there. But I think it stops there, I think only God should get to know my prayer point as I am communicating with God and nobody else. Some people may hear your prayer point and naturally, start seeing you in a different light because “you were not what they thought you were”. However, I think it’s terrible to judge someone, especially judging them with their past and if someone should trust you enough with their secrets and how it’s bothering them, the least you could do is try to understand and not be judgemental no matter how hard it may be.

  208. Having a prayer partner is very good, but the problem is choosing the right person,chose someone you can trust and who express the same faith as you.Vivian did not play the role of a good friend and prayer patner for judging Anna by her past,instead of advicing and supporting her spiritually,because iron sharpenent iron.

  209. We just have to face the fact that not everyone can handle our issues, weaknesses and problems and so we have to be careful who we share certain things with.

  210. There are times one gets weak in his/her prayer life but because of his prayer partner the prayer fire is rekindled, so prayer partner is essential and I don’t see anything wrong in sharing secrets with your prayer partner so far as you prayerfully and you were led of the HOLYSPIRIT to choose the one as a prayer partner, and also wisdom should direct you on releasing prayer points as it takes maturity to handle sensitive life issues even in prayer especially as regards to others

  211. Am not against prayer partners but its a delicate relationship. One need to apply wisdom in all issues; you have to know your prayer partner in to to. This will help to understand and know the kind of secrets to share with him or her.

  212. It is good to pray together afterall the Bible tells us that where two or three are gathered there He is. But in the midst of gathering to pray, it is worthy to note that there are some prayers that are personal ie, personal prayer points . Let us know that which is personal and those that are worth sharing.

  213. I have never heard of a prayer partner before this is my first time of hearing it. I buy the idea of having a prayer partner and when we want to have we should find a person we can trust.

  214. Having a praying partner its not bad. But being alone praying its not bad either. So it did be better praying alone with your God. But having a friend to share life issues is also good because no one is an island.

    From the good read I learnt to mind sharing confidential issues with people.

  215. It’s not bad to have a praying patner but I think some secrets are not just meant to be told no matter your relationship with anybody

  216. Having prayer partner is good, but keep your secret for yourself. You can just have someone you can be praying with, because God said that, where two or more people gathered he is always with them!

  217. Vivian did not act as a true child of God,he supposed to keep the secret,some secret don’t need to be told to any other person so that human divinity would be restored,we have to Know the kind of friend we keep even if the person seems to be child of God

  218. Vivian really judged Anna quickly and her reaction was out of context. Vivian opening up to her means that she trusted her as a friend and prayer partner and then she started avoiding her. We are all human, we make mistakes all the time and we are in no position to judge another. Vivian is just another man judging another for sinning differently.

  219. First of all, I think Anna was too quick in trusting Vivian and the later too quick in judging. I think Anna should have waited for sometime before laying such a huge secret on a platter. Probably, she thought she knew her well enough, but mostimes people let you in on only the part of their lives they want you to see. AND, Vivian putting up the holier-than-thou attitude appeared to have a skeleton in her cupboard as well. All in all, I think both ladies should make up and continue with their prayers and never succumb to the devil’s tactics.

  220. I don’t believe in prayer partners,I can ask someone to join me in prayers sometimes but I can’t have someone as a permanent prayer partner.That would also be putting someone in a position to probably tell me things he/she wouldn’t like to share.

  221. Having a prayer partner is very good because, the person helps in building a stronger fellowship wit God.. But I would prefer a spiritual councilor to talk with. Friends at some point disappoint, the secret u feel dey can keep will b exposed when there is a misunderstanding between the both of u. so to me the best is to have a spiritual counsellor to guide you abt life in general.

  222. Jesus Christ came primarily for sinners.Vivian should take cognisance of this fact and shouldn’t be a stumbling block to sinners who want to find their way back to God, Like prodigal son did. Don’t be judgemental, rather tell sinners that Jesus is interested on them,show them how much he loves them and care for their salvation. It’s human to err but divine to forgive.
    On the issue of prayer partner,Having a prayer partner is very good because, the person helps in building a stronger fellowship wit God.. But I would prefer a spiritual councilor to talk with

  223. Well, personally, I prefer praying alone, in my room locked up. That way I feel more connected to God and I feel free to express my joy, fears, worries and problems to God without been interrupted. But in as much as i enjoy praying alone, having a partner isn’t a bad idea. The only pertinent thing there is to find someone who understands you and wouldn’t judge or make you feel worse. It was really awful for Vivian to judge Anna like that.. And she forgot that if God judged us that way, no one could ever stand in His throne of mercy. Truly, i agree with Samuel Johnson, “To keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect others to keep it is folly” but nevertheless,Vivian should have forgiven Anna, because, to forgive is divine.

  224. Vivian was judgemental which was very wrong. She had no right whatsoever to judge Anna,at least they were supposed to encourage each other than create bad impressions about each other in their mind. people make mistakes and anna was totally repentant…and I hope she kept the secret to herself , who knows if she might have spilled it anyway.

  225. For someone to talk to you about his/her problems means that you are trusted
    Being judgemental is very bad
    If the Lord Jesus can forgive her and accept her back who are you to judge her
    Vivian is not a true Christian cause if she is she would never open her mouth to says those words to Anna
    It was her past life before she became a Christian
    Vivian needs God in her life than Anna does because Anna acknowledged her own sin while Vivian hid her’s inside her and covers it with garment forgetting that you can deceive everyone except God.

  226. Praying partners are good though Not everybody likes praying with people or a particular person. anywhere you see yourself and any particular point In Time you should pray and not wait for a particular person to come and join you in prayers because people would end up judging you or criticizin you when you call out your sins too them even listening to your prayer request the only person fit to be your prayer partner is your husband Or your children thank you ma’am for the write up

  227. I believe having a prayer partner is very Wonderful,it helps a lot and it gives room for one to share burdens and be relieved, but then human beings are human beings, one should be careful about making a prayer partner choice so that your secrets wont be let out..nice story ma

  228. It good to pray alone and tell all our problems to God but in the bible it said if two or more are gathered in my name am in their mist.a prayer partner is good and it helps strengthen our prayer life.

  229. Hmmmmm! Having a prayer partner is sometimes cool though but the people we deal with here are humans. Not everyone can confide in people, they find it hard to let out their secrets especially wen it’s an horrible past. But there’s sometimes a relief wen you share it but hard. Thanks mama.

  230. They say I’m a loner and taciturn by nature. But this is exactly why I don’t associate much, personally I’ve been in situations where friends turned enemies overnight. It’s really disheartening(most times over the pettiest things), because it’s one of the most factors that breed insecurities and mistrust. If someone expresses their weakness. To us, their said ‘friends’why take advantage of that? Worst still alot of christains feel entitled to holiness these days. Would be nice if some of them critics actually practice what they preach and stop harsh judgements especially when someone is struggling to pull out from dark paths.

  231. Having a prayer partner is good and all but one should be careful the kind of people they mingle with. Anna acknowledged her own sin and vivian as her friend and prayer partner was meant to encourage her and help her instead of acting how she did

  232. Sometimes having to talk to either friends or parents, siblings, even spouse could be hard in term of sharing something that is bothering someone and it depends. Keeping it in mind that is very wise to share problems because there could be a help somewhere, from them. Trust is something we should watch out and learn for. Do you trust your friend,spouse so much that you can tell certain stuffs? I just think a family member would be better off. Yeah, they could scold you but talking about the prayer part, they are going to be awesome. Though we have friends who are Understanding, if you don’t have such friend, please quit. Don’t forget a prayer partner is very awesome but if none is available to you, still stick to praying yourself, God still works wonders no matter how many we are in his midst. Just have the grace and faith that things are going to work out fine with him at your side all time.

  233. Prayer partner is a lovely Idea because you get to pray more and effectively, but as Christians we shouldn’t judge anyone it isn’t our right to do so rather correct with love.

  234. I really agree with Samuel Johnson on that…there are certain things one should not discuss with a friend. Keep your secrets to yourself, keep your next move to yourself..be unpredictable most times in your actions. Because one day they will use your secrets AGAINST you.

  235. Having a prayer partner isn’t a bad idea at all. But, our prayer partners should be people we can really trust with our problems. Though, in human relationships, there are always misunderstandings which is inevitable, but, can be managed. We shouldn’t let those misunderstandings weigh us down, instead, we should forgive and move on. Anna and Vivian should let their misunderstanding slide, but Vivian should be more careful with her secrets next time.

  236. HAving a prayer partner is not such a bad idea but I dont think I would buy into that idea. I am a secretive person and it might take a while to trust someone else completely yoo want to share my secrets. Also, in choosing a prayerpartner, we should involve God so we dont make mistakes.

  237. I enjoyed this story,but I am not really into the whole prayer partner thing, because if it’s with the wrong person, something that you want to be personal and private can become the news of the day in church or the office or anywhere else, it’s better if you pray yourself or someone higher spiritually pray for you

  238. Like Vivian, we shouldn’t be quick to judge others. After all judging is a sin since we all have our flaws and aren’t perfect. Anna helped us realise that we make mistakes too although she let anger override her sense of thinking which is not Christian like.

  239. I think you’d definitely have to be more than just a friend for you to be my prayer partner. It comes with a lot of responsibility and as humans, we all err. While it’s nice to have someone share your burden, I think it’s far better and will give you piece of mind, the realization that only you and God, knows your secret.

  240. I think you’d definitely have to be more than just a friend for you to be my prayer partner. It comes with a lot of responsibility and as humans, we all err. While it’s nice to have someone share your burden, I think it’s far better and will give you piece of mind, the realization that only you and God, knows your secret..

  241. I believe having a prayer partner is good, it helps a lot and we have the opportunity to share burdens and get relief. But we have to choose wisely

  242. A prayer partner is a motivator. He/she encourages in being active in spiritual matters. Listing out things to pray about with your partner isn’t bad, but I prefer the everyone keep their intentions at heart. One can easily be judged with the ‘prayer points’ listed, like that of Vivian and Anna’s case.
    A prayer partner shouldnt jxt be that, but also friend whom you trust and can confide in.

  243. Most successful relationships are built with the pillar of prayer. Like the saying goes ‘those that pray together stays together. Let us learn to emulate the spirit of prayer.

  244. We don’t have the right to judge our fellow human,because no one is perfect.We always expect God to forgive us of our sins whenever we go to him; why can’t we then forgive others.

  245. Some people underestimate the power of praying together. Even the Bible said where three or more people are gathered praying, i am in their midst. We should learn to pray together with our friends, partners, family . it helps.

  246. That’s one thing that cones with it,but I tell you that genuinely saved Christians will never insult you with the little secret you shared with them as prayer pertnerd.And it becomes so dangerous when there is no trust. Its true we are humans but we should be led by the Spirit.

  247. Having a prayer partner is good but it’s not easy expect by the Grace of God. You just have to be prayerful and vigilant before you engage in prayer sections with someone.

  248. Having a prayer partner is good but not easy expect by the Grace of God. You have to be prayerful and vigilant before engaging yourself with a prayer partner.

  249. I personally buy the idea of having a prayer partner but it should be someone you know can still stay even after knowing your past.also as humans we should not be judgmental. Vivian should not have acted the way she did towards Anna because she agreed to be her prayer partner therefore she should also be a true friend. Also we should not easIly trust people.

  250. I think we need prayer partners. But of course, some ground rules should be put in place like, not using someones prayer point against the person. For me, I think parent or spouse would make better prayer partners. As for Anna and Vivian, they should forgive each other and try not to let what happened repeat itself.

  251. What they both did could be likened to when a Catholic priest divulges what he hears during the confessional to a third party, this is considered an abomination/sacrilege in the Catholic faith.
    We should all learn to leave judgement for God and God alone. We have no right/authority at all to judge our fellow human.

  252. Having a prayer partner is very good and but some sometimes we should learn to present our deepest secret to our high priest that can understand us better

  253. Having a Prayer partner is indeed a very wonderful idea to buy, even the bible made us to understand that where two or three are gathered in Gods name that he is in there mist, but that doesn’t mean that God does not answer the prayer of one person. Talking about the secrecy in their prayer request, it is totally inconsequential, when it comes to praying it has to be carried out with all level of seriousness, all their secrete should die between the prayer partners, because if it gets to the hearing of another person it is therefore not longer prayer but gossip. And God cannot attend to such prayer requests.

  254. Having a prayer partner is not bad at all. One thing we need to know is human beings will remain human beings. Sometimes we allow emotions and wrong judgement into us, sometimes we feel better than each other, it’s normal and expected. So when choosing your prayer partner be careful and prayerful. I believe the best prayer patner I can choose is my parents,spouse or spiritual mentor. May God help is IJN

  255. Hmmmmm
    Sometimes prayer partners are still good we need just to be more careful in choosing who to engage with…..

  256. In the course of having a prayer partner, there are some things one needs to consider. Someone who you can call a sister, someone who you know that doing trials or any challenge, she would encourage you, someone you know trust so much and you know that the person would never use your secret against. Though I don’t appreciate having a prayer partner cause I believe that whatever problem I have, u can settle it alone with God instead of involving an outsider who may not understand me.

  257. I’m beginning to rethink about trying again to have a prayer partner. I’ve always tried to have one but it will not always work sometime it’s my fault though.

    I just remembered a sister that left the church because her prayer partner told her to pray for her that a brother wants to marry her and the she’s didn’t know that her partner was expecting the same brother to marry her.
    Sometimes, it might not be easy having a prayer partner. So I suggest that wisdom is the principal thing here and some prayers are better made with God alone

  258. Having a prayer partner does not mean that we should pour out all our secrets to them, Anna should not have told Vivian her secret and just face the prayer they came for, Vivian on her part did not get it right at all, being someone prayer partner means you bear their burden as if they are yours, thank God they ended well

  259. Sincerely ma’am, this is a good read. I really let off muffled throaty sounds. Had to muffle them so my room mate won’t freak out. I for one would never share my personal problems with a friend. I don’t even have a prayer partner. I could share issues with my Pastor because I believe he has discretion. He will not rat out on me. The only person I could tell the darkness of me should be my better half.
    I hate snitches!
    God bless you ma’am.

  260. Having a prayer partner is actually a good thing because whereever two or more are gathered in his name,he is there. I’m not saying personal prayer does not reach God, but its good to have an accountability partner in things like this. Having someone who knows what’s wrong with you will help you put an end to that problem because he or she will be there to help you as an accountability partner, which brings me to Vivian. Personally, what she did was very wrong. Remove the dirt in your eye before doing that of another. She trusted Vivian enough to reveal her secrets in hope that they could sort it out in the place of prayer together but Vivian went on judging her with her actions forgetting that she had masturbation problems herself.
    Anna should see her female pastor about the problem. She will be a better accountability partner.

  261. Wow! This story reminds me of a something similar. We shouldn’t judge people but try to correct and accept them and help them if possible. We should also learn to respect people’s privacy.

  262. For the fact that our God is alive no one should be judged or condemned. No believer should judge another or condemn anyone of what has happened in the past or present for the bible says in Roman 8:1 there is now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.

  263. This is a situation I can totally relate with, not the prayer partner part but relating your problem to a fellow Christian. It isn’t a crime to trust someone and tell the person your most dirty secrets,it now becomes a crime to break that trust. If someome trusts you enough to tell you his/her secrets you should be matured enough not to break that trust

  264. I prefer telling my secret or problems to older people that way l don’t feel embarrassed when am scolded. Having a prayer partner isn’t a bad idea as long as one can take the chaos that comes with it. This story leaves me wondering if there are friends that won’t at one or the other judge you.

  265. I think it’s not a bad Idea to keep a prayer partner but its better to tell to God alone.Everything we do depends on how we get to understand it. Vivian is being judgemental here. She thinks she is better than Anna, both physically and otherwise, because she is still a vergin.But to the glory of God both of them are prayer partners, so Anna let out her own secret which made Vivian to calm down.I also suggest that Vivian should forgive her, but they should keep their secrets to themselves and let it to God alone.

  266. I think people should stop judging others , even the bible admonishes us not to judge others so as not to be judged. As the bible rightly tells us; I don’t think they were meant to be prayer partners, because they don’t understand each other… This also occur in most relationships

  267. Hmm, this is deep. No one can keep your secret as best as you. I agree that having a prayer partner is good but I feel it has to be with someone you’ve known for a while and who knows you, someone whom you trust and trusts you too, and someone who has the same knowledge as you. These can help to avoid confessions and disappointments. I also think that we shouldn’t judge people based on their pasts. If Christ could accept us just the way we are, not minding our past, then we all should be able to, considering that we are Christ like.

  268. I never believed in prayer partners simply because I think whatever you want to pray for, you can do it yourself. God can hear each and every one of us. Also I believe my prayers, just like my confessions should just be between me and my God. As heart touching as the story is, it definitely sealed my decision on prayer partners and it’s not for me

  269. Having prayer partners isn’t a bad idea, as a matter of fact, it’s a nice idea, but there should be a limit to it.
    I mean, since we pray on our own regardless of having a prayer partner, such prayers could be prayed in our closet, just you and your God, cos whether we like it or not, at some point the prayer partner might want to judge you, not intentionally tho but we are all humans.

  270. Having a prayer partner is not a bad thing but it requires knowing the rightful person to choose. We must know that sometimes, our partner might be an agent of temptation to us. Therefore, we should always put our prayer partner in our own individual prayers.

  271. Having a prayer partner is not bad at all especially if it’s someone who helps in building and strengthening your faith ND I believe that no one is in a position to judge anyone.

  272. The idea of a praying partner isn’t bad but it takes prayer to find a praying partner. Praying partners are not just chosen because of you guys are compatible in the outside.
    Vivian was so quick to to judge her prayer partner and this is why people keep to themselves a lot.

  273. Having a prayer partner does not mean that we should disclose all our secrets to them as Anna did. Also mind the kind person you chose as your prayer partner. If not, I would prefer praying alone instead of keeping a prayer partner (s).

    Thanks

  274. Having a prayer partner is not bad at all, it just requires you finding the right person and one can easily get a prayer partner if you pray to God about it
    That someone is your prayer partner doesn’t mean you have to tell him or her all your secrets humans can’t be fully trusted, some secrets are best not known to anyone

  275. Praying together or having a prayer partner is a good idea but it does not really mean that we are meant to share our secret with each other just as Anna did.i have really learn alot from this.knowing the kind of person you disclose your secret to matter’s alot,they might use it against you someday.

  276. The devastating thing between this two friends is that,they leverage on each others flaws without painstaking the fact that,nobody is perfect.

  277. I don’t see any anything wrong disclosing your little secret with your prayer partner… Infact, doing so makes u free… A prayer partner should be able to understand you and the other way round… God bless you

  278. Having a prayer partner is not bad but how well or how deep can you share your personal issues or secret with them, I also feel that a prayer partner is just someone who can pray for you or pray with you not your secret book.

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